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November 30, 2007

Balance Between Boredom and Stress

My mother has always described to me that the best way to live is balanced. She goes on to tell me this means a balanced breakfast, a balanced diet, a balanced schedule and so ona nd so forth. The problem was that I wanted to have fun! Balance was boring. I would rather spend much more time playing than doing responsible things. However, I have learned that in the long run; balance is of the utmost importance. I always try to focus on the goals and the aftermath when I work on remaining balanced. I try to realize that if I do equal amounts of homework then fun that I will be rewarded in the end. I have learned the hard way what happens with too much fun. All of a sudden their is an upsurge of responsibilities that must be done. I try to remember thos difficult times when I would rather ignore boring tasks. Also, I do my best to not have stress build up too much. Spreading an assignment out rather than finishing it the night before its due makes for less stress and better results.

Ownership of a Problem

I have often been face by difficulty to take ownership of a problem. Generally, the ownership of any problem is with the person who i frustrated. Frustration is a complex emotion. I have experienced it first hand. A good exampe is of an occurence that happened between my younger brother and I. We had just recieved a christmas present of a video game that was given to both of us. The problem was that we couldn't decide who should get to play with it first. I was the first to get extremely frustrated with the situation. I was excited and I wanted to revel in the glory of playing that game firstmost. After all, I was the oldest. My frustration grew to the point to where I got into a physical fight with my broter. Rather than owning up to the problem, I started a fight. Frustration messes with people's decision making skills. That is why I hope to always own up to my problems in the future.

Daily Responsibilities

I react in different ways to daily responsibilities. Usually I handle the easier and more enjoyable responsibilites in a carefree, happy manner. However, the dull responsibilities have never been easy for me to deal with. I get everything done most of the time. However, I may sulk becasue of the displeasure they might have caused me. I sometimes feel overwhelmed. This especially occurs when I don;t manage to complete all the responsibilities from the prvious day so I have to accomplish more in a smaller time frame. These times are often difficult. I do my best not to panic but it happens. For example, I once had to sit in the library for over nine hours because I had a ton of homeowkr I needed to finish for the following day. In my future, I hope to use my dialy tasks to remind me of goals that urge me to perform at a higher level. If that were the case I may be able to have fun and do a good job on each and every one of my tasks.

Life Planning

I have never really like planning. I have always felt that if I live more "spur of the moment" that I would have more fun. However, I'm finding that I may be wrong in this regard. Planning can be very helpful in setting up goals and seeing them through. My main goal is to find out what major or profession I would like to study for my future. My current way of thinking seems to have slowed down my decision. I am still undecided and it makes things all the more difficult. Apparently, planning would have been the better way to go. I still wish it could be different. I want to be surprised in life but never by catastophes. I need to work on planning out external subgoals while enhancing psychological factors and person supports key to my happiness.

What I Do Best

What is it that I do best? This is a difficult question. Not because there are many things I do well; quite the oppisite actually. I would have to sy the thing that I do best is think creatively. Some of my friends have noted at my starnge interpretations. However, the only reason they are strange is because I like to think of things differently. The unreal has always been so much more exciting than the real for me. I have daydreamed on what it would be like to be a wizard or actually partake in one of the video games I play. My imagination has always made things more interesting. This may change within the next five years as when I get older, most likely I'm going to have to become more mature and responsible. Oddly enough, my mastery level in this case will most likely go down however, I hope not. I hope I am the strange old guy that still acts much younger than his age. In that way I could master creativity to somehow entertain other. Possibly through writing a book or some other way. Thinking of what I do best is helpful in giving me hints to what I would be succesful in for my future.

Favorite Activities and Growth Needs

The Career Planning book defines growth needs as essential stimulations such as exploration and interaction that help humans grown and resist stress. I feel as if I;m under a lot of stress lately so anything that can reduce them would be a huge help. That is why I feel it is important to take part in some of my favorite activites. These icnlude hanging out with friends, playing video games, biking, running, swimming and playing soccer. If I spend all my time doing schoolwork and nothing else than my growning process may actually slow down. I'm sure that I don't want that to happen. Also, I don't need to be told twice to do the things that I enjoy. However, what happens when you are overwhelmed with schoolwork and can't find the time to do fun things? I hope I solve this question in my near future.

Wasting a Lifetime of Work

"Dietrich Bonhoeffer said "If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction." I got this quote from the "My Wonderful Life" class handout. The truth is that many people do "run along the corridor in the other direction." Many people end up progressing towards a job or an event that they are not really going to enjoy. Most often, people do this because of money. A person will attempt to become a lawyer oir doctor even if they hate the job, because the pay-off is better. I have set a goal to never do anything soley for the money. The truth of the matter is that you have to enjoy what you are doing to become a happy person. Money really doesn't buy happiness. If I ever find myself progressing towards something that will serve no point, I hope to stop what I'm doing.

November 29, 2007

Fantasy Goals

I love the idea of fantasy goals. For example, I sometimes wish I was a wizard that could cast spells to be instantly done with, for example, homework. However, the fantasy goals mentioned in the Career Planning are slightly different from this. The term emphasisez the importance of differentiating the goals we want and the goals we are willing to work for. I hope to work hard for all of my goals. At the present, my main problem is that I don't have enough goals to strive for. I may outside of the norm by saying that I would rather have a job I enjoy than a job that pays well. However, the problem is that I don't know what job I will enjoy. Therefore, my current fantasy goal is to find out what major and then profession I want to go after.I truly hope it is not a fantasy to find a job that will make me happy.

Diversity

I feel some disagreement with the Carrer Planning book on its chapter on "Understanding Cultural Diversity" (Chapter 6). It mentions the importanc eof understanding the inevitability of rascism. I feel like race should not hold any importance. If more people began to feel this way there would be no need for understanding all racial view. People need to appreciate diversity but without holding it as a huge part of life. Rascism has not gone away. I know that. But, if more people started to adopt the belief that race doesn't hold that much significance then rascism might begin to fade. I realize I may be ignorant on the issue but I have stated my beliefs.

"Glass Ceiling"

The "glass Ceiling" is referring to the invisible bar that creates a barrier in which people can rise no further. This is usually involved with jobs. It used to be that if you work extemely hard and use your intelluigence; there was a possibilty in moving upward. However, that system has become much more lateral than vertical. This outcome scares me. I want ot be successful in my fute but it sound slike there may be an invisibler restriction on success. I want to enjoy my future profession first, however I am hoping for succes to support the people that I care about.

"Peeling back th onion"

"Peeling back the onion." This phrase first reminds me of the movie Schreck. I am guessinf most people have seen the movie but if not I can describe the scene I'm thinking of. The ogre is trying to explain himself to his donkey friend sby saying that ogres are like onions. The donkey is completely lost at this analogy when he concludes ogres must make people's eyes water like onions. However, the ogre explain that it is because they have different layers; just like onions. The fact of the matter is the people have layers too. "Peeling back the onion" refers to the action of reflecting on one's past to uncover clues to the authentic self. I have tried to do this a number of time. When I was a child I enjoyed ebing creative. Whether pretending out blancket forts were huge castles or having in-depth battle scenes with my old action figures; creativity was a blast. I loved adventure. Since there were no real adventures available, I made them up. What does this mean to me now? I need a profession in which I can experience some adventure. However, I have been having trouble finding this profession.

http://tx.technion.ac.il/~mariak/shrek.jpg

-Shrek

Being Yourself

"Honesty is the best policy." I have been told this so much that I am beginning to think that there is some truth in it. However, how does a person manage to completely act how they normally act in every given situation. For example, I enjoy being social and energetic around friends and those I am comfortable with, however in serious situations I feel that I must be as serious as the situation itself. I don't like this reaction. I would rather be myself in every situation. I'm not currently sure of a solution. But, the way I see it is that the sooner I can fully understand and be myself; the sooner I can decide on a major that defines me.

Potential Career: Actor

Who doesn't love the movies? Movies create secret agents that save the world, people with super powers that defy the laws of physics and monumental wars in history come alive. I have looked up the people who act in these movies with awe and amazement. How do they do it? They become another person. Actors and actresses change their personalities to entertain milions of people. I wonder how it would feel to know that you just made a million people laugh with a funny joke in a movie. Being an actor would be sweet. Money would not be a problem if i were succesful. However, there lies a major problem. The likelihood of my become an actor is unlikely. I have never even performed in a play. I have wanted to, however peer pressure told me that plays were uncool. Unfortunately, I was dumb enough to listen.

http://www.dealbreaker.com/images/entries/hollywood-sign.jpg

Hollywood: Where movies supposedly come to life

College

College life is a paradox. It is probably the only place I can think of that allows you to go from having the best time of your life to some of the most difficult moments of your life within moments. I have a lot of fun hanging out with friends. However, the schoolwork has not been any fun at all. Possibly, this could be because I have not begun to take the classes that I like. But, I have the problem that I don't know which classes I might like.It all makes for a confusing place. Sometimes people run wild playing games while other times people become living statues in classes where its all serious and no games. I feel I'm experiencing to oppisite levels of fun. I want to find the in-between of college life. I don't know how this can be achieved but I hope that I din out. Friends of mine keep dropping out and it confuses me. I'm no smarter than they were so what am I doing here? I feel like I'm looking for answers in the wrong place. Who knows though; this is the nature of a paradox.

Aging

Time is the one thing that every person in the world must do battle with. Some people are wishing they were older faster while others are reminiscing of their younger days. At the same time, people are fighting to get to work on time or to complete that huge research paper due the following day. Time is difficult, however it is completly natural. An obvious statement is that as we age we gain experience. The less obvious statement is that aging can be seen is a good thing. I hope to always feel that way. I have seen and been one of the people that expresses loathing for aging. Soemtimes, I really do wish I was back in grade school where ebryhting seemed so easy and laid out for me. However, I hope to keep a more positive attitude. Better yet, I will set a goal for myself to be more positive. While the future is cloudy and uncertain; time will tell.

Mid-Life Changes

My parents have dealt with their mid-life changes in a succesful way. When I become an adult, I hope to be able to do the same. Looking back, I want to be happy with everything I have achieved. Both my parents were not completely pleased with everything in retrospect. However instead of sulking, they did something about it. My father has made a monumental transition in my jobs while my mother has obtained a job after twenty years of being an at-home-mother. While I hope to be happy with everthing during my mid-life change. I believe that I will inevitably find something to my distaste. I also hope to be able to make the different to make my life better.

Social Pressures

Social pressures are everywhere. I can't leave my dorm room without feeling these pressures. They are why people feel they need to dress up, or stay clean, or wear matching outfits, etc. Social pressures affect the way people live. I have had many different thoughts for a future profession. However, with every potential candidate I'm forced to think of how society will react. "I can't become a nurse, thats not manly." "I cant work at McDonalds, everyone will think that I'm a loser." These thoughts are some of these most detrimental idea any person can think of. The truth of the matter is that if people want to do something (within reason) than they should be able to do it without society telling them they can't. I hope to live by this in the future. My goal is to find a profession that I enjoy; whether or not it's trhe social "norm."

November 26, 2007

Spiritual Care

I am a very religious person and have a close intimate relationship with God in which I try to grow in and strengthen everyday. However, sometimes this is not always easy. I am challenged and ask questions all the time because I dig deeper and deeper into myself all the time. I feel like my religion helps me feel like my life has a purpose. I feel I can use nursing to fulfill this purpose also. I want to live in Windom were I grew up. I know most people in Windom are Christians but not really practicing Christians. I hope when I am someone’s nurse, even if they are not a Christian, I can help them become closer to God. Even if it’s just by example, they can see how I act around others, and maybe it will help then or even change their lives for Christ. This is my goal in life and I believe that is why each and everyone of us is on this earth-we just have to use the talents God gave us and our purpose will shine through to the world for God.

Mental Care

I have an extremely strong support system from my family and friends which gives me mental and emotional support. I can talk to my parents about anything and they are extremely helpful. The most stressful time I’ve had this year was coming to college which I’m sure was just as stressful for most freshman. I thought Morris was the end of the world for me at first. Thankfully I had a good support system and was able to talk to my parents and friends who really understand me. They were a big part of the reason I made it though my first month of college sanely. I am really glad I have the support system I do. It may not be extremely big with co-workers and things, but it is enough for me because the people care about me and know me extremely well. Because of this they put my best interest in mind which really helps me and I do the same for them when I am helping them.

Physical Self-Care

I know, just like 99% of Americans, I could have a better diet then I do know. My diet is really reliant on the fact I am always on the go. I was especially like this last year when I was in high school since I lived on a farm 15 miles away from town. When my family went in everyone went in and stayed until everyone was done. Because of this, we ate out a lot, but we mainly went to Subway which is one of the best possibilities. When at Subway, I would still make conscious choices about my food though. I normally just got a veggie sub with a glass of water and an occasional cookie or chips. However, I did (and still do) lead a very active lifestyle. In high school I was a three sport athlete and was involved in almost every club you could think of. I burned a lot of calories at practiced everyday so eating out so much didn’t have that great of an effect on me. Now in college I still work out 3 to 4 times a week. I would like to work out more but sometimes I just can’t find the time and keep myself sane. Exercising does relieve stress for me though so I love exercising whenever I can. Also, I really do not eat out since coming to college and food service offers a variety of healthy choices so my diet has been pretty well balanced.

November 19, 2007

Highly Stressful Situations

One extremely stressful situation I had all of my junior year was I had to plan our prom. This was a stressful situation because I had to get my whole class to work together at one time which was extremely difficult. It seemed at times I had a million things to do for prom plus take care of my classes and be a daughter, friend, girlfriend, sister, granddaughter, etc. It was especially stressful the month before prom. However, I was able to get through the situation with the help of my family and friends. I had a lot of people help me with little things which had to get done for prom which made my life a lot easier. I don’t know what I would have done without these people. The main people who helped me were my mom, and my friends Jenna, Missy, Kim, and Colin. During other stressful life situations these same people always help me through it. One recent situation was college. Adjusting to college was really hard and stressful for me but I made it through with the help of these people.

Maintaining a Balance

Maintaining a balance in life is something which I am always looking to improve on. It seems when I have something to do I have a ton of things to do and vice versa. However, I feel if I keep some constants in my life, I have more of a balance. I am an extremely active person, so working out for me is something I look forward to do daily. Through this I am able to relax and just focus on me for a little bit. Otherwise, I have things I do on certain days to keep my life balanced. On Wednesday’s I go to the Newman Center and I also go to IVCF, on Tuesday’s I go to a church home group, and on Thursday’s I go swing dancing. These are all activities I enjoy and look forward to attending. Sometimes they keep me sane. However, sometimes I am not extremely busy. It is during these times I do activities I really enjoy like go horseback riding or swimming. Otherwise I watch a movie or TV show I really like which is really rare.

Lashing Out

One time I will never forget in my life is when my volleyball coach lashed out at me in front of the whole team for what seemed like a life-time. I was in 9th grade and was playing on the b-squad. A varsity setter was doing poorly in practice and Mr. Wendorff (the coach) was getting pretty upset. So then he called me over from the b-squad practice to set for the varsity instead of Cassie (the girl who was doing poorly). I set the first ball, and I set it a little to low for a girl named Danielle who had an amazing vertical. I had never set to her before, and because she jumped so much higher then I expected her to (because no one I set to on b-squad jumps that high) I set it a little to low for her. After my first set, Mr. Wendorff blew up at me. He yelled and got in my face and told me how I should have been prepared to set it higher because I knew she had a high vertical. He is a 6 foot 5 inch man who is very in-shape and buff. I was terrified when he was in my face. However, I was so nervous to set for varsity as a 9th grader I wasn’t really thinking about the verticals of each of my hitters. Because I set this set a little to low I was taken out and Cassie was put back in. After 20 minutes of practice or so, Mr. Wendorff called me over and apologized. He said it was the “straw that broke the camels back? and he took it out on me. I will never forget this-it was one of the scariest times in my life.

November 15, 2007

How We View Ourselves

It has recently been called to my attention that we view ourselves in relation to the performance of others quite a bit more than I thought. I feel as if I have known of this for a while, but I say that it has recently been called to my attention because I’ve failed to really think about it until lately. When I think of my achievements, it’s possible that I begin by comparing them only to my past achievements, but I turn so quickly to the accomplishments of others that it’s hard to tell where I began. This is true not only with accomplished tasks, but also with everyday things such as hairstyles and teeth. I want to say that the more-physical aspects mostly come up with girls, but that can’t really be the case. Although they may not speak about it as openly, guys are sure to think about these things as well; perhaps they simply think in other terms or of other physical attributes, such as physique. We do focus quite a bit on figures in our society. It seems so crazy though, that we may complete something great and then compare it to the work of another person, when everyone is so different. And it often makes great achievements seem so small and unimportant. We compare and contrast our waistlines, or grades, our incomes, even our miseries and lack of sleep. Why do we do it? Is it really so crucial to our well-being that we did better than he did on that paper or that we gripe about how much less sleep we got than she did? What a waste of time and energy.

November 14, 2007

Financial Planning

I think I'm going to have the worst time with financial planning, not to say that I can't budget and all that, actually I think I will be good with those sorts of things, but the idea of planning for retirement seems a lot more difficult. I don't actually plan on making very much money in my career, enough to live and whatnot, but no more than that, so I think it is going to be difficult for me to realize when I need to put money away for retirement. I've always had something against choosing a career just to make money, just so you can buy that house and this car and whatever else you want. Not to say that people who think that way are wrong, I just always knew that I couldn't. I have a pretty good life right now, but I know that I could get by with a whole lot less and be just fine. I'm actually excited for the challenge of not being able to have a lot of frivolous things and having to make my own fun and entertainment through free things. I guess this attitude goes along with my craziness for career choice and being positive that I want to travel the world. I know I am not the typical American college student, but I think that's what makes my decisions even more fun to make, although I still am not sure how I'm going to be able to retire.....maybe I'll just marry rich...lol

Cultural Diversity

I always think it's really interesting to see how some people react to cultural diversity. Most people think it's for the best, at least in principle, and there are always those who are against it completely, but they are easier to figure out. I've never had a problem with cultural diversity simply because of the way I was brought up. I always had different cultures in my schools, especially in high school, and my parents never taught me to look differently at anyone because of our cultural differences. My high school was really good for opening eyes because there were a lot of different cultures with a lot of people belonging to each one. You could probably hear 5 different languages walking down the hallway if you paid attention, but I still know that there are people out there who get uncomfortable with it. I won't lie either, there are still times that I get uncomfortable with some cultural diversity when I feel outnumbered and unsure of the situation, but it is much easier for me to get over those feelings by talking to the people around me and realizing that we have a lot more in common than we thought. I think it will be very important for everyone to be able to handle cultural diversity in the workplace because it is getting more and more likely that you will be working with a large group of different individuals, so you better start getting used to it now.

Goal Setting

Everyone always talks about setting goals for the future and how important it really is, but I've never been able to set those goals that would probably end up meaning the most. I have my distant goals, like when I was in high school I knew I wanted to go to college and now I know what I want to pursue as a career, but I have never been good at setting those goals that get me to where I want to be. In high school I applied to three colleges, none of which I really thought that I would get in or would want to go to. I ended up getting into the two I didn't want to go to and had to pick between them. I dropped out my second semester and went on an intense search for a better college for me. This time I was able to set the smaller goals that I was lacking in high school. I applied to 14 schools and got in to all of them so I had a big range of options. Now I know what my career is going to be, but I have no plans for my college career that will really get me there. This time I don't think I'll have a do-over and that kind of scares me. I need to focus more on planning the rest of my college career so that I can accomplish my long-term goals, but I think I'm going to need a lot of self-motivation to do it.

November 13, 2007

Experts Identify Really Significant Time-Wasters

Of the eight “really significant time wasters? identified by experts (trivial phone calls, unneeded meetings, unexpected and uninvited visitors, unnecessary conversation, responding to phony crises or emergencies, procrastination, failure to say “no,? and routine and unproductive trivia), I’m happy to say that only a few are actually present in my life to date.
Oh, on second glance, it appears that I’ve experienced six of the eight. Yikes. That’s quite a few more than I thought. It seems as though I’ve encountered all of those with the exception of unneeded meetings and responding to phony crises or emergencies, each of which I’m sure to have to deal with in the not too distant future, say, once I have my first real job. I’d like to say that those first six things shouldn’t really be all that difficult to cut out, but I know better. I suppose I could just try to cut them down, but even that would be challenging since a few of them are almost completely out of my control. Trivial phone calls should be easy enough, though, if they’re undesirable phone calls. I suppose I could just not answer my cell if I see that the person who’s calling is someone I don’t have time to or don’t really, really want to talk to. That seems so rude though….hm… What’s next? Unexpected and undesirable visitors—let’s see…I can’t really see much of a polite way out of this one either. When unexpected or undesirable persons show up, society expects us to deal with them in a hospitable manner. I could attempt to shorten their visits, but I don’t know how well that would work without offending said visitors. Moving on—unnecessary conversation. I suppose this is semi-avoidable, but it can also be fun. Procrastination: as if I’d ever be able to stop that. Procrastination is like a natural part of life. Everyone procrastinates to some extent. I suppose I could try to be better about it though, and, in fact, I’m much better about it than a lot of people. Still, I’ll try to be better. There’s something I can at least work on. What’s next? Failure to say “no.? Yeah, I can be pretty terrible about that. I know I’ve gotten much better, but I still need to work on that. I should practice more. It’s just maddening for me to think I’ve disappointed someone or even let someone down, even though I doubt they ever think about it in that sense. Finally, one left: routine and unproductive trivia. I’m not even sure what that is…so, how can I reduce its presence in my life?
All in all, it feels as if I have less control over these things than I’d like—that is, unless I want society to turn its back on me due to horrible behavior towards other persons. Perhaps I’ll just work on the procrastination.

Today at 3:00

I completed my first assignment for KUMM, our school’s radio station. I went to interview a geology professor about a recent award he received for some very important research for the National Science Foundation. I got to use this awesome voice recorder, lay out the subject matter for the interview, visit his office, and conduct the interview myself! Wow. I didn’t think it was possible, but I’m pretty sure I’m even more in love with radio than I was before! On a related subject, I officially became a radio DJ last night after finally starting and completing my training with KUMM! I now have my own time slot on the air and everything! I’m so ecstatic I can hardly stand it! My devotion to and love of radio is beginning to make me seriously consider it as a career option. Imagine it—a career I’d actually enjoy!

November 12, 2007

Success and Failure

I look at success and failure as being determined by me and God. When I accomplish something, or have success, I am excited and tell myself all my hard work paid off. Also, I am pretty religious so I thank God for giving me the ability to have success because I know he is the one who enabled me to have the success. However, I tend to beat myself up over failure. I analyze the situation over and over again and think of what I did wrong and what I could have done differently. I also think of what I can fix for next time. I don’t ever really blame God for my failures I jut tell myself everything happens for a reason and God obviously wanted it this way, so I need to deal with it, learn from it, and move on. Which can still be hard on me because I continually beat myself up about it normally until I get it right.

Optimism

I try really hard to think of the glass as half-full instead of half-empty. However, this task is sometime difficult. An example this weekend would be when I got my first speeding ticket ever. My mom just told me she’s happy I’m okay, and that we’d deal with the ticket. That was a good way to analyze the situation as half-full instead of half-empty. Still, most of the time I can think positively about things, but I do find it harder to think optimistically about myself then it is about others. I like to help people with their problems and it’s really easy for me to tell them to look at the bright side of things. However, this is a harder task for me when I examine myself; if I have a problem I normally beat myself up about it. Sometimes I just need to give myself a break and not be as hard on myself which is some thing I’m working on and improving on.

Self-fulfilling failures

One of my best friends from high school has a brother who is three years older than us, his name is Cade. Cade has a friend named Tanner, and they both played basketball for our high school until they were juniors. Both of them were extremely good. Not necessarily because they practiced all the time, but because they loved the game and I mean they really loved playing basketball. This made them very passionate about the sport which made them really good at it. However, they never actually got to play in any games; the coach would put in 8th and 9th graders in (in a varsity game) before he would allow them playing time. They got so mad about it they ended up not going out for basketball their senior year. They decided they would never have a chance of playing so why go out for it? They looked at not playing during games as a failure and told themselves they would never get to, so that was a self-fulfilling failure for them both. They could have gone out and still had fun with their teammates and had fun at practice. However, the chose to miss out on their senior year (and last time to play in high school) of basketball all because of a self-fulfilling failure.

November 8, 2007

Present General Life Goal #3

My final of the three in this trilogy of goals is the most straightforward, but also the most detailed. I’ll start by stating it plainly: to become familiar with an even broader spectrum of people, places, events, and ideas. Clearly, this is not a short-term goal. In fact, this is more of the type of goal that lasts a lifetime, and I welcome its presence in mine. I’m not a flat character, the way many antagonists of children’s stories are, but rather, I am a round character—one with many sides and motives and plans. And in order to become such a round character, or person, I’ve had to be exposed to countless people, experiences, and ideas, as all people are. My goal here is only to continue that shaping of my being. I’d like to allow my person to keep on growing and changing, emotionally and in terms of experiences, throughout the entirety of my existence.

Present General Life Goal #2

Appreciate the little things. It’s a seemingly-simple goal, but it’s proven to be more difficult than I originally imagined. The origins of this goal, as well as the experiences that brought it about, are bad days.
I don’t have many “bad days,? just bad moments, really. I’d like to say that I’ve never experienced a bad day, but I’m sure I have. The thing is, I just don’t really let bad days get to me. A day can’t be all-bad, start to finish, if I don’t allow it to be, so I don’t. I make bad days better and attempt to prevent good days from going all-bad by merely doing things I enjoy and stopping to think about why my day is going in the direction it’s going. Not to sound complacent, but I’m quite good at looking at things positively, always the optimist. Well, ok, not always, but a decent percent of the time. I’m just working on that leftover percent. And I’m doing this without going overboard by convincing myself that it’s bad to be, well, sad. There’s a time and a place to be flustered or upset enough to cry, it just isn’t a majority of time and places, that’s all.

Present General Life Goal #1

One of personal life goals is to love my job/career. A person’s career consumes such a large portion of her or his life that having one he or she enjoys seems absolutely crucial, nay, it is absolutely crucial. To love my career and job, to be able to roll out of bed each morning with a smile instead of (or at least in addition to) a groan, now that would rock. The trouble with this goal is that it seems so difficult to accomplish. I can think of a handful of careers that I would be splendidly happy with, but attaining those careers will be quite the challenge. But nothing great can be achieved without some risks, right? If only I didn’t have so much trouble picking a career that I’d be happy with. I feel as if, once I’ve chosen a path, the goal will seem much more real and tangible.

November 7, 2007

Ladder Climbing

I would like to say I am climbing the horizontal ladder, but unfortunately most of the time I am climbing the vertical ladder. I’m an extremely competitive person, so I’m always competing with others in order to push myself. I do this in all aspects of my life, school, sports, etc. I know this part of me comes mostly from sports because it is such a big part of my life. However, in some cases I find myself climbing the horizontal ladder. One case of this is when I deal with horses. I know I will never be a pro rider nor do I want to be one. I am content with just riding for fun, and riding for me to do the best I can do. As I went to college some other things like this have transferred from the vertical to the horizontal stage. An example of this is chemistry lab; I really hate chemistry especially lab, and I know I’m not the best person in the room, so I just go there to learn and to do the best I can so I can finish the class and pass it.

Simple Strengths

Three simple strengths I have are: 1) I am good at organizing and putting together events. I like being in charge of events and have had several experiences doing so. I put on our junior prom, senior class trip, and was in charge of several fund raisers for both. I guess I just never really thought of it as strength because I always thought of it as something which has to get done and not very many people would do. 2) I am a natural athlete. I’ve been playing sports since I was able to walk mostly because my mom is a gym teacher and my dad loves sports. So as the first child, I had a lot of sport toys. I’m not amazing at sports, but I can pick up a sport and be pretty decent at it fairly quickly. I guess I never really thought of it as strength because it was just second nature to me. However, I realize it is because not everyone can do it. 3) I’m reliable and always on time. I hate it when people are late because it just puts everything behind. I am always early, and people can rely on me to do things and be places when I say I will be. I never really look at this as strength of mine; I just looked at it more as a pet peeve of mine. But I realize it is a simple strength of mine.

Daily Responsibilities

When I am confronted with a task/responsibility for the day, my motto is to just get it done to the best of my ability. However, sometime this is a hard task for me as I am a perfectionist; I need to do things 110%. Because of this, I sometimes feel overwhelmed at times, and it is not because of time management but just because of plain stress. I just get really worked up sometimes and then I realize I don’t need to be all worked up and then I’m fine. However, sometimes I do go into panic mode, and my adrenaline is so high I get so many things done I can’t believe it. Overall, I am fine when given a task or responsibility, and I do it 110%.

November 2, 2007

just the way i am i guess

well its always fun reflecting on yourself. ive done it enough times though so it dosent matter realy anymore. i dont know why i am the way i am but if i did would i realy be myself? one of the things ive noticed is that i procrasitinate alot. i always did in high school and now im doing it here. i told myself that i wouldnt do this when i got here to collage but still i havent changed. the sad thing is its not like i have anything better to do but i just dont do the work. ive been trying to fix this but it isnt always the easiet thing in the world to fix your own problems. if i had a problem with the work itself and didnt understand something it would be diffrent but its not like that. im a lazy person by nature how to fix this i just dont know

kitty

so i got a new kitty on tuesday, me and my girlfriend drove all the way to st. cloud mall just to get it too. its a calico and we names her athena. she is very nice and purs all the time. i love cats for some reason i do i do.

it kind of sucks though because we are not supposed to have cats in my appartment but i got one anyways. got to keep her on the downlow but she is so nice i think it would suck if they took her away. today she is sick though. she ate something not good and got sick and shes been sleeping all day. anyways i know its random but o well

A Serious Lack of Something

It is clear that human beings need appropriate levels of stimulation and opportunities to explore, interact with, and act upon the environment…

If that’s so clear, people should be exposed to more stimulating-activities in a given day. We are so underexposed to the wonderful world around us. Instead of enjoying a lengthy stroll in a nearby park, we sit inside all day and accomplish things that needn’t be accomplished. We tweeze our eyebrows and pay credit card bills and feather the dust off our appliances so that it can drift through the air and settle on our furniture. And while it’s true that some of us consider eyebrow tweezing stimulating, it would seem a mere nuisance if we only allowed ourselves to do more. What stimulates us these days? Coffee, pop, chocolate; in short, caffeine and sugar stimulate us. What if—and I know this sounds crazy, stay with me—what it more of us went out every day and did things, like really did things? What if society as a whole was not always expecting so much of us, so we actually had time to purposely get lost on a long walk or climb our neighbor’s great oak or learn an outlandish Latin phrase every once in a while? What if, because we enjoyed our jobs so much and had the extra time and energy, we went into work early to deposit Easter eggs with little notes or candy in coworker’s desks in the middle of August? We could get so much more out of life with the proper stimulation and stress-free lifestyles.