Random Top Ten Fiction


I gotta know Gary, is this a relationship or are you in it just for the sex she snapped as she tugged her jeans up over her hips. Jesus I thought, ain't it just like a woman, always playing the relationship card right after an afternoon quicky. "Sure Jen, it's all about you, you're my star of Bethlehem, my guiding force." Maybe I laid on a little thick as she rolled her eyes, snorted, struggled with her sweater and left. Hours later the empty bottle of Captain Morgan hadn't provided the anodyne I was looking for and the gravity of my life's forelorn existence begun to pull at my psyche. I thought to myself why I am such a jerk?

"Hot Burrito #1, chips, and a Corona, that'll be $12.50." I pulled out a crumpled twenty, gave her a wink, and said keep the change. The restaurant was empty so she sat across from me and coyly asked so how's it goin? I cut into my burrito and replied well some days are better than others, not sure how this one stacks up, yet. How's your day? She stared into my eyes, took a swig of my Corona and said business has sucked ever since the authorities quelled the riot on Sunset Strip, but other than that, I'm just waiting for a guy to sweep me off my feet.

Someone walked through the door and she offered up a salty salute, got up, and brought him a menu. It was decision time. Do I do what I always do? talk sweet and nice and make a play for the waitress? Jen always said I liked to collect bimbos, she would tell her friends "Gary makes it so easy -- he truly is the man who sailed. Around his soul are the broken hearts of young, attractive empty-headed girls who thought by sleeping with him they could somehow tame his wicked soul." I would laugh and say, I'm just lucky I guess. While the sadness in her eyes told me that she was describing herself. Now Jen was gone too. The waitress came back, sat down, finished my Corona and said c'mon sailor, whaddya say those waves become wings and you take me out of here? I smiled, shook my head and said sorry babe, I got the poor boy blues and shuffled off toward the door.


Nicely played with 'the man who sailed around his soul'.

You had some tough song titles this week, but the story holds together nicely, well done.

I do have a quibble with your use of "anodyne". I believe the word means 'to bring relief'. (Consider that to be written in red ink by a pedantic jerk.)

Actually, it was very nice, Free. Interesting little vignette--I can relate to the asshole.

Damn, E-6 you're right. I made a slight modification.


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This page contains a single entry by Freealonzo published on May 18, 2009 11:27 AM.

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