Tough Love vs. Tender Love

Research has shown that our childhood definitely affects who we are as a person, the decisions we make, and the values we keep. According to the attachment theory the parenting style of rejecting care leads to children growing up being unable to trust anyone. On the other extreme, those who were raised with a responsive caring style develop into very trusting people. Both parenting styles seem to bring about some very serious relationship problems.
However, from experience I believe that parenting styles are not the only factors. If someone who is very trusting at first and has multiple relationships with people who use him/her, treat him unfairly or in a cruel manner, then eventually that person will start to not trust people and ask more questions than before.
Tough love is not always bad. It can make some be more independent and aware of people out there that are not always trustworthy. However, too much tough love is not always effective because having no trust in anyone leads to a very difficult path with relationships. Both tough and tender loving is needed with children, but not to the extent to where it is inconsistent to the point that the child does not understand why his mom reacts differently each time the same situation occurs. Similar situations or events should induce the same love; either, tough or tender.