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March 3, 2007

Sexual Politics-A nonreactive approach?

How would you confront or approach a power imbalance in a relationship or friendship without either of these two reactive extremes (1) allowing yourself to continue to be easily influenced or (2) attempting to seize or squash power or influence in your partner? This question can be approached by those who perceive that they have more influence in a relationship or those who do not. Interestingly enough, the partner who cares less often seems to carry more power, although it's hard for them to see that.

The Dating Game

What would you say to someone who argues that the 'dating game' doesn't exist and that people always have plenty of choices in relationships? Can you frame your response to them in the form of a question, preferably a curious question which is one way of not judging another person's perspective, but still encourages them to begin processing their own viewpoint.

Gender or Social Norm Challenge

What would it take for you to be convinced that you act in some ways that are inconsistent with who you think that you are versus who you present to others? This is for everyone who claims that see no disparities between who they present as in various roles / situations compared to who they are outside those roles/ situations. What would this kind of self-discovery look like for you?

Gender Norms: What purpose do they serve?

Many of us claim that we are our own person and some of us concede that, yeah, sometimes we find ourselves influenced by gender norms about how to act or how to think. So, let's think of this without judging these norms as good or bad. Instead, develop an argument that finds at least one positive or functional purpose behind following a gender norm and find at least one positive / functional purpose behind identifying and changing a behavior of yours based on a gender norm.

You might think of other gender norms, but here are some discussed in class.
Think of the Rachel (from Friends) and Alphonso (the Man-Child from Brawny Academy) as representatives of two type of gender norms. Rachel represents the female norm that encourages a preoccupation with figuring out what works/ doesn't work in relationships and then entering relationships with a partner who is less interested in commitment which creates crisis and eventually a concession that maybe the next relationship will work out. Alphonso repesents the male norm in which the world revolves around you, your interests, your ideas, your part of the conversation (i.e. your amount of influence) and is marked by reluctance to take responsibility of how a relationship works. In sum, a male self-centered norm and a female others-centered norm.