Live Alive

Category "Love your Neighbor"

March 17, 2008

Boycotting the Olympics

I am boycotting everything to do with the olympics in China. I won't even watch it on TV. When it comes to Tibet, China is a typical bully who took something by force and claims the victim is the terrorist.
So, basically I think the Chinese government has no real character. They are hollow and full of lies. Let them pretend to others that can't see what they have done.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:57 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 19, 2007

Someone else is wearing my skin

It feels kind of weird. Like someone else is wearing my skin without me there. I hope they do something really cool in it. Maybe something good even; And not commit a crime or do something obscene. I hope they don't damage my skin.
But mostly I hope they have fun in it. I hope it transforms them like it did me.
I loaned out my skin at this particular time of year, because,
I haven't felt much like being me. It's gone unused for a few years and I kind of liked the idea of the magic of usefulness coming back in it.
So I loaned it out and then, almost as an afterthought, I asked for pictures. I want to see what I did while on loan to someone else.
So, we'll see what happens. After Christmas I'll post the photos here.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:05 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

February 09, 2007

It's not that I'm open minded, but...

I am not closed-minded. It's different now. I'm not so closed minded that I cannot see the forest through the trees. I'm not so closed minded that I can hate and still call it love. It's different now. It came over me slowly, and all of a sudden I realized that I am not the same person now as I used to be. I remember being someone who bashed gay people, for instance, but somewhere along the line, I stopped needing to do that. I also used to reject other religions. I stopped needing to do that. I don't remember when and can't pinpoint any exact moment or incident that made me change. But I no longer reject other people like I used to. I am also not as insecure as I used to be. I remember how insecure I was. But that is not who I am now. It is different now. I don't exactly remember why I was so insecure, but I was. I guess you could call me open minded. But really I feel like it's not the open-mindedness that matters, but the 'not-being-close-minded' that does. So closed-minded that I could not see how to love other people like I want to be loved. I realized at some point, that I do not have to agree with other people and more importantly, that I don't need them to agree with me. Well, guess what, I have an open mind and my brain did not fall out! Mainly because I stopped having a closed, needy, controlling mind and started listening to my heart. I don't exactly know when it happened. But I'm thankful that it did.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:24 PM | Comments (1) | Attitude | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

January 31, 2007

The answer is not always what we think

Yesterday and today I was meditating on a challenge I am going through and a very loving solution was presented. So, now I will work on it with the others I'm working with. Easily things could have spiralled downward and out. Anger between coworkers creates walls, and walls create fear and fear destroys from the inside out. So, the best solution is one based in love and understanding.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:37 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

January 04, 2007

I need friends

I get notifications from a few "meetup groups", which I signed up for recently. This is a cool concept, connecting people with like interests. This particular softare sends notices of new members who recently signed up. When you sign up you state why you joined the meetup group. Today I got a notice about a new member. By chance maybe, it was one of my friends. His reason for joining? "I need friends."
Good reason for meeting up with others.

Posted by carl1236 at 08:45 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 22, 2006

Co-writing a book, aka, working with others

Whenever considering a joint venture with other people it's a good idea to see what you are getting into first. But unfortunately much of the wisdom we need in working with other people is hidden from us until we experience the interaction between our self and the other person. I have a plan, the seeds of which have been planted many years ago, and fertilized by Sui Generis and other friends who write, and inspiration from the successes of many other authors. I don't just want to write a book, I want to co-write a book with another person. So this year I am gong to make it happen. It doesn't really when or if it is even published. But writing it willl be a lifetime experience. To do it together will be an experience in closeness of the mind and heart. How do you generate an atmosphere of collaboration and mutual support and love?
The fun is in the struggle.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:09 PM | Comments (2) | Attitude | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Life"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 18, 2006

The experience of giving a haircut for free.

Today I gave a haircut to a friend, using my Wald haircutting equipment which I bought to give myself haircuts. After giving myself enough haircuts to pay for the clippers, I decided it would be fun to share the wealth with others. So a long time ago I made an offer to give haircuts for free. It was kind of a funny, quirky thing to do, but I did it. No one took me up on the offer until recently though when my neigbor and then my friend Eric decided to do it. Haha, this one was an easy job though because he has short hair like me and just needed a cleanup. Thanks for the great evening Eric! That was fun hanging out and chatting and having dinner and talking bikes, computers and food stuff.
Now that makes haircut number two for someone other than myself. Anyone else want a free haircut? I'm sharing my wealth. Come on. It's free. Actuallly, it was really fun to touch base with Eric and see what he was up to and to just chat. Life can be fun and interesting when we treat each other well and with respect.

For reference here are my orignal posts concerning my haircutting adventures:
http://blog.lib.umn.edu/carl1236/dailyspirit/026911.html
http://blog.lib.umn.edu/carl1236/dailyspirit/056335.html

Posted by carl1236 at 09:19 PM | Comments (1) | Attitude | Life | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

Category "Winter-Biking"

November 08, 2006

Bicycling Mayhem

Well, it's not winter yet, according to the current weather conditions, but it was cold for the last few weeks. I've seen a lot of people still out riding their bikes to and from school or work, in the dark, like me. It's been interesting doing about a 26-mile round trip three or four days per week. I'm starting to get used to it now and it's not a struggle. But yesterday and today were really bad bicycling days. Drivers have forgotten how to drive. Yesterday I got hit by a car that was zooming around the right side of some left-turning cars. It spun me around and bent my rear fender in so it was rubbing on my back wheel. With a hefty amount of force, I yanked it back out and my wheel was no worse for the wear. But it did shake me up quite a bit. I continued my ride to work and got a flat tire. The culprit was some kind of a weird hooked spike thing that penetrated deep into my tire. I patched it up in about ten minutes and was on my way again. Luckily it was fairly warm outside to do that in comfort.
Then today I was yelled at, spit at, had a young person fly through a stop sign nearly hitting me, without even seeing me and had something thrown at me which struck the back of my neck. It's odd to me that all of these cases were in Roseville and all three of them were driving big gas-hog vehicles: An SUV, a full-sized conversion van, a king-cab type pickup truck and a huge old boat-style car. Oh the power that gives to harrass bicyclists! They must feel so big in those things. Then tonight I heard about a friend who was sitting waiting for a stoplight to change and the car driver behind her was laying into the horn, yelling, "Get on the sidewalk!" and cussing. Evidently they were in a hurry and wanted to make a right turn. That made my friend more adamant about waiting for the light. She had a good point. It wasn't a right turn only lane and if there was a car there going straight, the driver behind would have just waited their turn. Nothing can be done about it when it's a car in the way, but if it's a bicycle then it's fair to harrass the driver waiting to go straight, right? Is this any way to treat fellow human beings? Come on people, is the extra few minutes gained from driving around recklessly worth a human life?
I put more reflectors on my bike tonight hoping to be a little more visible, but given the drivers out there, I think that's a false sense of security. Reflectors won't help their driving skills or their love for other people.
If you are in a car here are some lessons:

DON'T SPEED AROUND THE RIGHT SIDE OF CARS TURNING LEFT. JUST WAIT UNTIL YOU CAN BE SURE THERE ARE NO BIKES OR CARS ALSO TURNING LEFT COMING ACROSS IN FRONT OF YOU.

DO STOP FULLY AT STOP SIGNS AND ACTUALLY LOOK BOTH WAYS SO YOU DON'T RUN OVER A PEDESTRIAN OR BICYCLIST.

DON'T YELL AT BICYCLISTS OR SPIT AT THEM OR THROW THINGS AT THEM.

REMEMBER THAT IF A CAR HITS A BICYCLIST IT COULD KILL THEM. IF A BIKE HITS A CAR, THE CAR MIGHT SUSTAIN A DENT. THERE IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE IN THE AMOUNT OF DAMAGE A CAR CAN DO TO PEOPLE VS. THE AMOUNT OF DAMAGE A PERSON CAN DO TO A CAR, OR IT'S DRIVER. HUMAN LIFE SHOIULD HAVE MORE VALUE TO YOU. WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO PROVE? THAT YOU CAN KILL? GOOD FOR YOU. WAS IT WORTH IT? SLOW DOWN, PAY ATTENTION, TREAT HUMAN LIVES WITH MORE RESPECT. OH, AND SLOW DOWN. LIFE IS SHORT ENOUGH WITHOUT HURRYING THROUGH IT AS FAST AS WE CAN.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:16 PM | Comments (3) | Love your Neighbor | Winter-Biking

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 04, 2006

The disturbing news about being "Liberal"

It's sad how political ads are using the term "Liberal" as a smear word. As if it's bad to be "Liberal." It's sad that people think it's bad to give to others, even if it's expensive and it hurts our accumulation of wealth. We have some serious problems in our society and the answer is not to give less. We should be giving until it hurts. Until there is no human being left behind. Anywhere on the planet. The answer is not to cut the funding from social programs for the cause of putting more money in the pockets of the wealthy. It doesn't make a very compelling argument to do that and say at the same time how compassionate we are. But then again, compassion is a sign of weakness when it comes to wealthbuilding. It's so easy to not be compassionate for others in less fortunate situations when we are the ones who have. Try going without, putting yourself in their shoes for a week, month, year, a lifetime and see how you fare. Most people who have everything would not give it all up to do such a thing, because well, they have, and don't want to give it up. Yes, it's important to give to the less fortunate. Even if it hurts. It's the compassionate thing to do. If that makes a person bad I'd hate to be the alternative.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:45 PM | Comments (1) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

October 19, 2006

When does Karma take effect?

I believe it's not some ultimate retribution we face, but a little-by-little erosion of our humanity. We do get what we give and we give according to our humanity. When we can no longer love each other, we are essentially blind and empty.

Posted by carl1236 at 08:15 PM | Comments (0) | Attitude | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

October 13, 2006

Now that I have "Captcha" installed...

I can now tell the difference between human and 'inhuman.' for instance... Today was my last day of work at my previous company. I turned in my ID badge and said all of my goodbyes.
My boss left early today and as he was going out the door, he spotted me and came over to me. I shook his hand and he told me "good luck on your new job. I wish the best for you." I felt like telling him HE is the reason I'm leaving. He is really clueless I think. OR maybe he feels guilty. Then he gave me hug! I almost withdrew, like backing away from him. A hug? what was that? This is the guy who went out of his way to punish me because I stood up for one of my coworkers.
I hugged him and told him I look forward to a new working relationship with him. I don't know, I just felt he felt sorry for everything but didn't know how to express it. Somehow he felt he needed to hug me. So I did. And he left. I spent the next several hours at work wrapping up my work, packing up my few remaining things and left quietly. no fanfare. Just turned my badge in at the front desk.
Everyone makes mistakes and everyone deserves a chance to change. It doesn't mean I will support abusive behavior, but I can spot a human being when I see one. Now that I have captcha installed I think it's easier. ;-)
And since my blog has been inundated with spam, which I remove almost daily whether I post an entry or not, I'm happy I am entering a new phase in life.
Anger must be replaced with forgiveness and with compassion. At some level I know that I cannot hold a grudge and I cannot hate other human beings for their faults. Otherwise I would hate myself too. So a hug is a good thing.
Regardless of the reason I am leaving my job for another one, I have a new adventure in front of me. And I left an opening to recognize a fellow human being and find a way to love instead of hate. Maybe leaving on these terms will be a catalyst for change.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:11 PM | Comments (2) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

October 12, 2006

Free Haircut

Just over a year ago I made an offer to cut hair for free with my new Wald Hair Clipper with attachments. Nobody took me up on my offer until tonight! Today someone asked me if I would cut his hair and I did. I finally had the opportunity to make good on my offer! And it turned out ok. He was appreciative and thankful for the haircut.
I also learned a few things. For instance, now I know why barbers/hair stylists like to wash your hair first. It's nearly impossible to get a good even cut when hair is going in all directions, is oily or dirty. I started the haircut but then made him go wash it.
It was fun. Kind of like sculpting, haha. Not only have I saved a lot of money but now I got to save someone else some money. I am amazed that I have now been cutting my own hair for about a year and a half already! very nice.
Haircuts! Haircuts! Haircuts for free! Just send me an email and I'll happily hack it off, with style.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:23 PM | Comments (2) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Knowing God"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

September 30, 2006

Blessed are the peacemakers

God is Love. Sometimes I wonder at how easy it is to get so far away from God, and how quickly it happens. So far away from Loving other human beings. Many of our modern ideas about peacemaking don't get at the root of the problem. The root of the problem is a lack of love for each other. Which means a lack of God. We need the application of God. Blessed are the real peacemakers. The one's who love in the face of modern ideas that look more like hate than love. Maybe not so modern, but re-hashed, over and over the centuries. Ideas that look more like a lack of love than love. The bible says, "Blessed are the peacemakers..." because it's a good thing. It's how we love each other. That's God.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:26 PM | Comments (2) | Knowing God | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Life"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

September 26, 2006

Why do we need usless things like this?

One commenter on SENSELIST asked why we need museums like those listed here and called them useless. At some point there was a statement that implied these people don't have a "life." Haha, define "Life." Why do we have any kind of collecting? Many people can't see the point in stamp collecting or bug / butterfly collecting. I can see the point. Someone gets a fascination with something and becomes an expert on that one micro-facet of life. Isn't a museum some sort of collection, but open to the public? Art Musueum. There is certainly some really weird art in some of those collections. But it's still called art. Some whole art museums are dedicated to really weird art. I'm sure there is a Hocky museum and plenty of baseball museums around. What if I don't like baseball or hocky. I probably wouldn't go there. But If I did I'm sure it would be fascinating to me, because any kind of highly focused exhibit like in a museum is bound to go into way more depth than my general education would provide about these subjects. One commenter pointed out that it was definately worth 20 minutes of his time to visit the "antique washing machine museum."
I thought it was interesting that while almost all of the other commenters were jumping in with names of other museums they thought were weird, one commenter felt it necessary to critizice the need for these museums and critize the people involved in them. It's not exactly a loving attitude toward other people who have found something fascinating to occupy their time. It seems to me they are living life they way they wish. Aren't they?
Hey, Andy, Wilbur, did you see comment number 30? There is a Mushroom museum in the U.S!

Posted by carl1236 at 10:13 PM | Comments (0) | Attitude | Life | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

August 22, 2006

President Bush is straining the psyche of our country.

President Bush is straining the psyche of our country. He talks about our country losing it's soul if we don't support people who want to live in freedom, but our country has already lost it's soul as we use power and control over other human beings for personal financial gain. Our government uses words like this to convince you that you are not patriotic or don't love freedom or you have no soul if you don't support their decisions and actions. Does President Bush really LOVE the Iraqi people? Does he really LOVE The Lebanese? His answer is more
military power. It's because he doesn't really understand what love is. President Bush is about as Christ-like as a terrorist. President Bush is straining the psyche of our country, not his war in Iraq.

Posted by carl1236 at 12:26 AM | Comments (1) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

August 19, 2006

Fifty things I want the world to know - 2

2. Whenever we think we are better than someone else because of our skills, brain, muscle, talent, position, etc. we are already rotting flesh with propultion, moving around flapping our lips, gone from the inside out. Except we cannot smell the stench yet. If we make it long enough , we have an accident or get older and have kidney problems, or cancer or lose our hearing, we will smell it. As we are forced out of our career and livelihood by a younger, more talented, more beautiful, stronger, better connnected, faster person, we will smell it. It's good not to treat other people like the rotting flesh, plugging our noses when we are the ones who stink. Is there a more repugnant smell than treating someone else like shit? If we are somehow better, just wait a while, we'll be no different, but by then we'll have wasted our opportunity to love another human being. We'll have wasted our gifts by hoarding. When we look at other human beings, it's good to be humble.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:24 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

August 16, 2006

Fifty things I want the world to know

1. I want the world to know that people count. People may not seem equal in skills or talent, but each person has an equal value. If we cannot see that value, we are the one's who are lacking.

Posted by carl1236 at 07:34 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

August 15, 2006

Hit and Run

Yesterday my dogs made a way through the fence and escaped. They went on a little neighborhood tour. My daughter discovered they were gone almost right away and started driving around the neighborhood to find them. She was about four blocks from our house when she saw one of the dogs so she pulled up and called out to her. She didn't come at first, but then when my daughter opened up the door she ran and jumped in. Then my daughter saw the other dog, laying in the boulevard whimpering. He couldn't walk and he was in a lot of pain.
Well, the looked him over and determined that he was hit by a car. His hip was dislocated and he had bruises all over. The vet reset it, but it's all bandaged up and difficult to tell yet if it will heal or if it will pop out again. I'm hoping it will heal. We'll know in about a week I think.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:05 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

August 11, 2006

Doing good things

It's good to do good just because it's good. We don't need to have an alterior motive or wait for something to gain if we have a mind to do good.

Posted by carl1236 at 07:08 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

August 05, 2006

How will you see me?

How will I see you? I keep looking into your eyes, listening to your cries, hearing what I've already heard. Seeing what I've already seen.
So how can I see you, for who you are until I can be what you see in me? I'm trying my friend.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:26 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Bicycles"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

June 04, 2006

The Scrapper

My life gets kind of interesting sometimes. I go down paths I never would have imagined traveling when I was younger or even just a few years ago. In the last few years I've had many opportunities to go WAY beyond my known boundaries and limits, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I have learned to love people and respect people that I would have judged and condemned in the past.
Recently I've met Lester the Scrapper. He makes his living by scrapping metals such as steel and aluminum. Our meeting came about because we at the bike shop are being forced to change our mode of operation. We used to scrap our own metal. We recycled bicycles that were in too rough of shape or too junky to repair and salvaged parts that could be used on other bikes for repair. We had a huge pile of steel outside of the shop and when we got over 500 pounds of it we could go turn it in for cash at the recycling company. 500 pounds is the minimum they wanted to deal with and would only pay you for loads over that amount. General we made about 30-50 dollars per load, depending on the price of steel. Aluminum is more valuable and break that down into smaller pieces and save it in bins until we turn it in for the cash. We have to save the parts for reuse anyway, so scrapping the old steel is another source of revenue to help pay the shop rent.
But since the new condo owners all around the bike shop started complaining about a salvage operation in their backyards, we were forced out of the scrapping business. It was too unsightly. So for us it was a great deal to just give the steel to a small-time scrapper who made his living by scrapping metals. These people are feeding off the bottom and providing a vital resource recovery function in our society of waste. I know a couple of these guys now and both of them are receiving the same kind of scorn and pressure from neighbors who don't like scrapping operations going on in their neighborhoods. It's a messy business by nature. It's junk collecting. It's the collecting of other peoples refuse, saving the good stuff and recycling the rest. It's amazing what people throw away! Someone made a comment the other day that scrapping is like being a catcher at the pooper end of the consumer lifestyle. People around the neighborhood like the idea of cheap repairs and cheap recycled bicycles, but don't realize that those are made possible because we RE-USE parts that come off old-discarded bikes. So at the bike shop we still do the scrapping, but we no longer make any money from it. We have Lester pick up the scrap weekly. We tear the stuff down, save the good parts, make a smaller pile in the shop, which we don't really have the room for, then Lester comes and gets free steel which he then adds to his other steel to make money. It's a great relationship given our circumstances and our need to "clean up our act," so to speak.
But now Lester is facing the same problem in his neighborhood. He has a junk-pile yard and the city is forcing him to clean it up, which basically will mean he cannot do his sorting and recycling operations on that property anymore. This is where I came into the picture of this story. This is where it's heading. Today I became a substitute scrapper. Lester came to us at the bike shop and asked if we could take the load of bikes he had in the back of his pickup truck because he had to clean it out of his yard or get fined by the city who was inspecting the following day. We were already overwhelmed with piles of bikes at the shop and had no room. We are under strict rules to not have any junk outside anymore. So we had to turn Lester away from the shop. But I felt sorry for Lester and his situation. I like helping the underdog who is being forced to "clean up their act so they are socially acceptable." Lester is one of the nicest men I know and trying to make an honest living off of everyone elses crap. Except society tells him, you can't do that in my neighborhood, it's too messy! haha. So I told Lester to drop it in my driveway and I would strip it down and take the rubber off the wheels and call him when he can pick it up again. So that's what I did today after I got home from the shop. I started with a pile of crap in my driveway and ended up with two good lightweight-steel frames which I will turn into custom-painted fixed-gears. I also extracted some other valuable parts from wrecked frames. I sorted and restacked the steel. So now I call lester to come back and get his steel. Today I was the scrapping operation. It took a lot of time to do this. Is it worth it? According to my day job pay scale, no, it hardly scratches the surface of what I could be making doing something like computer programming or web design or software training. Scrapping for money is not a high-profit business for small operations. It is something to do. And it's kind of fun tearing things apart and fun making new things that work out of junk. It feels good to know that some of this refuse will be put back into use and the steel will eventually get reused instead of coming out of the ground.
My day was very interesting and I learned a lot about bikes and how they go together by taking them apart. I also did a little research on the couple of parts I pulled out for salvage. My scrapping day is over, but now I have to get the steel out of my driveway before the neighbors complain! I don't think Lester will complain that I took all the rubber of the wheels and made his pile more compact. I don't think Lester will complain that he was spared a citation because he was able to haul his pile to some other location while the inspectors were there. The pile in my driveway is probably worth 30 bucks to Lester which will probably pay for a few days worth of gas for him, or buy groceries for a week or something. So It's worth it to me to help him out when he's in a bind.
In our society I think we try to hide the ugly, unsightly aspects of our consumerism and we don't like to talk about the pooper end of our consumption. One of my neighbors was observing me today and said that when he was a kid and his bike broke, he didn't get a new bike, he had to find a way to fix it. When a frame bent or broke, someone in town welded it back together. There were other interesting fixes he told me about, but the point was that his bicycles did not get replaced when they became unsightly or damaged. They got fixed not disposed of. Now days, we dispose of things just because we want the newer model, even if the old is still useable and in good condition.
And we push people like Lester out of the scrapping business because of the unsightliness of it all. Don't poop in MY neighborhood! MY Property Value will be Lower! Lester is a beautiful person. He is kind and gentle and friendly. What is the value of his life and livelihood? Does it mean less than appearances? This is our society, we make these kinds of choices all the time.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:31 PM | Comments (2) | Bicycles | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

May 27, 2006

Two_hundred_points_for_stopping

I was riding my bike home from the bike shop last night, shortly before
the rain came, and I saw this man rummaging through some stuff with his
bike leaned up against a low-concrete-divider wall. I almost rode on by
but was compelled to turn around and see if he needed help with his
bike. He didn't. What looked to like a problem with his bike was
really Terry Mack stopped to untangle the cables of his CD-Player
headset. He thanked me and told me I get 200 points for stopping
though. He said that most people would go right by and not care whether
someone needed help or not. Then he told the story about what happened
a few weeks ago to him. He was walking along the sidewalk on West
Seventh and a very drunk man was lying in the middle of the street, face
up, not moving. In all appearances, he looked dead, and in practicality
he was dead to the world and oblivious to where he was. Terry witnessed
car after car drive around the man. One even honked but kept driving.
So Terry went out into the street as fast as he could and found the man
still alive, but reeking of alcohol. Terry shook him and the man kind
of snapped out of it, looked up at Terry and said, "Do you got a
cigarette?"
Somehow Terry got him out of the street so he wouldn't get killed.
What shocked me is that out of a dozen or so people that drove around
the man lying in the middle of the road, not a single person stopped to
render aid. Terry told me, "This is not the world I enrolled in."
And I had to agree. I'm happy to have met a man like Terry Mack. It
reminds me that yes, it's still good to pay attention to those around
us and render aid when we see someone in trouble. This is the world I
enrolled in.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:42 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

April 24, 2006

The new cubicle

Today I moved into my new cubicle at work. Here is what I discovered:

1. I like a brand new environment. Sure there are problems with the design and layout that I think were a result of poor planning, but overall the new environment is refreshing.

2. My cubicle is directly across from my boss and I can hear every word he says, and I imagine that he can hear every word I say. I discovered today how frustrated my boss is. I heard him cursing himself over and over about the amount of 'crap' he had, and mumbling how "I haven't made any progress at all!" He was obvioulsy agitated and frustrated and upset. Unpacking for him was very stressful.

3. It was a good thing that I spent so much time and effort purging all the old, outdated stuff in my office before moving. Today I simply unpacked and filed everything in it's place. It was cool.

4. Our whole division is now on one floor, instead of several. I like this because many of the people I work with are now much closer. This is a good thing.

5. Even though our office is only two blocks away from our old office, it feels like it's in a better location for bicycling. One of the major streets coming south toward our new office has a bike lane and I rode it twice today and it was very convenient. I liked that. I also like that our new building has quicker access to the skyway system. We are not connected to it, but the entrance is only about 15 feet from our front door.

6. I am more organized in the new space than the old. Mainly because I had a chance to plan how I was going to arrange my cubicle before moving in. Moving was a great opportunity to rethink how I was doing things. Some of the things I was doing was because that's the way my predecessor was doing it. For example, my file cabinets were already labeled and contained past information. I redid the whole filing system in my new office.

Well, anyway, it's hard for me to be angry at my boss when I overheard him being so angry and down on himself. I did not have a chance to see this side of him before. Before all I experienced was his anger at others. So I consider myself fortunate. Today was a good day.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:56 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

April 15, 2006

A wonderful, exciting, full bike day

I have to tell you, it is very interesting dealing with different personalities. There are some people that should not be 'in control' of things. There was another incident this morning, but with a different person. So, when I later talked to the others who were involved, the story was way different than I heard originally. Anyway, finally I got the whole story and not a skewed alternative version and I feel much better and less concerned.
Then today I went to the TCBC Swap meet and sat at a table talking to people. It was really cool. Then after the swap meet I went back to the bike shop and it got really busy. So I got sucked into working the register. I was very busy for about an hour, then I had to go, but it was ok.
Overall it was a great day. The main lesson for me today was in 'how I talked to other people.' Real communication can get muddled when we are not sharing all of the information with each other or when we put our own agendas ahead of the other person's needs.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:56 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

April 13, 2006

Design Flaws

Are there design flaws in other people? I think it's an attitude we have that prohibits us from seeing the true, beautiful design of each individual.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:03 PM | Comments (2) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

April 08, 2006

Consider Supporting My Friend Terry Sainio

Terry needs help raising money for a good cause and he has a good heart. Please consider giving support to terry. He's a long way from reaching his goal. Check out his reasons for riding in the Red Ribbon Ride:

http://www.redribbonride.org/site/TR?px=1077203&pg=personal&fr_id=1050

On top of all of his other issues, Terry is one of the greatest volunteers I've ever seen. He shows up for others. Please show up for him and make a difference in his life. I am supporting Terry.

Posted by carl1236 at 12:10 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

April 06, 2006

A nice night relaxing and talking

Tonight I had a great chat with a friend. Even though we were closed, I opened up the bike shop for someone to work on his bike. I sat there and stripped down a few bikes for scrapping while he built up his radical touring bike, all the while talking about life, bikes and the bike shop. And what made tonight extra special is that it was pouring-down rain outside. It was just the two of us working on bikes and talking with the sound of the rain outside, flashes of lightning and Peace inside.
This is a point I never really understood in life until the past few years. There are many people effected by the effect we have on just one person. We don't have to love the whole world at once. We have to love one person beyond the whole world. This is also called the ripple effect. One drop of water on a still pond sends out ripples in all directions moving great amounts of water, creating movement far out. I would assume that the size and distance of the ripples is directly proportionate to the velocity and force of the one drop as it hits the pond. The love we show one other person uses the same ratio. Except unlike a ripple in one direction outward, Love has the effect of also sending ripples inward. The power and force of loving another person flows both ways!

Then on top of all the great things that happened tonight, I got to ride home in a beautiful rain that felt so cool and refreshing and exhilarating! I can't beleive what I would have missed had I not opened up the bike shop tonight for this one person! And to make things better, I got to ride alongside him half-way home as he was riding the bike he just built. It was a great night that I feel has led me to a deeper understanding of another human being and made us better friends.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:38 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

March 30, 2006

stalemate

In chess this is when neither side can win. Each side can move around, back and forth, but neither can Kill the opponent. There can be no clear victory for either side. Part of the problem with life sometimes is we think we are in a stalemate with an opponent. Too often our own arrogance and pride backs us into a corner, unable to get away, unable to solve the problem, unable to find solutions. There should never be a stalemate in real life, because we have minds and hearts and can reason and compromise. We can love each other instead of fight each other. If we are not fighting each other, then we can work out a solution do our differences. Pride and arrogance are often too tough to get by. But not impossible.

Posted by carl1236 at 07:01 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

March 27, 2006

Abusivesness is not a good theology

Being abusive toward our more vulnerable members of society is not a good theology to have. No matter how right we think we are, there is no justification in mistreating other human beings.
Due to an incident on Saturday, Today we lost two vulnerable volunteers who we were working with and two customers who overheard what was going on. They turned around and left. Thankfully the person who lost their temper was not our staff or a board member. That still won't bring our two volunteers back. Tonight they told me they no longer feel safe in our environment.
I tell you, regardless of how smart you think you are, no matter what your IQ or vast amount of knowledge, it's pretty ignorant to treat people by swearing and yelling at them. There are better ways of doing things. Now I have to clean up the mess and try to repair the damage done. Don't have a theology of hatred and anger. It's not a good theology. It sucks to be at the receiving end of that theology. Theology is our beliefs in action; how we live our beliefs.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:24 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

March 13, 2006

Melvin's New Pedal

Finally I got to give Melvin a new pedal!!! Saturday he came into the shop for something else and I noticed he STILL did not have a pedal on his bike. I offered him a free pedal and he didn't want to take one. So as he was chatting with one of the other guys, I went and dug out a matching pedal. It took me about 15 minutes to find a right pedal that matched his other pedal, but I found one that did not have a mate. I brought it out and instead of arguing with him, I told him I needed to see if it fit, and then proceeded to put it on for him. He said, "Oh that's what you were doing back there!" then he laughed and said thank you. I told him I had to do it. I last saw him on January 10th I believe and he's been riding around like that since then!!! Melvin is one cool dude! And I finally got to give him a pedal!

Posted by carl1236 at 08:00 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

March 12, 2006

Heart to Heart Talks

I've had a couple heart-to-heart talks lately, one with a friend and one with another friend and another with my wife. Sometimes we need this kind of long, unubstructed, uninterupted, honest talk to get to some real meaning. Often we hold things inside and don't ever get to the feelings we really want to express. But taking some time alone with another person and really being honest and open with another person and with ourselves, is important and valuable in life. It can deepen our relationships and our love for each other. If there is a conflict we can work it out. It can also increase our understanding and appreciation of another person. So I'm thankful for the opportunity to chat with my friends and wife in this way.

Posted by carl1236 at 08:15 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

March 08, 2006

A hug

A hug has many forms, not just a physical act of puttting our arms around someone and squeezing. It is a rare case when people in our modern society really reach out and embrace another human being. Ther is no reservation or alterior motives in a hug; just a genuine happiness and acceptance of each other. Today was a hug day. When we have the opportunity to give hugs and we do it, it is a good day in life.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:50 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

February 12, 2006

Sometimes I don't know If I'm making a difference

I sometimes feel so helpless when it comes to the problems of other people. My natural tendency is to want to help solve the problem. I care about people and don't like to see people suffer. But I can't always do or say anything that helps. But I may not always know the impact I have on others. I just told that to a friend tonight. She may not know how she effects other people or what choices they will make because of her interactions with them. I was trying to help her feel better about her friendships with some other people she knows. But I'm in the same boat. I don't always know. If we are lucky we see and know we are making a difference. I'd like to say I always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but I can't. But maybe it's not the result that really matters, but the process of going through the tunnel that makes the difference.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:56 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

February 09, 2006

House of Flying Daggers

I don't really care for movies that have sad endings. The man who said he loved Mai, killed her twice. The man who really loved her had her die in his arms. I'm not buying it. In our world there are too many people willing to kill the people they love, proving they don't really love them. If they really loved them they would not kill them. They would rather kill themselves than kill the person they love. Because to love someone is also to want them to be happy. Do you want your children to be happy? Or your mom? Of course. Even if we lose our love, we gain by our love being happy. If it were not so, it would be possession. If we possess what we love, we have already lost, because it is not free like the wind. In holding on to the wind, it slips between our fingers. We cannot possess the wind. In possessing the wind we are thinking of our own happiness, not the happiness of the wind. And the wind dies at our hands. Is this love?
As the dagger flew, we see that Mai lost her life because of someone else's greed and pride. He would have rather seen her dead than with someone else. So he killed her. He could have walked away. It's tough for an ego to do that, but he could have given her life instead. Instead he killed her. Where is the love in that?

Posted by carl1236 at 01:25 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

January 22, 2006

Fuk the Photograph Smile

Today I was reminded of the Julian Lennon Song, Photograph Smile. I went to see my old Russian friends who I met 5-1/2 years ago when they first arrived in this country. For the last few years we've been meeting only once per year around the New Year. He told me that once per year was not enough. He needs a friend in this country. Yes, he's right. I had basically sent them a photograph of me smiling and waving goodbye when what they really wanted was a friend to share their lives with.
yeah, in all my relationships, I want you not the photographs with perfect smiles.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:37 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Knowing God"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

January 10, 2006

The sudden urge

Tonight at about 7pm or so, I was riding my bike through downtown St. Paul on my way home. I was just passing by an intersection and the Aroma's Cafe sign caught my eye. I've seen it before, but never had the need to stop in. Tonight however I had this sudden and urgent urge to take a detour and stop in for a treat. This coffee shop is not right on the corner and I couldn't see in from where I pulled up to the stop sign, so I didn't know why I was being 'pulled' in that direction. I parked my bike and looked in the window and to my wonder and surprise I saw my friend Kurt! I haven't seen him since November I think. So I parked my bike and went in and said hi. I ended up staying and eating a bite and having some coffee. We really enjoyed talking and made plans to meet again next week on Tuesday in the same place to play some chess and watch some student films they'll be showing.
Then when I began my journey home again, I was feeling pretty good. I was happy. But as I was passing the street where my bus runs, I felt this huge pull to go to the main bus stop and see when my bus came. It's several blocks out of my way, so I had to make a concerted effort to go that way. I kept telling myself that it would be a pain going back up the hill from that location, but I did it anyway. There at the bus stop I saw my friend Melvin with his bike. His bike was missing a pedal but he was riding it all over like that! I told him to stop by the bikeshop for a new pedal. He was happy to see me, and I was happy to see him. I ended up riding the bus home just to keep talking with him a little longer. Melvin's a good guy. We made plans that he would come into the bike shop on Saturday for a new pedal. Both times tonight I had this sudden urge to detour out of my normal course. I listened and it was amazing. It was totally worth it! Oh the mysterious, amazing thing this life is.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:59 PM | Comments (0) | Attitude | Knowing God | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

January 04, 2006

Resolving problems

Tonight at the bike shop one man became frustrated with his brakes and began yelling at us and calling us names. He had reached his limit and his frustration was overwhelming. So I talked to him, and asked him how his broken brakes were our fault. He said it wasn't our fault his brakes were broken. Then I asked him if it was his fault his brakes were broken, and he said no. Then we talked about how frustrating it was and that I understood that. But at the same time, he could not take out his frustrations on us. In the end, he got his way by having someone drop what they were doing and fixing it for him. But sometimes, things become overwhelming and we just need relief from it. Like this man and his brakes. He told me that he would have thrown the whole bike outside over the railing if he didn't get it fixed, that's how frustrating it was for him. So, Dave fixed his bike in about 20 minutes and he was happy and had brakes again. And he apologized for taking out his frustration on us and we shook hands. Then I rode through downtown with him and another guy on the way home. You know, I really understand frustration, and I don't know anyone who likes to be the receiving end of it. We cannot take out our frustrations on other people. And it's helpful to try to see the source of frustration in other people. Usually there is a good reason for their frustration and it's a start in finding a solution. But first we have to be willing to face the insults, see beyond them and hear what the diffulties are. I think sometimes we cannot resolve some problems with other people, but sometimes we can. But we must be willing to hear and listen. I'm glad we shook hands and made up and rode off together.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:36 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 24, 2005

Running into Mr. L.

Tonight it was so strange I saw Mr. L. at my church for the Christmas Eve service. I haven't seen him in probably a year! I met Mr. L. in a coffee shop downtown and that was the circle I knew him from. That's the only place I've seen him. And now here he was at my church. It turns out he has a neice that goes to our church and they were having a special function afterward, so they went to church together. It was cool. I went over to him and talked to him and told him how happy I was to see him after so long. I don't think he was expecting to know anyone else at our church but I made sure to give him a warm welcome and hello. It really was good to see him.

Good night to all, and to all a good night. Merry Christmas. God bless.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:27 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 21, 2005

A Positive Word goes a long way and it doesn't hurt to throw in a pen

Today I was talking to a friend who told me a story about a pen. She was working as a cashier at a busy store and there was this old man who came through her line. He was a little crabby and short with her. She tried to make pleasant talk, but he wasn't very helpful. When the transaction was rung up, he was going to write a check but couldn't find his pen so asked to use one. She handed him a pen and said, 'sure.' As he was writing the check and signing his name she noticed how nice his handwriting was. After he signed the check he mentioned how nice her pen was and asked where she got it. She said she got it at Target and then she complimented him on his nice handwriting. The ice was broken. Then as he was handing the pen back, she told him to keep the pen. She said she thought handwriting like that deserves a good pen. He was astounded, thanked her over and over and smiled from ear to ear. He walked out with a pen and smile. Here is a person who can see the beauty in other people. It's a good thing for everyone. It turned a person having a rough day into a smiling, happy one and there is great beauty in that. My friend is an "Everyday Hero" for whom there is seldom praise. So here is some appreciation. Thank you for being you.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:16 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 20, 2005

What a kind act will do for morale

Today one of my coworkers brought in a pair of old ski goggles that he's not using for me to use while biking in the winter. He remembered a conversation we had about someone I knew who was using ski goggles and thought I'd like to try them. I was excited and I did wear them home tonight and yes, they do work as long as I can keep my breath going out of my ski mask instead of getting trapped inside. But the ventilated goggles clear up pretty fast with the ventilation on the sides and my eyes don't water up from the wind.
We all know how good it feels to have someone think of us and do something special for us. It feels great and it lifts our mood up doesn't it? It's a good way to treat others. Most of the time it doesn't cost us anything at all except giving someone the time of day.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:59 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 17, 2005

What is Good for you.

What is really important in life? In today's New York Times there was an article about two people who developed a serious-life-threatening illness, one was a VP of sales for a company and one was a school teacher. The VP of sales received a lot of support from his company and the school teacher was basically screwed. The article talked about how health insurance in our country is mainly tied to our jobs and when we become seriously ill, we need our health insurance the most, yet many people lose their jobs and their insurance. Something has to be done about this. We can see all over our country how the decision makers in companies are pushing more of the healthcare costs onto their employees. The author of the article in today's paper, Lisa Belkin quoted Robin Bond, who runs an employment law firm in Wayne, Pa., and represents individuals with claims against employees. Robin Bond brought up a significant point about the nature and purpose of a business: To make money. She said, "But no law changes the basic fact that employers want to do what's good for business. Their job is not necessarily to do what is good for you."
Yet, how can we say we love our neighbors if we are only looking at the bottom line. Most American Companies are driven by profits. A new wave of Co-ops are cropping up because some people do get it. It's more important to benefit the employees than just to make money. But my guess is that even co-ops have to do what is good for the co-ops eventually or the co-op goes out of business, at the expense of a member who can no-longer function as a member. But I think it's a better idea than what many businesses offer it's employees.
And then we think deeper about this...
She said, "Their job is not necessarily to do what is good for you." Who is they she refers to? Every company is run by people. I contend that a company isn't real at all. It's and illusion that we create and only has life if there are members of the company. In other words, people have to make the decisions at a company. Human beings have to animate it and make it's decisions. Every person's job is to do what is good for others. If we are in charge of a company, we are torn between making money for ourselves and taking care of our employees needs. People making decisions in a company are still human beings and should do what is good for other human beings. It's a tough road to walk. We can't blame companies, because they are inanimate. WE are responsible for how we treat others in work and outside of work.
People run companies. People do jobs in companies. People make decisions in companies. People are responsible for making the company comply with our spirits verses making our spirits comply with the company. What is really important in life?

Posted by carl1236 at 09:59 PM | Comments (2) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 13, 2005

Absurdity and Audacity

Frankly, some people will not 'get it' until they are put in a position of being ridiculed and driven down. Bullies are bullies and always justify their position by attacking others. Make others look bad to make themselves look better. Tonight at the board meeting two members showed their true colors. While one sat their and ridiculed what's been going on in the shop and what's been done, the other one sat there saying, "Just pay me and I'll fix it." The first one said that our shop drives people away because of the 'clutter' and mess. But he's so oblivious to his own attitudes to realize that the whole organization is in crisis because he drove away all of the board members and volunteers. His personality is so abrasive and controlling that he can't see the problems are his not the shop. Rot starts at the top. And he has the audacity to blame others, while taking credit for saving the organization, when he really drove it to the brink of extinction over the past few years. I've talked to three former board members now who say they left because of the current president. Is this insanity or what? I'm not trying to tear people down, I'm just expressing my frustration over what I stepped into. I've only been actively involved since early summer, and more so in the fall. What I look forward to in January is a cooperative, team-oriented, rational board that is not in it for their own egos, and don't throw temper tantrums. I still see a lot of potential in this organization, but not the way it's been run in the past. Again, it's not the shop's fault, because the shop kept the organization alive. The Shop Manager and all the volunteers kept it alive. Without it, there would be no organization!
Tonight's board meeting was a huge energy drain. The real meeting happened after the two bullies left. A lot was planned and accomplished with rational discussion and actually looking at the shop and making some informed decisions. Let's not drive people away with our bully attitudes. There are always better ways to handle things. Being a jerk is not the way to love your neighbor.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:50 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 11, 2005

Nobody Cares About Me So Why Should I?

One of the strangest things in this world is the idea that we are ever alone. We can be surrounded by people, insects and animals, have God in and all around us, and still feel like we are alone. Isn't this wierd? One thing that God has been trying to tell us since the beginning of our existence, is that we are not alone. We all want to be loved yet we are afraid to share our love with others. We isolate ourselves from others and God. When we are a baby we begin the process of separation from others. As we strive for our independence we go overboard and lose sight of the fact that we are all co-dependent in life. We cannot do anything without effecting someone else. We cannot exist without God and each other. With God and all of these billions of people around, isn't it strange that we feel alone? Isn't it strange that we don't feel loved?
I read in the paper recently that when the european astronauts first went into space they were thinking very much about their identities such as German or British or French, but as soon as they saw the globe they thought, wow, we are all on that spaceship called earth. When Earth is seen from a distance with a backdrop of infinite space, we realize just how much we are all in this together. Hey, if we destroy that planet, then it will effect everyone! If we deplete the natural resources, it will effect everyone! If we pollute the planet so we can't breathe it will effect everyone! If we treat each other poorly everyone on the planet suffers. It's because we are all in this together and we are not alone.
When we feel alone and unloved, we are missing something we crave and need. We are missing it. We wish we had it. As strange as it sounds to feel unloved and alone surrounded by billions of people, isn't it stranger yet when we attack ourselves and sabotage ourselves because of it? When we don't feel loved by others we often don't love ourselves. Let's see, it goes something like this, "No-one cares anyways, so I might as well get messed up!" or "My parents don't care if I'm home anyways, so why should I?" or "Nobody likes me, I'm stupid and ugly! It's not even worth living." Stange isn't it? Not only do we feel unloved by others, but we turn against ourself. The logic is illogical: I feel alone and unloved by others so I'm going to isolate and not love myself! That'll show them! That'll fix them! But it doesn't fix anything, it just makes my condition worse. I not only still feel alone and unloved, but I also hurt myself.
When we are feeling unloved and alone, doesn't it make better sense to love ourselves? If we are all alone and we are all we've got, then wouldn't at least loving ourselves be something? Why should I care when nobody else does? Because it's healthy. Because it's good for me. Because it helps instead of destroying me. That's why I should care.
Now the flip side of this is when we can see or feel the need of another soul to be loved and connected, given that we are all in this life together and what effects one person effects everyone, isn't it in our best interest to love and connect with that person? That can be as simple as saying hello and aknowledging their presence. Of course it could also mean we have to go way beyond our current comfort level. I cannot even count how many times I have went beyond my own comfort level with other human beings! Hearing a soul's need is like walking by a car wreck; we have to stop and make sure everyone is ok and offer our assistence. That may mean getting the proper person, like a paramedic involved as soon as possible. When giving CPR the very first step is to always call for help! While the ambulence is on the way we start pumping the chest and listening for breaths until we are relieved of that duty. Yes it's our duty to help souls in need! If there is someone reaching out for love and acceptance, there is a reason. That person is missing something. Therefore we are missing something.
Love yourself like you want others to love you. Then love others like you love yourself. Love others like you want others to love you. Love yourself like you want others to love theirselves.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:16 PM | Comments (9) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 09, 2005

Are you ashamed of Jesus?

"Are you 'ashamed' of Jesus? Then why don't you 'tell' people how they can be saved?" For anyone who has this mentality toward others, I tell you this, "Don't sell the bearskin before you've killed the bear."

Posted by carl1236 at 11:25 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 04, 2005

Christian?

The President cannot be 'Christ-like' and consider torture acceptable treatment of human beings. In the name of power and control, I bow down my soul to the power that controls. This is who I am, this is Christlike? More like those who nailed Christ to the cross.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:36 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

December 03, 2005

When Tragedy Strikes a Family

I don't know what to say. I just heard that a very good friend of mine had a terrible tragedy in their family. She had her Mother-and-Father-in-law visiting for the holidays. Yesterday they were driving on the highway and were in a terrible accident and both of them died. Evidently the killer was filled with road rage and ran them off the road. I'm praying for my friend, her husband who lost his mom and dad, for their children who are now missing one set of grandparents and for all of the relatives who now have to deal with such a tragedy during the holidays when everyone's spirits are high and full of thoughts of giving. Instead they are feeling a great loss. It's tough at any time of year. There is no replacement mom and dad. But when the family sits down and opens gifts this Christmas there will be some presents there that will make them cry when they open them. The receivers won't have a chance to say thank you.
When will people get their priorities straight and slow down, have a little patience and control their rage? Life is way too short to be so ignorant and unloving toward other people. Road rage is so unneccessary and in this case, deadly.
I can not say anything to my friend that will help their family through this tough time. All I can say is "I love you and hope you make it through this. It'll be rough for a while so hang in there! I'll keep praying for all of you." When tragedy of this scale strikes we can just be there for each other.

Posted by carl1236 at 06:07 PM | Comments (1) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 27, 2005

The work I love to do

This is really the key to success. Success is defined in many ways depending on our perspective. Success doesn't necessarily equate to money. I've been in the same field since 1989. But it is not really the technical or computer stuff I love about it. It is working with people; teaching, enabling, empowering people to be able to solve problems and help themselves. The work I love to do is really tied to helping people succeed. When I'm not doing that, I'm not really happy with the tasks I'm doing. It's meaningless. I am at a crossroads now, deciding how I can best do the work that I love to do. What is the best use of my gifts, talents and resources? I don't know what form it will take yet, but some change is coming.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:42 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

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November 25, 2005

A Thai Chi moment

It's kind of funny, but through a misunderstanding, and the kindness of a coworker, I received a Thai Chi movie. He thought I was studying Chinese Mandarin and thought about me when he was in San Francisco and bought it. I'm studying mainly Korean, but the thought was very kind. And I watched the movie Wednesday night and really enjoyed it. The characters were using a fighting style of Thai-Chi, but covered both 'soft' and 'hard' techniques. And they really showed some of the aspects of Chi. For instance when one person repulsed 4 attackers at once with a 'push' from the center, or full of energy.
One thing this movie brought up is that the original Thai Chi was very spiritual and not just a fighting technique. It was more about not 'attacking' or 'resisting' but allowing the opponents forces to go through and be their own downfall. In a sense, the opponents' energy is turned against themselves.
Another cool thing they showed in the movie was the idea of conserving our own energy and using it most efficiently. This is a challenge in life sometimes. I still find myself expending energy in places that have little effect and not enough energy in other places where needed. But all things work out, I just could be more efficient with the use of my gifts, talents and resources.
The third thing I got out of this movie was repeated over and over in the movie. Many people in the movie criticized the star because he wouldn't fight the 'enemy' even after he brutalized and hurt many people. They said things like, "You studied martial arts for over 10 years and you won't use it. What good is it!!!??" The word 'tolerate' kept flashing in his mind (and on the screen). Part of the training in Thai Chi is tolerance and not to use force just because we can. The idea of tolerance is not to think of people as enemies and kill them but to use only the force necessary to deflect and dissolve their negative energy. I think 'tolerate' does not mean 'don't stand up for yourself and others,' but to use wisdom and understanding when dealing with other people. Sometimes there are many root causes to people acting out against others that we do not see. Many times it is some kind of fear that they have. Force does not resolve that fear.
I think I could have changed my situation at work before it happened if I had practiced Thai Chi and was thoughtful of these things.
I see in the past I have not learned true tolerance. It doesn't mean tolerate cruelty or abusive behaviour, but it does mean to tolerate the human being and understand where the aggression and force is coming from and find a solution that heals both parties. They are not our enemies, but friends that have not learned to love yet, and the best way to get someone to love you is by loving them, not beating them to a pulp. Using force against force is not good because what we resist, persists. It has to persist because our force requires an anti-force. So the Thai Chi lesson is really a lesson in how to love other people.
Another way to look at Thai Chi is the health and strength it brings us, which makes us strong in body and mind, keeps us centered on what is important and able to handle the challenges that come against us regardless of what those forces are.
More tolerance is actually more involvement in other peoples lives and getting to know them. That's an interesting and challenging practice to follow sometimes. It requires us to use our energy for good instead of resisting the forces of others. Thank you Craig for the movie and the timing of it. In this Thai-chi moment I understand something I did not before.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:19 AM | Comments (1) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 23, 2005

Is it ok to hate people that do bad things?

Today I heard an interesting view on this. She said it was unnatural and unreal to hide our hate for someone who does bad things. Because if we hate them, and admit that we hate them, then we can also forgive them. Without hating them we don't have anything to forgive. I can kind of see her point. Of course we don't want to carry hate for a person around with us forever either, because that's not good for us. Admitting that we hate someone who did something bad allows us to forgive them and move on with life.
Becaue of my abusive boss, I've been thinking about this a lot lately. How do we love someone who is abusive? Or in the case of the man from Wisconsin who raped and cut up a young female reporter in his salvage yard, how do we love him when he commits crimes so horrible that we cannot even stand the sight of him? To the victim's family, this man is pure evil. They probably hate him and what he did. How could they forgive him, ever?
I believe now that to love someone that does evil or bad things, we should follow a code of "hate the actions, love the person." Yes, I hate the actions of my boss. He lies, is abusive and is petty, controlling and intimidating. I hate what he does to the people around me and to myself. No I don't really hate my boss, but I do hate what he's doing.
So, one way to love my boss is to not let him get away with the actions I hate. We should not let abusive people continue their abusive behaviours. I don't really want to hate my boss either. It's not healthy or a solution to the problems. But I also don't like what he's doing to me or my coworkers. I think I will be able to forgive my boss and already have in a way. I do feel bad that he is oblivious to the pain he is causing his employees. I can love this man and still hate his actions and attitudes.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:23 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Bicycles"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 20, 2005

Can you fix my bike, for free?

This morning I spent some time at the coffee shop reading the paper and talking to some people I've met there before. There is this one man who comes in regularly but I haven't been around there much in the past few months so we haven't talked in a while. The last time we talked I was seriously training on my bike and would stop by the coffee shop after my rides. He was looking for a bike then, but I wasn't really involved in the shop much at that time. Today he told me he got one for free because he was helping someone move and they were going to throw it out. He asked them if he could have it and they said, "Sure!" Then he told me that the back wheel was off and the back part of the frame was bent. hmmm. Maybe free is not so good. But it's a dumpster bike and he rescued it from the heap. Then he asked me if I could fix it. I said yes. Then he asked if I could fix it for free. I know this man is on a limited budget and has limited means, so I took a deep breath and then said, "yes." But then I added that it would have to be after Thanksgiving. So I have a free repair to do at the end of the week. He said he was inspired by me riding my bike so he wanted to use his to run short errands and not use his pickup truck so much. His truck is an old rust-bucket that probably doesn't get too great of mpg. So, anyway, I'm happy to try to fix his bike, but if the frame is bent, I'll have to help him pick out a different bike. Maybe he could help me reorganize the shop (or continue what I started a few months ago) to earn a bike.

On other bike news. my dumpster bike is sitting idle right now. I bought an old brown Schwinn Suburban to replace the one that was stolen from me a while ago. I love that bike! It's a such a smooth riding, comfort commuter bike, the cadilac of street machines. It's long and tall and has full fenders, 10 speeds, rack AND a generator light and taillight set! This one is a 1973 instead of a 1971 like my old one. So I'll use that bike for commuting when there is no bad snow on the ground, otherwise my dumpster bike is getting 27" knobby tires. That's a Schwinn Continental. I went out and bought new bulbs for it today since last night they both burned out. I rode over to Minneapolis to Spokes Pizza to deliver a couple of parts to someone there and about a mile-into my ride, the taillight burnt out. Then a block later the headlight went out. Good thing I had my backup systems with me. I found the bulbs at my local Ace Hardware, so I was happy to be able to give them some business.
Now I'm set. But I'm accumulating too many bikes. It's so easy to do though! Especially since they are such a convenient and useful mode of transportation.
Anyway, I'm happy to help my acquaintance from the coffee shop get going on a bike. There is no reason he can't be out riding that two blocks to the store instead of firing up that gas burner.

Posted by carl1236 at 04:36 PM | Comments (0) | Bicycles | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 19, 2005

Bicycles and Pedestrians

I got to experience something very interesting and fun again today as I was riding my bike to the bike shop. I pulled up to a crosswalk at a red light and a man was walking by in front of me. He turned and looked at me and I said, "Good morning!" He was genuinely startled, then then he managed a head nod before turning and walking faster. I guess he wasn't used to having traffic talk to him. I don't know. We were the only two people around and the streets were pretty quiet. Maybe he was lost in his thoughts when I spoke to him. I sometimes forget when I'm on a bike that I do have a voice and can speak to people. Have you ever only nodded or felt speachless when someone talks to you while you are on your bike? How about in the skyway? In skyways people go out of their way to avoid eye contact or make conversation. Anyway, I think there is something very nice about bicycle riders and pedestrians talking. It's a very humane way to live. It's not isolated or shut off from the outside world and each other. It's very close and personal.
It's a new, brave way to live. I like it. And just saying 'hello' out loud is a step in that direction.

Posted by carl1236 at 08:57 PM | Comments (4) | Attitude | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 14, 2005

Human lives at work

If you really love your neighbor as yourself then you are not seperate from that love just because you are at work. There is no seperation of Church and State when it comes to doing God's will, which is to Love God and Love your fellow human beings. There is no room for greed or selfishnish or building our own little kingdoms in this equation. We cannot pretend to be good in Church on the weekends or evenings then go to work and treat others like they are property, as less than equal, or having less 'value.' Many people think the focus and purpose of this life is to 'get what we can out of it,' no matter what it does to others. Life at work should be no different than life at home. How we treat others is just as important at work as anywhere else, including church. What does it profit us if we gain control of the sandbox and lose our soul?

Posted by carl1236 at 11:49 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 13, 2005

Gertrude Stein Reads Franz Kafka

I know what I know because it is all that I know. I know that Franz Kafka wrote a story called Metamorphosis. I know that because I have read it. I can know that I know that because I have read it. I read it and I know it. It is all that I know because I know it. I have heard this story before before. I heard it before I have read it. I knew it before I knew it.
The story is about Gregor Samsa, a traveling salesman. A traveling salesman who turns into a Dung Beetle, an insect. An insect that is repulsive to his own family. A traveling salesman that is repulsive to his own family. A Dung Beetle is evidently repulsive. I know that it is repulsive to some people because I have seen how they react to large insects. It is repulsive because they are huge insects and cling to you when they get on your clothing or hair. I know this freaks people out because I’ve been freaked out before. It is something I can relate to. I knew it before I read it. Now I have read it and know that I know it. Repulsive. I know.
Gregor lived with his parents and sister. His parents and sister were poor and Gregor took care of them. His parents and sister were poor because Gregor took care of them. Gregor made sure they knew they were poor. And made sure they knew he took care of them. They knew they were poor because they were told they were poor. They knew they could not take care of themselves. Gregor took care of them because they could not care for themselves. They knew this. Gregor knew that they knew this. That is why they could not take care of themselves and they knew it.
When Gregor became an insect and no longer took care of his family, his family took care of themselves. They took care of themselves because they had to. They took care of Gregor. Gregor was living off the labor of the poor. The poor family who could not take care of themselves but now could. They could take care of themselves but were told they could not. They could not because they knew they could not. But now they knew they could. Without Gregor. This was liberating. Oh, I know it’s liberating because it’s liberating to be free of a Lord of great self-importance. Gregor was a Lord of great self-importance who lorded it over his family. He lorded it like a great benefactor who’s only purpose in life was to lord it over them. They knew this because Gregor told them. Gregor told them because he was an insect. Then he became a real insect and could no longer take care of them. And they took care of themselves because they knew they could. They knew they could after after. After Gregor no longer could and after they knew Gregor no longer could, they could.
After Gregor died, and he died of starvation because he wasn’t eating, they moved away from the house Gregor had chosen for them. The Father, Mother and sister all moved away into a smaller, more affordable house that they knew they could afford. They managed their own affairs at that point and they knew they were able to care for themselves because they were doing it. They knew it. The insect was dead and they knew it and were liberated.
There is a good story in here, I know it. I have heard it before I read it. I know it because I have heard it and I have read it. I know it because I have met insects like this. I have met insects like Gregor and know how they are being insects even while they don’t know they are insects. When they know they are insects then they know they have been insects are being insects and they die. The insects die as insects. I know it. They know it. But it is too late to take back the metamorphosis. They are already insects and are used to it. They are used to being insects and don’t know how to transform back. They don’t know how because they are used to being insects and know it. We know it. We know it before they know it. They do not know we know it before they know it, until they know it and it’s too late to know it. Then they know it and we know it. Know what an insect is and know it before becoming one. Know it because you don't want to be one. Know it before before. Know it before becoming and before we know it. It's better to see one than to be one and know it. Do you know it.

Thank you Gertrude Stein (1874-1946) for the interesting review of “Metamorphosis” by Franz Kafka, (1883 –1924). Stop by anytime Gertrude, it was fun. Hehe.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:25 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

November 11, 2005

People are not really evil, but we do make bad choices

This is a difficult topic for many people. Good verses Evil is almost always spoken of in terms of 'opposites.' But instead of labeling actions as evil, we tend to think that a person capable of actions that are evil is really an evil person. An evil person can be judged and condemned for 'being' evil. Being is a state of existence. The problem with evil as a state of existence is that it precludes any act of love. Many people that do evil things also love and want to be loved. So it is not the case that we are one or the other. We can however make bad choice.

Posted by carl1236 at 03:25 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

Category "ZINE"

October 31, 2005

Writing about Life

Words about life tend to be like photo snapshots of life. I like writing. But sometimes I feel that words written down on a page are not real. They especially don't feel alive anymore once put out there to read. I think it's because words, just like a snapshot can never show the entire picture. There is so much to life that to begin to describe it is to fail to describe the rest of it.
When I have an experience and write about it, there are hundreds more experiences I am not writing about.
This is one reason why it's so important to not judge other people based on one impression, or even two impressions, or three. This is why it's important to get to know people before coming to any conclusions. We often discover that the 'other person' really is just another human being trying to figure out life, just like we are.
When I sit down and write about a situation, it is also just one situation out of many that might be going on in my life or someone else's. It's not a complete picture. I can pick out one bad event each day for two weeks and complain about them in my blog entries and it would seem like I've had a horrible two weeks but still go home each day and watch movies, work in the garden, play with my dog, eat great meals with my family, read a good book, write and have all kinds of wonderful experiences. A snapshot is not nearly lifelike, though it may be a good picture of a moment in time.
Today I was looking through old blog entries I've written, trying to pick out a few good ones to rework into my next issue of the "Attitudes" Zine. I'm looking for things that might be interesting to read that convey a sense of purpose in life, of love and hope. Then I realized that many of the things that I've written about seem empty and hollow when I am so distant from the experience that prompted the writing. I believe it's because once I put the words down, they are no longer alive. This is kind of the meaning of the 'Living Word of God.' God's words are life and love and hope in practice. We put the words to paper and it's a snapshot of the real thing. Our love for each other cannot be in word only. It has to be in action. This is the living word that is not hollow and empty. Because it's life, not just writing about a part of life.
I don't have anything magical or insightful or full of wisdom to teach anyone that they don't already know about life. For one thing I cannot live life for another person and their experiences are not going to be the same as mine. But I can tell you that your experiences are as real as mine. I love life and love other people. That's who I am. To me that is very hopeful. I like this part of my life.
When I went to the movie the other night with Tom, that was equally interesting to me as the movie itself. I didn't write too much about my experience with Tom mainly because I have limited time and can't write about everything that happens in a day. But to me it was equally important part of my day and maybe more meaningful than the movie. For instance when we saw the part of the movie where the kids were being abandonded and abused, Tom started growling. No kidding. I asked him what was wrong. He was just reacting to the movie in that way and was feeling the impact of what was going on. It was deeply effecting him. He was reacting in a very primal way. At other times he was lost by the movie, and it meant nothing to him. Tom lives in a tent and only has a few posessions. He gets around by bicycle or bus. He doesn't even have a driver's licence. Tom may have a rough exterior but I know his heart is in the right place when it comes to abuse. His heart growls in displeasure and it escapes through his lips. My words about the movie almost meant nothing compared to Tom's reaction at that moment. Living life and experiences it is much more real and vivid than any words can be. It's like that with the living word also. We can say whatever we want and even mean it, but living the words is so much more real and vivid. Alive.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:01 PM | Comments (1) | Love your Neighbor | ZINE

Category "Love your Neighbor"

Feeling down

Right now a few of my friends are feeling a little down. I even get that way sometimes and it seems that nothing is helpful, especially someone else telling us it'll be ok. Sometimes just being a friend and listening is all we can do. I found this little bit of 'Old Irish words of encouragement' that David posted on another blog. We are never as alone as we feel sometimes:

May you see God's light on the path ahead
When the road you walk is dark.
May you always hear,
Even in your hour of sorrow,
The gentle singing of the lark.
When times are hard may hardness
Never turn your heart to stone,
May you always remember
when the shadows fall—
You do not walk alone

To all my internet friends who are feeling kind of down right now...

Virtual Hug >:-)< Real Love.

Posted by carl1236 at 04:55 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Attitude"

Category "Love your Neighbor"

October 20, 2005

Bikes as a Second Language (BSL)

Sometimes inspiration comes to us in a chain of events or encounters. On the Bike ship, we were sailing along doing things as usual. I have a good friend who owns a Duplex in St. Paul that he was rennovating. He lives in the upstairs and now rents out the downstairs. When he was looking for tenants to occupy his duplex the Hmong refugees were just arriving from Thailand to this country. Someone talked him into renting to these new immigrants. As a community service I fixed up and donated six bikes to the children of this family a week after they arrived. This was great but then the other refugees wanted bikes. My friend put together a list of ten more people who wanted bikes, but we didn't have the supply of used bikes to give to them at the time. I've been collecting the shorter bikes for them in the shop.
Then I met my hero Dot the teacher, who teaches English for Hmong immigrants. She had been buying bikes at garage sales and giving them to her 'English as a Second Language, or ESL' students. (They call it something else now, but I forget what.) But most of those bikes were in need of repair. One day Dot showed up at our shop with two bikes, asking if we'd fix one if she donated the other to us. I said ok and she was ecstatic. So now she gave me a list of bikes she needs for students and she's bringing me tall bikes in exchange for shorter bikes. haha. It's a cool community relationship.
But then I was talking with my friend about some of the other people and the bikes they wanted and how it would be great if they not only got bikes but learned how to fix them. I've been working on curriculum for our earn-a-bike program from material I downloaded from 'Bikes-Not-Bombs' and thought this would be a great opportunity to practice teaching it. So tonight is the grand opening of our new "Bikes as a Second Language Program (BSL)" I made up some handouts with language tips related to bikes. This will be fun! They will learn to fix bikes, improve their english, work on our bikes and earn adn fix one of their own!!! Inspiration is even cooler when it's put into action. We have four students and two instructors. Tonight is fixing flats. Thursday nights are gold now!

Posted by carl1236 at 04:58 PM | Comments (0) | Attitude | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

October 16, 2005

No play tonight

Tonight I gave up my ticket to the play at the Walker Art Center. I was on my way to the bike shop to pick up my headlight I left there, then planning on going to the play in Minneapolis, but as I was riding through downtown St. Paul, a few blocks from the shop, I saw some kids stranded with their bmx bikes. I brought them over to the bike shop and let them use the tools to fix the broken chain. It was cool, and they thought it was cool and they were happy. But it took too long, and I had only fifteen minutes before the play started. No way could I ride to MPLS in fifteen minutes and pick up my ticket. I didn't want to arrive late so I skipped it. I ended up cleaning for a little while, then going home. I must really love my neighbor when I do stuff like this. Actually I was happy to help them but felt really sad that I missed the play. It's a contradiction between what I wanted and what was good for others. I could have blown them off, but then I would have missed a great opportunity to connect with these kids. Who knows if I will ever see them again, but it was worth it. I'll get over my sadness at missing the play. That's human nature I think. I do love my fellow human beings more than my own entertainment. I guess this was an opportunity for me to experience that.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:37 PM | Comments (7) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

Sidewalk Riders and Dumpster Divers

This weekend was the St. Paul Art Crawl. Besides displaying artwork and helping my daughter and her friends get into their display space, we had an open-house at the bike shop. I'd say about 50 people who had never been there came in to chat and see what our community bike shop was all about. Everybody was really positive and in a good mood.
Because of a chain of events, I was busy the whole time and dead tired until about 9:30am this morning when I got up. Haha, it's hard to be a morning person when you don't get in until 3:00am! I'll probably need a nap this afternoon too, but I'm going to resist.
Today I have to go clean up from the art showing then tonight I'm going to see a play at the Walker, so it should be a good day.
Last night the Art Crawl officially ended at 6pm, but there was a special event going on next door at the club so I hung around and saw that. There was a fund-raiser and preview of this movie about Urban Exploring, this group of people who go to unusual places and take photos. For instance down in the sewers and in the depths of abandoned munitions plants. The photos were cool and they talked about the adventure of trying to get these photos. They all were really good photographers and the film was well done.
Also, I kind of wanted to hang around to see how Terry and Tom did while driving the Pedal Taxis. They were running people around for the whole Art Crawl, plus at this party to drive people to and from their parking spots. It was cool. They had fun driving and made a little bit of cash. In this city it would not be a good way to make a living because I don't think it could generate enough income. Not bad though for a part-time gig.
About 1:30am they packed up the cabs and called it a night. Then we hang out and talked until about 2:00am. Tom and I rode together part of the way, since we were going the same general direction. First we stopped at SA to pick up something to eat. He bought a shrinkwrapped he-man sandwich, because he said it's the only one that had enough stuff on it. Evidently two of those can last him all night. But tonight he only bought one. I got two-hot dog for a buck special and a juice and we sat outside by the dumpsters eating. That's when Tom noticed the bag of food sitting next to the dumpster torn apart. He informed me that it was from dumpster divers getting something to eat. The station/store owner threw out the old food from the sales cases and someone had come to pick through it to find something they wanted to eat. The sandwiches and salads and other items were still all wrapped and all of them were in a white plastic garbage bag so it looked like it would make a feast, but I don't know. It seems if the store threw them out, they must have been past their expiration date and sitting outside in a dumpster unrefrigerated didn't apeal to me. Maybe if they got there right after the food was thrown in the dumpster. It's funny because I met a guy at the party who told me that he lives like that and never pays for food. He must know all the good spots to get thrown-out food. He looked pretty healthy to me. Now I had a visual refrerence for what it's like to dumpster dive for food, this white plastic bag laying on the pavement torn open, wrapped food spilling out and looking like a deli. We finished eating and then rode on.
I let Tom lead and he proceeded to ride up on the sidewalk downtown, on the left side of the road. This went against all that I know about how I should ride my bike. But I just followed and experienced night-time sidewalk riding. There was nobody out there besides us, we could have ridden our bikes down the center of the road, but both Terry and Tom like to ride on the sidewalk to avoid cars. In the dark it's especially interesting because you have to watch for obstacles like poles and building pillars and benches. And we were moving along at a pretty good clip, not even stopping for the red lights at intersections (there was nobody around) The rules for sidewalk riders are different. It's an attitude of not only owning the road but also any rideable surface. They must have gotten that from the skateboarders ;-) And Tom was very proficient at sidewalk riding.
We got to my turn-off and I headed home. Tonight I got to know Terry and Tom better. I also got to know a few other people while hanging out waiting for the end of the festivities. So it was a good night. Now it's time for coffee.
Have a great day!

Posted by carl1236 at 10:30 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

October 08, 2005

Distorted realities

Last night was very interesting. I didn't blog last night because I was gone until after midnight, then was too tired to try to write. I was spending the evening with three friends talking.
During our conversation I heard an interesting story about something that happened to one of them. He was mistreated once and the perpetrator had no clue what he did. Without going into details, my main lesson from this was this:

We can have attitudes about other people and distorted views, based on what we are trying to 'accomplish.' We can treat people like dirt when they don't fit into our plans and not even realize we are treating them like dirt. I see a lot of this going on these days.

Posted by carl1236 at 09:54 AM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

October 05, 2005

Raingatherer

Sometimes I feel inadequate when I see all the trouble in the world and I want to help. I want to make a difference. I used to think thoughts like, "Why doesn't someone do something about that?" But that someone is me, and you, and anyone else who cares. It is all of us enrolled in the school of life. We're ALL trying to figure it out. Though some claim to have all the answers, it's still a matter of faith and personal experience. I've said it before, No person can live for another person. We each eat, breath, feel, choose and think for ourselves.
We each do what we can. We have to. If we are blind and cannot see the troubles in this world, in our own backyards, we cannot help. But if we see something wrong, we are obligated to do something. We are guilty of walking by if we don't. It's very harsh, I know. But sometimes I see problems and know I am underqualified, unequipped for what I find. It can be overwhelming and sometimes disheartening. "Can't someone do something to help?" I'm often searching for the answer to the question, "What am I capable of doing right now?" Why can't it be easy. I guess if it were easy I would just do it. I would not bother working with other people and would trivialize it and probably pretty soon abandon helping at all. I guess if there is a struggle or challenge involved, then it's all the more worth doing. Lord have mercy on me, I'm really doing the best I can.
By myself I am a small rain gatherer, bringing water to those that are thirsty. One cup at a time. But together, we can bring a lot of water to a lot of thirsty people.

RAINGATHERER
by Franklin Brainard

I have said, "Dear God," under my breath a thousand times.
Rolling I have wrapped the thousand night sheets around the days
I could not reach, could not hold.
Each day is just beyond my fingers:
my madness, my family's madness, the world's.
Our Father have mercy on me
one of these the least of Your raingatherers.
In a world of earthenware I come with a paper cup.

Posted by carl1236 at 10:17 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

September 19, 2005

Do you know why I like you?

This one drunk guy started talking to me and said, "Do you know why I like you?" I looked at him, trying to figure out what he was going to say. He's an interesting character so one never knows. But he answered before I could respond. "Because you care more about people's feelings than what other people think about you." We'll yeah, I do care about people's feelings and no, I'm not too concerned about what other people think of me. I just keep doing my thing the best I know how. Then I had to give this guy a hug, because he wanted one. And no, he did not pickpocket me, because i don't carry anything in my pockets. But he felt better and when I left he said, "See you later. Have a good night." And I replied the same back to him. So that was the final event of the night and I'm glad he felt good about chatting with me and finding a buddy for a few minutes.
You know why I like you? Because you care about other people. Well that is one asset I feel is worth more than brains or money. The heart of it is how we treat others.

Posted by carl1236 at 11:34 PM | Comments (0) | Love your Neighbor

Category "Love your Neighbor"

September 08, 2005

What a waste!

I was sitting on a park bench watching the world go by. I observed a man smoking a cigarette. He seemed to be enjoying it. By my observations this man obviously had very little to his name. His clothes were ragged, his hair was sticking out in all directions, and he smelled. I could smell the smell of no showers, like I smell myself after a hard workout, followed by cooling off then working in the yard, followed by cooling off and repeatedly sweating. I’ve done it for a few days before with no shower. I smelled like this guy. But I could also smell his cigarette, which probably contributed to the smell of no showers.
Regardless, he seemed to be enjoying his cigarette, contemplating life and looking around. I wonder what his thoughts were. He was probably not wondering about me or why I was sitting on that bench watching people. Maybe he was thinking about when he would go take a shower and where. I like observing people because it reaffirms a lot of what I know about life. Then he finished his cigarette and left. I sat there for a half an hour and thought about this man a little, then he drifted out of my mind, like the smell of his cigarette eventually left my nostrils.
Then he was there again, lighting up another cigarette. I couldn’t believe it. I observed this man again, seemingly enjoying another cigarette. I thought, doesn’t this man know that it’s killing him? How smart can he be if he is willingly and deliberately killing himself!? And by the looks of him, he doesn’t need to be wasting his money on cigarettes when he obviously needs new clothes! Cigarettes are so expensive! I thought, “Doesn’t this man realize that he could buy a whole new wardrobe that didn’t have holes in it with the money he would save by not smoking!?” What a waste of money! That’s one reason I don’t smoke. It is a waste of money and a tool for self destruction. Smoking cigarettes is suicide and a waste of life and money that could be used for a better purpose.
As I was thinking these thoughts, it began to occur to me that I should say something to this man. His life depends on it. He is ignorant about life and needs my help. Obviously he could use new clothes and a shower and a place to live. If he would only make better choices, he could have all of that. Smoking is not a good choice in life and I thought it was important enough to let him know. It doesn’t help people to be soft on them. Sometimes they need to know the truth for their own good. So, I went over to him as he was stubbing out his cigarette in the dirt and told him how foolish smoking was. He just looked at me, like he was shocked that I was even talking to him. I don’t know what I was expecting for a response, but he could have said, “Fuck you!” by the look in his eyes. He just said, “yeah I know.” Then he went on with his business, leaving the cigarette butt on the ground. I wanted to tell him to come back and pick it up. Even after I pointed out the error in his ways, he created another error by leaving his poison on the ground to pollute the earth. Not only is he killing himself, wasting money better spent, but also destroying the environment that I share!
After he left I sat back down on my park bench and my eyes kept being drawn to that cigarette butt on the ground. It was a great focal point and kept reminding me of everything that the cigarette-smoking man was doing wrong and how I wished that only he would realize what was happening to him and to everyone around him that had to smell his smoke and look at his butt. I thought, “Next time I see this man, I’m going to have to be more forceful to get my point across.” He did not come back to the park though before I had to leave.
This did get me thinking though on how I could get people to realize how stupid and wasteful they are being. Their money would be better spent on health foods and clothing and other more important things. From now on, I’m g