Monday Music List - Reunion Shows I will not be attending

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Normally I stay away from and generally loathe reunion tours. But I do get the attraction. Bands love them because they get to re-live their glory years and make some nice coin, sometimes more than when they originally were recording and touring. Who knows, with enough Viagra they might even score a groupie or two along the way. Fans like the tours because they can relive their youth or those who were either not old enough or cool enough to see a band the first time around get to see and hear what the fuss was all about.

I guess I don’t need to experience things that I wasn’t part of. I don’t lament the fact that I never saw the Beatles or the Stones or Elvis live on stage just like I don’t mind that I didn’t experience V-E day or the golden spike for the trans-continental railway. Those events happened before my time and I’ve got to experience a lot myself like KISS’ Destroyer tour or Paul Westerberg singing Unsatisfied for the first time in public.

Having laid that out, here are five real and imagined rock and roll reunions I want no part of :

1. Nirvana featuring Courtney Love or Frances Bean Love. This would just be plain creepy. Also since Courtney Love is known to hate the other two guys in Nirvana, it would be obvious that they were in it solely for the money. A show like this would be my worst nightmare.

2. Public Enemy. Flavor Flav is just a clown now and they would probably film the whole thing for his next “reality show.? Plus given the fact that we are on the edge of electing a black president, some P.E.’s political songs have lost their punch.

3. Boston/Journey/Styx/Foreigner.
I know variations of this line-up has toured or is touring to this day and it just makes me sick. I hated these bands over 25 years ago why wouldn’t they be even worse now that each band member has 60 extra pounds, less hair (which wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing) and slower movements? If someone told me in 1983 that 25 years from now we would still be hearing Journey in public I probably would have rented room from Ted Kacszinsky.

4. The Who/Rolling Stones.
O.k. not officially a reunion as these bands have really never broken up and they even tour every couple of years but come on. Going through the motions so that you can sell $50 t-shirts and give someone the opportunity to see a band with their kid and grandkid is no reason to tour. Both bands’ legacies have been severely tarnished with their unwillingness to just stop and retire to the villa on St. Moritz. People need to realize that watching these bands from the 37th row of a dome stadium in 2008 is not the same as seeing them in a nightclub in 1968.

5. The Replacements. Loved the Mats. Saw them 50 times at least, both the good and bad shows during their hay day. But those last two albums were really bad and you can’t recreate drunken brilliance 25 years later. It’s just not possible.

So what about you? Any reunion shows you’ll be avoiding like the plague?

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Not really a reunion show, but after reading yesterday that AC/DC might sell their next album exclusively through Wal-Mart, I won't be attending one of their concerts anytime soon...

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This page contains a single entry by Freealonzo published on July 7, 2008 8:59 AM.

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