August 22, 2009
When everything changes
First, a little eye candy:
I was talking to someone the other day and mentioning how different things have been now that C has psoriatic arthritis. That's what he has, by the way, if I haven't mentioned it. It turns out that (thankfully) he does not have celiac disease, and whatever GI problems he has are related to the psoriatic arthritis. The medication he's taking seems to be helping that too.
Anyway, this person seemed surprised that things would seem different to me, so I explained. C is finally taking a drug for his psoriatic arthritis that is supposed to help, but it takes time to take effect. In the meantime, he has been taking either hydrocodone or oxycodone for the pain. They help quite a bit for the pain, but they have a host of undesirable side effects: irritability, agitation, and occasional bouts of irrationality.
In some ways, I feel like I have lost C to psoriatic arthritis. He spends a lot of time on the couch, he is often quite cranky, and he has developed a need to control lots of things that really don't need control. All of these things might have been there in C before but the psoriatic arthritis has brought them out ten-fold.
My old C might come back when the medication takes effect, but for now, I'm living with someone different, and I'm not sure how much I like it.
I think the person I was talking to was expecting that psoriatic arthritis is a little like having a mole or something. It's there, but it doesn't change you fundamentally. Maybe for some people disease doesn't change them fundamentally, but for others it does. Chronic pain is a nasty nasty thing, and I think that if you know someone in chronic pain you should expect that some how they are different than they were before they experienced pain.
I started going to meetings of the Well Spouse Association. This group meets to provide support to people who are married to people with a chronic illness. The types of illness may vary quite a bit, but it's surprising how much we have in common. I'm not going to say any more about this group due to confidentiality, but if you know someone who is living with a chronically ill spouse, this is a great organization.
It's going to hear the stories of others who have similar situations that made me realize this is not some surface level annoyance that will not impact my life. I suppose I can choose how much I let it impact me, but it doesn't feel like there's much choice when C is on the couch and refuses to budge when the baby cries.
This entry feels a little more intense than I intended it to. I'll try to write an update some time when it feels less intense. Thanks for reading!
August 7, 2009
That was Baby S on Valentine's Day, about a month after she was born. She was just starting to fit into her "newborn" clothes. Even though she was in the normal range when she was born (6 pounds 9 ounces), she lost a little weight. And, I don't think that baby clothes are really designed for babies on the smaller side of normal, anyway.
My sister said she'd never seen a baby so tiny. (not entirely true because she was there when another sister prematurely gave birth to her son, who weighed around 3 pounds at birth...but that was 20 some years ago) She said my baby had no butt to speak of.
Sorry for the blurry nature of this one, but I think it really shows of the length that this child sports. This is that same baby, who will be turning seven months old tomorrow. She's long and lean, and has shot straight out of those newborn clothes into clothing designed for year-old babies. She needs 'em--her legs are looooooooong!
Here she is, sitting in her bumbo seat. She loves that little seat, partly because the last thing she likes is to be lying on her back. Sitting up is what she wants because after all, she might miss something.
Sigrid has been learning to crawl. Some babies HATE tummy time, but Sigrid LOVES it! She has been working on her stealth commando crawl, but she's also mastering the full-on hands and knees crawling. I'm just relieved that she's not fast yet. She can get what she wants across the room, but not very fast.
All of this indicates that we might have a tall girl on our hands. We mentioned this to J the other day, and suggested that S might be taller than he will be when they are grown. A little while later, he told us he really wants to marry her some day. When asked why, he replied, "because she's going to be taller than I am, and then when we go shopping, she can get stuff down off the high shelf!" Sweet boy, your sister will be able to do that for you without marrying her! But it's nice to love, isn't it?