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December 1, 2006

Kim's University of divine struggle for crapulence

Kim is a truely remarkable leader. Embracing the concept of "distance learning," has established the Kim Il Sung Open University Web site, www.ournation-school.com, aimed at educating the world on North Korea's philosophy of "juche" or self-reliance. He has set up a system that allows only students and researchers at universities along with a selct few to have access to computers. This is made odd due to constant intranet surveilence on a nationwide scale. A handful of the elite have access to the wider Web, via a pipeline through China, but this is almost certainly filtered, monitored and logged. No one knows what is going on besides the high ranking officials, so it is quite difficult to grasp what information is being collected and distributed in that isolated region of the world we call North Korea. Is this how Kim is going to develop his weapons even further, or train his army a poutier and stylistic goosewalk? Perhaps they are coming up with new ideas to broadcast on Kim's show or invent a hairstyle that doesn't resemble cotton candy.

semi-sincerely,
Adouches Claptrap

Complications Upon Complications

Japan's new Prime Minister Shinzo Abe, on a visit to Seoul, South Korea, said "the development and possession of nuclear weapons by North Korea will in a major way transform the security environment in North Asia and we will be entering a new, dangerous nuclear age," Even with South Korea on our side, the situation may be out of control. While South Korea is building a military arsenal to form a resistance to Kim's plan, many think they are conspiring with the United States, as North Korea claims. It is becoming increasingly difficult to get accurate information from news coverage in North Korea, as the government is extremely restrictive in what is released to the press and shown to the populace. Even with foreign journalists about in the country, many have been sent to concentration camps for leaking information to the public and foreign associates. We can't even get a cellphone signal because they were banned in 2004. This has left us with very little knowledge about what Kim is really planning and how this will affect not only the Korean, but the Asian nations surrounding NK as well.

Sincerely Japanese Man Hanzo