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August 20, 2001
and someday i'm gonna stay. but not today.
08.20.01--and someday i'm gonna stay. but not today.
"needles that make my arm feel as if it weighs one hundred pounds. friends that are distant and unclear. love that isn't love yet but some perverted form of adoration and obsession. this is my life." --courtneysorry. i just quoted an entire diary entry.
but damn. it's my life too. fully completely.
i have such ickiness brewing in the pit of my stomach that it makes me wish i could force myself to vomit. [i can't. try as i might, i have little to no gag reflex. (note: i don't try often.)]
to match the ickiness in my stomach is a burning sensation on the underside of my left breast. i can't concentrate for fear of what might be growing inside of me.
[i once read that a fairly high percentage (the exact number escapes me at the present) of breast tumors are detected by lovers. great. yet another reason i shall feel shitty about being single.]
france. talking with my mother last week about how i am going to go about quitting my current jobs and she says, "gee. i sure hope you aren't making a gigantic mistake."
WHAT?!?! what do you mean? i go around looking for mistakes! thank you for waiting until now to voice your concern.
the people sitting next to me in the computer lab should stop taking about taking the GRE before i have a full-on panic attack.
sometimes i feel like all i ever do is run away.
i sense some sort of pathetic counting crows marathon tonight. it's been so long. help.
someone should come over to my place. we'll have a john cusack movie marathon. i'll make spaghetti if you rub my head. and everything will be okay.
Posted by john2921 at August 20, 2001 04:59 PM | TrackBack popup
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