Proximity is said to be one of the three major principles that guides attraction and relationships. There's no denying that proximity, or physical nearness, creates opportunities for relationships. According to the Lillenfield text, we are most likely to be attracted to and befriend people who are near to us, and see on a regular basis. The effects of exposure could explain this. If we see someone on a frequent basis, our attraction to him or her is heightened. This aspect is important because it is unique, and there are so many couples that can make it work without seeing each other frequently. So, How do people who have to be away from each other stay attracted to each other?
I have a few ideas. The first one is that the two people in the relationship, force the attraction to stay (sometimes successfully, sometimes unsuccessfully). I feel like these people tend to talk about their boyfriends or girlfriends frequently, and talk to them frequently. They try to distract themselves from other people and other things with their significant other. Sometimes I feel myself doing this, and I don't mean for this to sound like a destructive thing to do, because all it does is alleviate some of the sadness of having to be away from my boyfriend so much. Another idea I have is that some rare couples really are just genuinely comfortable with each other, so comfortable that being far away isn't a burden most of the time. I feel that I know a couple like this, they have been engaged practically since they got out of high school. I know that the two of them miss each other, but from what I've seen, these two are very supportive of each other. I know they don't even get to talk to each other everyday. These two also probably do not dwell on the fact that they have to be away from each other, neither do my boyfriend and I. I can honestly say it really helps. I still wonder how if proximity heightens attraction, why attraction wouldn't diminish with being away from each other?
I can honestly say in the three months I have been away from my boyfriend my attraction for him has not diminished at all. Am I just lucky? Is there some scientific reason for us still being together? Or are we just doing everything that long distance couples are supposed to be doing? This article, http://health.howstuffworks.com/relationships/advice/is-your-long-distance-romance-in-trouble.htm, talks about how you would know if your long distance relationship is in trouble. None of this is anything like the way my relationship is... but perhaps that is the remaining infatuation that comes from a new relationship?
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