The Case of the Bad Traffic Day
Mayorman and his assistant, The Assistant, made their way down to the 6 by 6 foot bomb depot number 3. Mayorman paced back and forth while The Assistant sat down at a table to look at the package. "We need to get this package across town. This looks like a job for..."
"Dirk Justice!!!" exclaimed Dirk Justice as walked into Bomb Depot Number 3. "Can I be of any help here?"
"Just in time Dirk," Mayorman stated. "Traffic is backed up all over town. The whole city is at a stand still. Flannel Man is the only super hero that can put a stop to the Traffic Jammer's evil ways. However, Flannel Man won't leave his house without this package. We need it taken to Flannel Mansion immediately. Can you help us?"
"I wish I could," explained Dirk. "But the Cycle of Justice can't get through this traffic either."
"Drat!" shouted the mayor. "Well then, I guess this looks like a job for..."
"Teleportation Man!!!" exclaimed Teleportation Man as he walked into Bomb Depot Number 3.
"Just in time Teleportation Man," Mayorman stated. "Traffic is backed up all over town. The whole city is at a stand still."
"Flannel Man is the only superhero that can put a stop to the Traffic Jammer's evil ways," added Dirk Justice.
"However, Flannel Man won't leave his house without this package," continued Mayorman while picking up the ordinary package. "We need it taken to Flannel Mansion immediately."
"Can you help us?" they all asked together.
"I will see what I can do," Teleportation Man boldly stated.
Teleportation man placed his hands to his head and closed his eyes. He attempted to mentally transport the package to the Flannel Mansion. "Hold on a second!" exclaimed Teleportation Man coming out of his trance. "It's wrapped in brown paper. That is my only weakness. I cannot teleport anything in brown paper."
"Foiled again!" Mayorman yelled. "These evil ninja cyborgs don't miss a trick! I guess it looks like a job for..."
"The Rubber Band!!!" exclaimed Mr. and Mrs. Rubber and their two kids Renee and Randy as they walked into Bomb Depot Number 3 to join Teleportation Man, Mayorman, Dirk Justice and The Assistant.
"Just in time Rubber Band," Mayorman stated. "Traffic is backed up all over town."
"The whole city is at a stand still," Teleportation Man continued.
"Flannel Man is the only superhero that can put a stop to the Traffic Jammer's evil ways," Dirk justice added.
"However, Flannel Man won't leave his house without this package," Mayorman injected while lifting up the ordinary package wrapped in brown paper.
"We need it taken to Flannel Mansion immediately!" Teleportation Man exclaimed.
"Can you help us?" they all asked.
"Rubber band, to action!!!" the Rubber Family yelled in unison.
As if they had done it repeatedly, Mr. and Mrs. Rubber hug. At the same time, the brother and sister, Randy and Renee, hug. In each embrace, the pair twisted and joined together. As if on cue, the two twisted Rubber family units joined together. Once the family had all joined together, they began to stretch into a very long Rubber family unit. In this configuration, Mr. Rubber picked up the package and carried it away. Much wriggling and stretching went on as they stretched and lengthened. Tighter and tighter their form became. Longer and longer their stretching went. When they were about a block from the Flannel Mansion, they stopped. They brought the package back, and untwisted. Looser and looser their form became. Shorter and shorter their stretching went. At one point, the one stretchy unit broke into two groups. Randy and Renee exited their embrace shortly before Mr. and Mrs. Rubber. As if nothing happened, they became the Rubber family again.
"Sorry Mr. Mayor," Mr. Rubber lamented. "It is just too far for us to reach."
"We did what we could," Mrs. Rubber added. "But it was just too much of a stretch for us."
"Curses foiled again!" shouted the Mayor. "I wonder if anyone here in Bomb Depot Number 3 could put a stop to the Traffic Jammers villainy. We need to find out how Flannel Man did it, and this looks like a job for..."
"The Dugman and his faithful compatriot Hyper Hank!" exclaimed Dugman as he and his trusty sidekick Hyper Hank walked into the Bomb Depot Number 3 joining Teleportation Man, Mayorman, Dirk Justice, the Rubber Band, and The Assistant.
"Dugman, you have knowledge of all things that have happened," started the mayor. "How did Flannel Man capture the Traffic Jammer?"
With his faithful compatriot on his shoulder acting as lookout, Dugman goes into a deep trance. "Flash!" Dugman suddenly exclaimed. "An unidentified evil ninja cyborg has just come into town. With his mystical evil ninja cyborg abilities and an invisible light ray, he stops traffic in all directions. Even low flying superheroes are caught in the worst traffic jam in Supervania since the explosion at the rubber ball factory. Authorities have made a call to all superheroes to stop this fiend. All efforts have been thwarted by the Traffic Jammer's anti-superhero technology.
"Later that day, Flannel Man comes onto the scene. This formerly immovable object now known to authorities as the 'Traffic Jammer' has met with an irresistible force. He feels compelled to give Flannel Man a hug. With the Flannel Man 'Hug of Justice©' fully applied, the Traffic Jammer is captured."
All of the occupants of Bomb Depot Number 3 nod in recognition of the story as Dugman came out of his trance. "Oh yeah," stated Mayorman. "We could never do that. This package must be taken to Flannel Mansion."
While no one was looking, Dirk Justice snuck out of the room between Renee and Randy Rubber. Suddenly, Teleportation Man has an idea. "Maybe the weather will get bad, and the Traffic Jammer will just go home," he said.
"You could be onto something there," exclaimed the mayor. "What is the weather going to be like? Does anybody know?"
"Sorry chief," answered Teleportation man
"No help here," added Dugman as Hyper Hank shook his head no.
"I haven't listened to the radio today," Renee Rubber injected.
"I haven't seen a paper," Randy Rubber stated.
"Uh, I have been so busy," Mr. Rubber started.
"With the traffic and all," Mrs. Rubber finished.
"No sir," added The Assistant not to be left out.
"Well then, it looks like a job for..." declared Mayorman.
"Weatherman?" asked Randy Rubber.
"No! The Environ-Mentalist!" the Environ-Mentalist exclaimed as he entered Bomb Depot Number 3 joining Teleportation Man, Mayorman, the Rubber Band, Dugman, Hyper Hank, and The Assistant.
"Environ-Mentalist, what does the weather look like for the rest of the day?" asked the Mayor.
"Sunny and nice," replied the Environ-Mentalist. "A high in the mid- to upper-seventies. Winds out of the southwest at 5 miles per hour. Tonight turning breezy. Winds picking up to 15 miles per hour, but will remain southwesterly. Tomorrow it will be partly cloudy. A high in the low eighties...
"Thanks Environ-Mantalist," Mayorman interrupts. "That is what we wanted to know.
"What rotten luck to have such beautiful weather," stated The Assistant.
"It sounds like a nice day," started Mr. Rubber.
"To go for a drive," finished Mrs. Rubber.
"Rats!" exclaimed the Rubber children.
"Well, it doesn't look like we can count on bad weather to help us," stated Mayorman. "Anybody have any other ideas?"
"Sorry chief," answers Teleportation man
"No help here," adds Dugman as Hyper Hank shakes his head no.
"I am fresh out of ideas," Renee Rubber injects.
"I've got nothing," Randy Rubber states.
"Uh, if we had more time," Mr. Rubber starts.
"We could probably come up with something," Mrs. Rubber finishes.
"It really isn't my bag," added the Environ-Mentalist.
"No sir," adds The Assistant not to be left out.
As all of the superheroes in Bomb Depot Number 3 tried to come up with something to thwart the evil Traffic Jammers ways, in walked a small unmasked person.
"Can I help?" he asked.
"Just in time Errand boy!" exclaimed the mayor.
"Traffic is backed up all over town," started Dugman.
"The whole city is at a stand still," added Teleportation Man.
"Flannel Man is the only superhero..." began Mr. Rubber.
"That can put a stop to the Traffic Jammer's evil ways," finished Mrs. Rubber.
"However," Randy Rubber interjected.
"Flannel Man won't leave his house," insisted Renee Rubber.
"Without this package," the Environ-Mentalist added while picking up the ordinary looking package wrapped in brown paper.
"We need it taken to Flannel Mansion immediately," said the mayor urgently.
"Can you help us?" they all asked.
"Gladly," Errand boy answered quietly.
Errand boy grabbed the package addressed to Flannel Man and put it in his backpack. With a little wave, he departed Bomb Depot Number 3 leaving all of the superheroes in the small room. Mayorman spoke, "Godspeed Errand boy. Hey, where did Dirk Justice go anyway?"
"He was just here a second ago," answered Teleportation man
"No help here," added Dugman as Hyper Hank shakes his head no.
"Maybe he had an appointment," Renee Rubber injected.
"I haven't seen him," Randy Rubber stated.
"Uh, I have been so busy," Mr. Rubber started.
"With the traffic and all," Mrs. Rubber finished.
"It didn't think it was my turn to watch him," added the Environ-Mentalist.
"I don't know sir," added The Assistant not to be left out.
Errand boy headed out of the Auditorium of Equitableness and located his bike locked up in the bike rack. He dutifully unlocked his bike, and hopped on for his bike ride across town. Errand boy nimbly dodged the traffic that was backed up because of the Traffic Jammer's invisible light ray. He wove in and out and dodged the various superheroes and their vehicles. Finally, he reached Flannel Mansion. He got off his bike, and locked it to a nearby bicycle rack. He ran to Flannel Man's door and knocked. Flannel Man opened the door. "Errand boy! Do you have my package?" he asked.
"Indeed I do," replied the somewhat out of breath Errand boy as he opened his pack and handed Flannel Man his much awaited package.
"At long last," sighed the anxious superhero. "How can I thank you Errand boy?"
Errand boy shrugged and just stood there. Flannel Man thought for a moment, and in a flash, inspiration struck. Flannel Man took out his wallet and gave Errand boy a dollar. Errand boy took the money and put it in his pocket. With a little wave, Errand boy ran to his bike, unlocked it, and rode off.
Flannel Man took his package inside his Flannel Mansion and closed the door behind him. Flannel Man quickly tore off the brown paper packaging. He opened the resulting box to reveal a small flannel suit. Flannel Man jumped behind his antique dressing screen. Soon a tattered and torn flannel suit was flung over the screen. The small flannel suit was different than the one Flannel Man was wearing, but it had obviously been worn on many adventures. Without much fanfare, Flannel Man emerged with Theodore his newly flanneled side kick. Theodore, a flannel clad stuffed bear, was clad in a new flannel suit. The duo were now ready for action.
"To the streets!" Flannel Man exclaimed.
Flannel Man, with Theodore clutched in his hand, raced towards the center of the traffic jam. Various superheroes spotted him and began to cheer him on.
"Go get him Flannel Man!" Anonymous Man shouted.
"Dude! Like end his gnarly bogatosity man!" exclaimed Slangman.
"Great googily moogily" added Idiom Boy.
Flannel Man and Theodore, after much difficulty, reached the center of the traffic jam. The Traffic Jammer felt an unmistakable urge. He felt Flannel Man's presence. He could not resist. He had to give Flannel Man a big hug. In the embrace, traffic was freed. With Flannel Man's 'Hug of Justice©' fully applied, the trio jumped into a waiting police van. The Traffic Jammer was once again brought to justice.
Once the crisis was over and the traffic was once flowing there was relief back at the Auditorium of Equitableness. Mayorman found the opportunity to recline back at his desk. This is how Flannel Man found him after they locked the Traffic Jammer up.
"Thank our lucky stars that is over," declared the mayor.
"Indeed," agreed Flannel Man.
"Once again evil has been put into the unmerciful 'Hug of Justice©'," started Mayorman. "The streets again flow freely with good townsfolk. Once again they have been freed from the unyeilding grip of an evil ninja cyborg. What adventures lie ahead for the good people of...
Where ankles rarely suffer from a sprain-ia
Where there's no shortage of wolfsbane-ia
It's Super Supervania.
"Gnarly dude!" added Slangman.
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