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March 22, 2010
the chance of being a real person
Almost three years ago, I wrote of our decision to send our son to a local Chinese immersion school. The school is a public school in the school choice state of Minnesota. I have always thought--and still think--that the school is an excellent school. Where I stand today, I see some areas that I hope they will improve in, but overall, it's a great school.
When our son started in the school, I wrote of my family's slow acceptance of our decision. I think their reluctance was due to the unfamiliarity of the idea of language immersion in general; I'm sure our choice of Chinese didn't help. I think their concerns were only slightly assuaged by the fact that J's best school chum's family comes from the same part of ND as I do. Overall, my family was slow to warm up, and mostly pretty silent on the issue.
When we decided to switch J to the neighborhood school, for a variety of reasons, some of which I've described here, we were a little uncertain about how to approach our families on the topic. So, we waited until one week of success, and then in an email, I wrote of our decision, that J needs to be able to express his ideas and that Chinese was slowing that down.
My dad's response came this morning:
Glad to hear J is out of Chinese school and has a shot at being a real person and that his new school isn't a long ways off.
Well, gee, dad. Tell me how you really feel, why don't ya? Upon reading this, my thoughts went straight to Carl, the family liaison at the Chinese school. He uses the phrase "heart-safe" to talk about our words and actions. I don't think my dad was thinking about being heart-safe here.
There's a lot of things I think about what my dad said here. I think maybe he doesn't really mean J didn't have a shot at being a "real" person before, that maybe he means he wasn't so sure of the relevance of Chinese? but wow....I'm just stunned that he somehow believed that and didn't share it before. I'm stunned that he could let those words flow from his fingers and not think for a minute that maybe there would be hurt on the other end.
In my family, there's no typical pattern of confronting these kinds of things, so I think I'll mostly have to forget about it and move on. Except that I don't really want to forget about it because it was said, and it hurts, and it shows the limitations of my own father. In two years' time, I won't remember this comment any more than I remember whatever they said when we first told them J was going to Chinese immersion in the first place.
Whatever the case, though, I hope that J will be someone who thinks before speaking, who considers the feelings of others before letting the words go. Somehow, I suspect that in those terms, J really does have a chance of being a real (caring) person, more so than my dad can ever dream of.
Posted by chri1010 at March 22, 2010 2:30 PM | Family Matters
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