November 16, 2005
I don't think change is possible if we are in denial. If we are in denial of having anything to do with the problems we are creating. For my part, I am choosing to stand up for a whole department of bullied employees. But it will cost me I think because our management is protecting the bully. Today's meeting was very one sided like they had wrongdoing or part in the problems in our department. My boss sat there and lied and told the management representative that I walked out of a meeting with him and was unwilling to work with him. I couldn't believe it! He's creating a hostile environment that's intimidating and he's using his position to get me fired.
Anyway, I can only tell the truth and eventually, since he's in denial, he'll screw up again and there will be no-one to save him. He's had 3 anger related problems in the past and still management protects him and believes his lies. And what makes matters worse his this man claims to be a Christian. Not very Christ-like. This is the problem of the centuries that Jesus spoke out against. And they hung him on a cross, putting his brutalized body on display and shoved a spear in his side. "What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul?" Or in this case, gains the miniture kingdom. I don't think abusive people see their own abusive behaviors. Change cannot happen until they do. Change won't happen here either because he's being protected and won't have to face his own problems and attitudes.
I will probably be looking for a new job eventually. I don't think I'll lose this one, but I don't think I can stick it out in this environment with an abusive, lying boss. I might be a little distressed about this, because overall I love what I'm doing and love the other people I'm working with. I get along great with other people in the organization too so that helps. I cannot see the future in this one because I'm not clear on where to go or what to do. I know I can only tell the truth and hope for someone to listen and believe what's really going on. I don't really believe that it will do anything to change an abusive manager though in this case. So I'm still trying to figure out what to do.
Life is very difficult sometimes. But maybe new opportunities will present themselves. I have to be more aware of those opening up. And I pray I am never so blinded by my own power that I abuse people and don't realize it.
Posted by carl1236 at November 16, 2005 9:57 PM | CHANGE
Sorry to hear about the way things are going for you at work. At least things are looking up in your volunteer career, eh? Good luck with defusing the situation with your boss or else finding a new job where you don't have to put up with abuse. You are right, sometimes in a bad situation there is no solution and the best thing we can do is to get out of it. See you on Monday (this time for real, I promise).
Posted by: Sui Generis at November 18, 2005 9:39 AM