faux pas (f päz) n. pl.
A social blunder.
A socially awkward or tactless act.
What is loud as all hell, plays terrible music, has entirely too much bass, and is full of a bunch of little preps?
Thats right, a "party" in Calvin's room. It was last night (Saturday) and we were all in my room watching a movie, and Calvin and his little people were in his room next door, playing the music at a ridiculously loud volume. So eventually we got tired of it and Hersey goes next door and starts yellin at Calvin. I can't remeber exactly what went on, but in the end everyone over here ended up thinkin Calvin is a little bitch. I'm sick of writing though, so maybe I'll edit later, or even better, maybe someone will comment...Watson.
WARNING! THIS IS NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART!
Alright, I can't actually go into detail about this, because its really fucking wierd. But it started off innocently enough, but went so horribly wrong. It ended up involving 16 guys and a monkey, but not just any monkey. It was a dead, blind, earless monkey. We just TALKED about this, and didnt actually do anything dirty, but the discussion was wierd as hell. Don't deny youve never had a fucked up conversation with your buddies. You fill in the blanks.
Holy shit. Most interesting first date I've even been on.
It was last night (Friday). I'm not gonna go into much detail, if ya really want to know, just ask me. I'll give you a few highlights to grab your attention. Drunken roomates, snot from a crying girl's nose being blown onto my shirt, my neck being bitten. It was a crazy night.
So here's how the story goes, I'll probably forget some shit the first time, but oh well, what are ya gonna do? Anyways, the whole thing starts out like this, Garrett sends a message through the facebook to Dani, sayin how much I like her and want to ask her out so badly but am too scarred, or some shit like that, I'll try to get the exact message up later. Anyways, she messages back to him, sayin how she knows, and something to the effect of how she was sure I would ask her out. So what's a guy to do? I asked her out of course, why the hell not? She seemed like a cool girl, so why not. So I call her up, she didn't answer. About 30 minutes later, she calls back, but I was in my chemistry lecture, so i couldnt answer, but she left a message. I debated on whether or not i should leave lecture early and call her back, but i decided to wait, time was not of the essense. After lecture, I listened to the message, and gave her a call back. She didnt answer. I left her a message asking if she wanted to get somethin to eat after she got off work (she was at work, she told me in the message). So she calls me back after she gets off work, and we decide on a time to go eat. I dont have a vehicle, and she does, so she came over to T-hall and picked me up, and we started driving, without actually picking a place to eat. After driving around for a while, we picked buffalo wild wings in blaine. But as we were driving there, she remembered it was friday and she cant eat meat. so we go to TGIFridays instead. We get seated and look through the menus and whatnot. She orders a shrimp salad, I ordered a three course meal thing, first course was chicken quesadillas, which she ate some of (along with the meat). Then came the entrees. I had gotten the sizzling shrimp. It actually sizzled when it was brought out, it was nuts. We started eating and after a while my shrimp stopped sizzling, and I said (this is for your Watson) "My shrimp is broken." So we finished up eating and then came desert, some cheesecake, which was excellent. Throughout the dinner I also had about 4 vanilla cokes... which was a bad idea. After dinner we go back to her house and I get the grand tour. Her room was an insanely huge mess, it was great, you literally couldn't see the floor, it was completely covered in clothers. Reminded me of my dorm. And I almost forgot of the pictures which she showed me of her and Aurora kissing, not making out, just kissing. So we then sit down on the couch and watch the movie Cellular. There was no pressure at all, and so I immediately put my arm around her, and she approved. We watched the movie, and then after the movie was when I moved in and we made out for 30 seconds, tops. After that we moved into her friend's(Aurora) room because we had to watch The Royal Tennabams, and the only place it could be watched was in Aurora's room. So we lay down in bed, and I got my arm around her, and then Aurora comes home and walks in to the room. Dani and I aren't doing anything, but Aurora is drunk as all hell, and crawls onto bed and is stradling Dani, and whispering things to her. Keep in mind that these are "drunken whispers", so I could easily hear everything. It wasn't anything big, just how much Aurora likes Dani. The wierd thing was how every once in a while Aurora would look over at me and hit me. She justified the hittings by saying "oh we went to high school together". Which we did, but I really didnt know her that well. Anyways, she leans down to give Dani a hug, and when she comes up, her boob is hanging out of her little tank top, which Dani promptly put away for her. Aurora left after a while, and then came back, and crawled back on the bed, this time laying across us with her face in my stomach, and she's crying of course, and so she starts to blow her nose in my shirt. Then she moves her head, and does it again. She lifts up her head after that, and then lets it fall back down, right into her own snot. At some other point thoughout the night, she was stradling me, and she asks me If I had the hots for Elise Doll (a girl who went to my high school) and I say no, and then she leans down to my ear and whispers to me, "who do you have the hots for now?" And I dont say anything, and she says to me "if you dont tell me I'll bite you". I still dont say anything, and then she actually starts to bite my neck! I couldn't believe it, she just clamped down and kept biting, hard. She eventually let go, and she didnt break skin, but I had a huge mark on my neck for the next day or so. At some other point throughout the night(i cant remember everything exactly) Aurora had gone from saying, "no spermies" to "if youre gonna do anything, wear protection, because i dont want you dirting Dani up" This was after she had whispered in my ear "i'll assume you're a virgin." Yeah, makes perfect sense to me too. Anyways, she finally left but by that time the movie was over, so we put in another one, Requim for a Dream. We start watching that, and Dani falls asleep almost immediatly, but i wanted to see the movie, so I stayed up. After the movie, she was still asleep, so I just went to sleep too.
So a date, which I had originally planned on being only lunch, turned out to be dinner, 3 movies and a sleep over. Fucking nuts.
WHAT THE FUCK?!?! Why the hell is that fucking 'R' in there? There is no need for it. I for one will be boycotting the use of that letter and will from this day forward spell February the was it should be spelt: F-E-B-U-A-R-Y
WHO'S WITH ME?!
Jordan, Amanda, and I all jumped into Lake Superior...
It was a cold February's day, February fifth to be exact. The trek up to Superior was a long and perilous journey, in the old van, with the rear tire that leaked air, and the screwed up front end that shook like a little bitch constantly whenever the van was moving. But we braved the elements none the less. As we neared Superior, we entered a heavy fog, but our nerves were not shaken, we would not be stopped. We finally arrived, got ourselves checked in, and then a short time later, we were on our way to brave the trecherous waters of Lake Superior. We arrived at the site of the jump. Jordan and I were both eager to jump into the frigid waters, Amanda was not so zealous. We all jumped, into the waters, Amanda would never return back to the waters after she left them. But as for Jordan and myself, we returned to the waters not once more, not twice more, but three more times, vowing to return next year and enter the waters once more.
Here's a few pictures of what it looked like:
Amanda in the water
All of us after our first jumps
Just a side note, we didn't just do this for the hell of it (well, we kinda did) it was for the Minnesota special olympics. We had to raise $75 each, which was a hell of a lot harder to do than we thought. Next year, we'll do a little better.
"We are what we pretend to be."
-Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.-
Someone I know, let's call him Dave, (to keep his annomininity) (i spell real good) actually saw time...
I'm hoping that "Dave" will comment on his experience. It was a long time ago, at least a couple of months, but I think he should still remember how it went.
I'm baaaacccckkk! For at least one entry. It's been a while.
Now this is just a little thing, that I would have forgotten about completly within a few days, but I'm writing it down instead, so i can remember it forever...or at least untill the server crashes or something, i dunno. Anyways though, the thing that I had to write down was this: Last night, after I had just finished my shower and was drying off, I had a crazy phantom smell type of thing happen. I swore that something smelt like Cocoa Puffs cereal, but there was around that would have smelt like that. Its crazy shit. Big build-up, shitty ending, I know, shut the hell up.