Barrett Srstka and Tim Zhu - The Straight Shooters, a most Unholy Union

Dakota Slim and Mordok the Lesser met one snowy evening at the Goblin's Head.  Over pints of Goblin's Mead, their stories unfurled.  Dakota Slim was a hard luck country musician, talented and cursed.  He was in a rage that night, for his producer had refused to record a drinking album for Slim, for whom drinking was a lifelong passion.  Mordok the Lesser was a fugitive from the caves of Goblin Town, well versed in black magic and war, and was willing to kill for very reasonable prices.  A diabolical plan was hatched - Mordok would go, that very night, to the home of Slim's producer, and with his accomplice Gorg the Idiot, would murder the man in cold blood.  And so it was - the producer, who was known for recording the smash hit, "The Monster Mash" - would know the face of the two goblins' war clubs very well that night.  He did not die, however, but would be in a coma for the next six years.  Being a Christian man, upon recovery he would visit Slim, Mordok, and Gorg at the Hennepin County Penitentiary and forgive them.  When the three were released from jail, they would record two songs together, which remains to this day the only record we have of their creative output, for after these songs they would embark on a wild church burning spree, and are on the lam to this day.

Analysis of the two songs handed down to us by ethnomusicologists reveal the marriage of human folk and goblin folk traditions, fused together by a shared love of drink and the darker things in life.  Some scholars have posed the question, "why Minneapolis?"  Their ensuing research comes to the conclusion that perhaps there exists two Minneapolis(s), coexisting like a palimpsest.  One is what we perceive as the normal, modern world, while the other is a more timeless, ancient dimension, where monsters and demons are kings and the power of magic is feared.  In this realm, goblins laugh at the curse of life and death.

An anonymous fan has created a myspace page for the group, now known as the Straight Shooters for their no bullshit style: www.myspace.com/mnstraightshooters

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This page contains a single entry by srstk001 published on December 8, 2009 7:09 PM.

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