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November 15, 2005
Postponed Grievance Meeting
Tonight I'm really sad. Monday we were supposed to have a meeting to resolve the problem at work with my boss but they postponed it until Wednesday. I have a sinking feeling in my gut that this bully is going to not only get away with it but attack me with everything he can think of. I don't know what to expect. It is fear yes. I know how this man can lie and believe his lies and how he treats other people. So tomorrow I feel like the good old boys club will protect the manager and I'll be on the fast track to losing my job. Tomorrow morning at 10:00am I'll be in a meeting and we'll see what happens. Right now I feel sick to my stomach. My biggest challenge right now is how to love a man like this. He will get nasty I feel. How do I love this man? Maybe standing up to a bully and not letting him get away with it is a way of showing love? Life is not easy. It's easy to love the ones that are loveable. Everyone can do that. But not so easy to love the jerks. I don't want to see him lose his job either, which I don't think will happen in this case because management will protect him, but I do want him to change. Is this unreasonable to want? I want him to treat other human beings with respect. Is that unreasonable to want? One thing that makes me sick is by bosses almost joyous persona today, almost gloating. He was unusually happy and light. He must think that he doesn't have to worry at all and that he has me where he wants me. I don't know what to expect now. Unless he's in denial or told not to worry by management. Probably a little of both. He's going to try to sling mud, but I'm not going to play along. I don't wish this on anyone. Good luck on your future careers. Some people do not make very loving choices toward other people. That brings me back to how do I love a man like this? By having courage, seeing this through and finding a way to help him? Maybe I will only make a difference after he's gotten rid of me and he's old and has a chance to think about his life. Maybe he'll remember all the lives he's damaged. Who knows. Right now it's not easy for me. I'm going to go to bed early, read and get a good night's rest.
Tomorrow night I'll be at the bike shop and then write my blog entry when I get home. Maybe I'll be looking for a new job soon. We'll see.
Posted by carl1236 at November 15, 2005 07:20 PM | Attitude
Comments
I've always told my wife the way to love someone is to tell them the truth, especially when its about something important even if they don't want to hear it. In that I think you are doing a good thing and i hope it works out well for you.
Posted by: Eric at November 16, 2005 07:24 PM
Thanks Eric. The meeting today was very one-sided and he lied in the meeting. He's trying to save himself now by lying. And Management is either protecting him or believing him.
We'll see what happens. Thanks for your wise words though. It does help me put things back into perpsective.
Posted by: John at November 16, 2005 09:19 PM