Disappear
roll over just
getting past the thought
of holding your hand
falling asleep
you stroke my soul
through flesh
for a few hours
only to wake up and
discover i'm stuck again
used by you
to try and recover
your heart from a boy
i've never met
you had pulled away
from my words
while i clung to your
kisses
the most amazing
kisses i've ever felt
the contradictions of
your words and movements
i can't believe i'm
here again
is it me
or is it you
or is it them
perhaps a change of mind
is necessary
try harder to hide
every feeling
every thought
choose more wisely
or perhaps avoid
being chosen
that saucy substance
that hinders
my judgement
but frees
my emotions
i thought once
if only i could feel
once again
yet here i lie
hurting from another
betrayal of trust
of friendship
my body slowly
succumbing to the numbness
that surrounds my heart
if i don't feel at all
i can be a rock
but i already am
i sat before you
stunned at your words
at your actions
reacting only with cool
carelessness
but i do care
i still feel
but i do not tell you this
instead i choose to
disappear