forcing my views upon you™

Endblog: The Honors Presentations or: The culmination of all things sucky.

Mon, 05 May 2008 16:47:37 -0600

The original blog prompt was something along the lines of "talk about two presentations you liked."

I'm going to take the prompt and twist it and shape it in my heartless, callous bastard way of shaping things.

To be honest, I'm not a pessimist.
I just take issue with a lot of things.
I have high hopes for humanity.

As stated in the title, the Thursday presentations were the culmination of all things sucky (for lack of a better word).

Broc and Kelly- your presentation was fine. You were able to get an example of the OLPC- this is good, but is ultimately a spiced up version of show and tell. After parsing through a few student blogs, it seems the mere presence of the OLPC made the kelly/broc presentation enjoyable/memorable, when in reality, they said the word "technology" so many times I almost hurled my half-digested yogurt parfait on the freshman seated beside me.

ZOMG!! A LAPTOP! WHAT A BRILLIANT PRESENTATION!!!111!!1

If interspersed with EVERYONE else's presentations would I have been able to identify it as an honors presentation? Maybe, but I really don't think so.

Hon·or: an advanced course of study for superior students.

On Thursday, the 1701 class in its entirety witnessed a present-day problem with the education system; students who can take advantage of the system- the ones who take multiple-choice tests and run with them- are given the honors student garb. They are the elite multiple choice test takers. Their freshman writing papers were stellar (though boring as turd-sandwiches), and their blood and sweat can be found all over the U's libraries. As a reward for their heartlessness, their social reclusiveness, and their dog-like obedience to academic guidelines and/or worldly principles, these students are classified as the elite- the "honors" students***.

The Thursday presentations were boring, non-passionate, and altogether average, however, I did somewhat enjoy the presentation on low-income housing in Minneapolis. What SHOULD have went down on Thursday is this: the TAs should have each chosen one (1) presentation from their multiple recitation sessions. The day of "honors" presentations should have been nixed from the syllabus and replaced with "THE DAY OF THE BEST PRESENTATIONS FROM THE CLASS."

My group's presentation was okay.

There were better presentations in the class than were shown on Thursday. Fact. There were MANY better presentations in the class than were shown on Thursday. Fact.

The automatic showing of honors presentations and the tossing aside of the rest of the class is a terrible muzzling of creativity.

If the honors presentations were so fabulous, they would have naturally been chosen if grouped with the rest of the class.

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I have nothing against honors students (for the most part). My grossly sweeping generalizations of the average honors student are grossly sweeping generalizations. I do have a problem with the definition of honors student. Unfortunately, we Do live in a world where intelligence and creativity are relatively undefinable, thus we have tests, etc... but to make the test, this... this vessel for the regurgitation of "facts and figures", the be all end all for determining the cream of the crop is ludicrous- especially in a field that rewards out-of-the-box thinking and creative solutions to a growing number of problems in the world.

Let's leave multiple choice tests, late-night cramming, heartlessness, dropping hobbies, haggling for better marks, online-classes, class dropping, adderall, single-minded thinking, and honors (under their current definition) to the pre-med majors.

Architecture is not about becoming the next Frank Lloyd Wright (I'm so disgusted every time I read that one).

Architecture, and academia as a whole should be motivation fueled by curiosity. That is all.

/idealism

Blog Prompt 6: Finding millennium project inspiration, but first- let's eliminate "random" from our vocabulary.

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 19:59:58 -0600

Before I begin my introduction, here's something funny I found pertaining to the Large Hadron Collider... If you don't know a lot about it, look it up, it's a real swell experiment.

OKAY JEEZ IT'S THE WORLD'S LARGEST PARTICLE ACCELERATOR AND IT'S HOPEFULLY GOING TO SHOW US WHY THE FORCE OF GRAVITY IS SO WEAK, I MEAN- LOOK AT HOW POWERFUL A SMALL MAGNET IS (magnetic force) STICK IT ON YOUR BROTHERS BRACES SO HE CAN'T PULL IT OFF, AND THEN COMPARE IT TO HOW POWERFUL THE GRAVITY OF THE ENTIRE EARTH IS (drop a pencil on the ground).

The Large Hadron Collider

A little more background- There are some weeners in the world that think the collider is going to start some sort of miniature black hole or some sort of cataclysmic earth-destroying explosion after it gets turned on and they've filed a law suit against the people in charge.

What's remarkable about this lawsuit is that it's suing for the POSSIBLE FUTURE damages that could occur. It's ridiculous, and with that-

Large Hadron Collider Doomsday What-ifs-

"Q: What happens if an escaping convict accidentally wanders into the collider, gains super powers, and tries to take over the world?

A: Obviously one of the scientists will have wandered into the collider as well. Although his or her superpowers will not be as powerful/deadly/cool as the convict's, their determination, faith in humankind, and good heart will allow them to narrowly win in the end, no matter how badly the odds look to be stacked against them.

They will still have a hard time getting laid, though."

And now, I present to you, reader, my usual blog introduction-

Using the word "random" doesn't make you cool- instead, it groups you with that annoying barrel of people who actually say "LOL" in real life conversations. It wasn't cool two years ago and it isn't cool now. You're like an alien that came here and learned how to speak english with some sort of techno-rific language assimilator device... you might know all of the words, but your usage is pretty AWK. You sound like a fool and an alien. LOL was never cool outside of chatroom conversations where you could also find a/s/l and 15f- I'll stop there.

Random used to be a great adjective.

"What kind of music do you like?"

"Ah, my music interests are pretty random, you know- david bowie, radiohead, sonic youth, russian classical, and of course, any ambient bird noise."

This is random. This is what random was and should have been and should be, but isn't.

In a few clicks you can find the word random all over facebook- interested in: RANDOM play, interests "WELL, I HAVE A LOT OF RANDOM INTERESTS LOL", music- "ANYTHING PLAYED OVER AND OVER AGAIN ON MY FAVORIET TOP-40 CLEARCHANNEL STATION.... BASICALLY PRETTY RANDOM LOL"

...and my personal favorite- About me: I"M PRETTY RANDOM!

Maybe the sour taste random leaves in my mouth goes beyond my depiction. Perhaps "Random" has become the catch-all word for those times when you just don't know how to describe something, or when you're just too lazy or when you're just too inept to think of something interesting to write.

I'm officially boycotting random. It will no longer be a category in my blog. Forever.

And with that- (Drum roll)

Blog Prompt 6- Look for and document some examples of presentation/documentation styles that your term project may take as inspiration.

Group Awesome™ (unofficial name that only I know about), my group, is filming a documentary of documentaries. With the teaching/class style of ARCH 1701 in mind, our group realized that our project should go beyond those snoozerific powerpoint presentations, those elitist, egocentric, never unpretentious, indecipherable, inhuman billboards most commonly found lining the inner walls of Rapson... and research papers? Hell no.

There is a time and place for all forms of presentation, including powerpoints and billboards. Group Awesome™ feels that ARCH 1701 has a different set of demands.

The project should be-
Creative/different
ENJOYABLE TO MAKE/DO!
Informative
Comprehendible
BOTH ENJOYABLE AND INTERESTING TO THE AUDIENCE

~~We're going to do a video documentary.~~ Our group has started the video documentary. It's been a blast so far.

Here is where I personally want the documentary to go. (This is Not NSFW, it's not bad, really. click it (You know you want to).

I've was always fascinated by those "weekly reader" magazines when I was a young lad... On the back the magazine would have a few pictures of ~~random~~ very close up or very far away textures and you would try to identify what exactly it was you were looking at.

What is it?

The documentary should WOW the audience, it should be something unexpected, not Too avant-garde, and entertaining. The problem with most information we see on a day-to-day basis is how we retain it, or how we DON'T retain it. In 4 years if someone mentions the "Feed My Starving Children" organization to a viewer of my group's documentary, I want them to be able to remember at least a few things.

Let's be honest here- most information is boring; it's poorly designed. Entertainment doesn't have to be lacking in information.

A few ideas-

split screens, different things happening at once, a tour of the organization, an interview, our group eating the prepackaged meal from FMSC
seeing other people watching the documentary
blinking eyes
ambient chanting that has meaning later in the video
normal interviews,
hollywood film style- a person waking up from a night of partying and finding Nothing in the fridge

turns on the television

perspective switches to a newscast

We might not have a lot of video editing ability, but good design doesn't necessarily require fancy tools. Fancy tools just create a different kind of good design.

The above video was made by a Lawrence University student and it's being shown in the Walker museum here in Minneapolis. I like it. I haven't watched the whole video yet, but the first minute is great. The first 5 seconds are fantastic.

Onward and upward.

SPOILER ALERT (Pertaining to the What is it? picture)
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It's.....a.... a.... CHEESE SLICER!

Service Learning Day 3- I'm gonna give you some terrible thrills, like a:

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 19:28:35 -0600

I might keep the rocky horror soundtrack on auto-play for two weeks. Sorry [I just like it so much, and you should too!].

Once again, I helped some students with their math problems. I'm beginning to feel a yearning for more responsibility. I was hoping Augsburg would allow me to do more problem solving/be slightly little more hands on... ACTIVE; at the moment, I'm feeling like another body in the room- I feel as though I'm just a randomly picked college student that can answer a child's questions. My issue isn't so much with the job itself. I'm just feeling like I personally could be doing something that makes much more use of my abilities.

Solution?

Continuing at Augsburg, but currently seeking new/additional volunteer job.

Or I could just make a website and dedicate it to Susan Sarandon.

It's basically a toss-up.

Blog Prompt 5: How Country-Bumpkin-Land Made Me the Man I am Today

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 00:26:36 -0600

I'm fortunate- at least I think I am.

Immediately preceding my 4th grade education, my family moved to a place far, far from the evil clutches of the urban-dwelling majority, a place where there is True natural division between cities/suburbs; it's a place where (unfortunately.) 99% of the people are white and the tiny plastic kiddie pools often seen in their front yards directly correlate to the size of the area's gene ~~pool~~puddle. Traffic is non-existent. Traffic SIGNALS are non-existent. There aren't any factories or smokestacks or banana republics. We have farm smell- A LOT of farm smell. Cow shit actually begins to smell good after you’ve been around it for a few years. Honest.

Are there hemp flakes in this paradise? No. It's the land of ~~milk and honey~~ brats and beer and wonderbread.

It's northwest Wisconsin- the final frontier. (In some regards.)

Blog Prompt 5: Explore through image and text how the built environment affects (supports or detracts) who you are. Spec… No, sorry.
What follows is sure to please:
This isn’t some sort of pseudo pre-emptive self-defense bullshit; I promise, but it isn’t the novel it Could be.

****Disclaimer- I’m about to make some sweeping generalizations; they’re meant to be taken with ramen noodle amounts of salt.

The Bubble-

The village of 1000 people is a bubble; it’s bounded by miles and miles of woods and farmland. The nucleus of the bubble is my school. My life, for 9 years revolved around a graduating class of about 60 people.
The bubble is all encompassing; everything and everyone within the bubble is your family. You know everything about everyone. You know about how much the Simpleton family makes, that so-and-so’s parents like to have more than a few at the bar every Friday.

They know you put up some nearly-naked photographs of yourself on Facebook.

And?

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School=Conveyer belt?

Edit- I've spent way too much time on this blog entry. I'm about to embark on my third attempt to solve this riddle. People write multi-volume books on this sort of stuff. Attempt 1- I tried to show how the Colfax Bubble is different from the city. Attempt 2- I tried to compare the framework of Colfax High School to a conveyer belt in a factory. It's constantly producing education- cumulating in graduating seniors. The education produced is semi-homogenous, but there are errors and oddballs created (somehow) all the time, and the fact of the matter is....

Your SCHOOL, your TOWN and your external surroundings are not the sole dictators of You, but they sure contribute a lot. Personally, I think the external stimuli provide you with OPPORTUNITY to become a certain type of person, but who you finally become is a result of what you decide to do with the opportunities.

Barefoot running rocks my socks.

I say I'm fortunate because I think I did a decent job at taking advantage of the opportunities offered by rural upbringing.

I was average runner. I ran on the school's tiny division 3 cross country team and now I really enjoy being healthy, exercising, and being a member of the borderline clinically insane cross country runner culture.

I was an average actor. I was in lead roles in school plays and today I carry the spontaneousness and excitement of stage experience throughout my every day life.

I was in need of a job. I milked over 100 cows at a farm every week for 2 years. With this dirty and dangerous job experience, I think I could do just about anything... Except physics.

the list goes on.

Had I been raised in an urban environment, I highly doubt I would be in the same position I'm in today.

I sometimes watch this-

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 17:13:37 -0600

It's from the hit 2006 french movie, La Science des rêves, or The Science of Sleep. If you haven't seen it- do. It's a little quirky, don't say I didn't warn you.

Service Learning- Day 2- How I was kicked out of English class and forced to teach exponential functions.

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 16:56:12 -0600

G.W. is not a tutor at Augsburg

With english workbook packet in hand, and rules for independent clauses fresh in my mind, I marched into ms. she-who-will-not-be-named-due-to-my-terrible-terrible-absentmindedness' English class. Was it my swagger, my puffed-out and prideful chest? Did my large, black, plastic-rimmed glasses somehow reveal my somewhat-extensive yet wholly repressed knowledge of multivariable calculus and differential equations?

Actually, Augsburg has an odd scheduling system. Students focus on two subjects for 2 or 3 weeks and then switch subjects for another 2 or 3 weeks. I wasn't being kicked out of English class; I was merely being transferred to the location of my ESL students- the math room.

I thought it went quite well. It wasn't exactly a math "class," but rather- a sort of hour-long study hall for people who wanted help with their math homework. I roamed the classroom like some sort of all-knowing being and I was actually useful for the students; ~~I truly hope I didn't add to their collective confusion.~~

Service Learning Project- Augsburg Academy (My first day)

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 16:26:30 -0600

730 Hennepin- It's so hot right now.

Day 1- I'm reaching far back into my memory. About 4 weeks ago I began my service learning project for 1701 at Augsburg Academy at 730 Hennepin. It's a charter school and I believe it specializes in putting students into health-related careers. Upon entering the building for the first time, I was greeted by a security guard who jotted down my name. I had a nice chat with the man, but as of last week, to the classmates and my dismay, talking to the front desk security guard is strictly prohibited.

My job at Augsburg is helping the teachers with the ESL students. On day one I was plunked in the English classroom.

Day 1 ranked fairly high on the awkward scale. I sat at the round table next to the students; they're high schoolers. It felt as though I was joining a long deep discussion halfway through, but not quite. Everyone knew what was going on but yours truly. At the table from left to right- Me, teacher, ESL student, ESL student, ESL student. Towards the end, I felt like I could probably take the reins, but I let the teacher, whose name escapes me, continue her art. At the end of the hour, which went by quite quickly, I snatched a copy of next week's assignment with hopes of usurping power at the round table.

Blog Prompt 4: A deer-in-headlights reaction.

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 23:12:01 -0600

First of all- I'm still tired. The Creative River is a mere trickle these days. I am the the end of the Colorado River of creative juices but with LIKE FIVE ADDITIONAL STATES USING IT'S WATER. I am a trickle. I am a trickle. I am the opposite of david bowie.

Would I agree that Hobbs' Leviathan agrees with my mental philosophy? No.

To begin my dilemma- here's a quote from one of my favorite movies, Adaptation. If you need further encouragement, the words came out of Nicholas Cage's mouth. ~~Also- the rest of this blog entry revolves around this quote. I'm not going to reference this quote in the rest of the blog entry, but trust me- it's damn important.~~

Don't be intimidated by the size (of this quote).

"Do I have an original thought in my head? My bald head. Maybe if I were happier, my hair wouldn't be falling out. Life is short. I need to make the most of it. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I'm a walking cliché. I really need to go to the doctor and have my leg checked. There's something wrong. A bump. The dentist called again. I'm way overdue. If I stop putting things off, I would be happier. All I do is sit on my fat ass. If my ass wasn't fat I would be happier. I wouldn't have to wear these shirts with the tails out all the time. Like that's fooling anyone. Fat ass. I should start jogging again. Five miles a day. Really do it this time. Maybe rock climbing. I need to turn my life around. What do I need to do? I need to fall in love. I need to have a girlfriend. I need to read more, improve myself. What if I learned Russian or something? Or took up an instrument? I could speak Chinese. I'd be the screenwriter who speaks Chinese and plays the oboe. That would be cool. I should get my hair cut short. Stop trying to fool myself and everyone else into thinking I have a full head of hair. How pathetic is that? Just be real. Confident. Isn't that what women are attracted to? Men don't have to be attractive. But that's not true. Especially these days. Almost as much pressure on men as there is on women these days. Why should I be made to feel I have to apologize for my existence? Maybe it's my brain chemistry. Maybe that's what's wrong with me. Bad chemistry. All my problems and anxiety can be reduced to a chemical imbalance or some kind of misfiring synapses. I need to get help for that. But I'll still be ugly though. Nothing's gonna change that."

If you read all of that, I'm content. If you didn't read all of that, I'm content.

My contentment is constant and commonly uncontested by curious (or non-curious) contrivances.

Last Thursday, more specifically- last Thursday's blog prompt penetrated my mental blockade. Please, don't pride yourself, it's not a fantastic achievment; the blog prompt has merely pushed me into deer-in-headlights mode.

In deer-in-headlights mode, you physically cannot complete an assignment. The Assignment.

In deer-in-headlights mode, you can function in all other aspects of life. You can do your landscape architecture project. You cannot do your blog prompt. You can choose to procrastinate your landscape architecture project. You cannot do your blog prompt. You can buy a Delorean. You cannot do your blog prompt.

Here is the prompt-

Blog Prompt 4: If you were completely released from the constraints of the 'architecture school' program, what would you do architecturally, artistically, bodily, lyrically, etc that would still have an impact on your environment. Describe a real or imagined place which might allow you to do this.

I'm doing my blog prompt.

It's something I see and feel and breathe every waking minute of my life manifested in blog prompt format.

I feel like a loser (the opposite of a winner, the opposite of hallelujah) because, honestly, I don't really know what I would do.

How do you achieve uniqueness, how do you do something special, how do you make a mark in a world where uniqueness is fashionable? ~~Everyone~~ Most people, at least the people in my circles, are fixing to become the next einstein, corbusier or simply the next banksy. It's a good thing. It's a good thing.

I've always thought that being one of those fancy people... is something that just happens. No one plots their future brilliance on a map. It just happens. I think. Usually. I mean. Maybe.

I often tell my friends that I was supposed to be some sort of warrior, maybe a longbowman, fighting for my country, perhaps for social change... Instead, I'm trying to figure out how to block spam from my inbox, ~~answering blog prompts~~ poking people on facebook, working up the confidence to ask babes on dates.

I want to be a revolutionary.
I want to circumnavigate the globe.
I want to fight for a cause.
I want to be the Tao.
I want to be the original thought.
I want to be absolute truth.
I want to be poor.
I want to be rich.
I want to lose myself, to drown out my thoughts, in passion for something. Anything.
I want to do something no one else has done without any calculating or plotting.

There is so, so, much pressure in today's world to make an impact on THE environment (in the natural sense), and/or your environment (your surroundings, the world), that you start to lose the ability to do, or maybe find, what you really, truly, honestly, unplottingly, uncalculatingly love. Your life becomes tangled up and forced down the river of Impact. People are so caught up in the idea that they must make the most out of this mysterious life.... being brilliant, traveling the world, reading everything, that they miss out on... a lot.

I want to experience the world in such a way that I don't know about or care about people making impact. I don't want to be pressured into making an impact. I want to experience the world. I want to pursue my desires with an untainted mind. At the end of the day, if I make an impact, then I make an impact.

Some people love gardening.
Some love physics.
Some love to travel.
Some people make impacts.
Some love gaining knowledge.
Some love to be ignorant.
Some people get so caught up in the need to make an impact that they don't see, or forget to discover the parts of life they really enjoy.

A silent snow-covered street.

I want the word "Zach" to paint a picture, a statement, to resonate, to be a colorful expression, to not be some quiet, empty hallway of opened doors or some dirty piece of notebook paper covered in question marks.

Procrastination, you are my abusive step-father.

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 00:10:21 -0600

It has been one hell of a Monday evening. Tuesday morning [read: 12:01 AM to 4 AM] isn't looking so good either.

But before I go back to work, I would like to dedicate this award to-

Frank (for assigning this project),

the case of Full Throttle in the fridge (for your 55 grams of sugar, for helping me maintain awareness in these these troubled, troubled times).

Bill Gates (for making the Microsoft Suite, most notably- Excel, such a pain in the ass to work with),

And lastly, myself (for honestly believing I wasn't procrastinating this project)

Some art- The nightly progression.

Sat, 23 Feb 2008 13:42:00 -0600

I was instructed to draw an object from a few different viewpoints.

Here are my first experiments with the charcoal medium-

Blog Prompt 3: It's Thursday afternoon and too late to blog about the millennium goals, but it's not too late to complain about them.

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 09:53:40 -0600

It's a joke.

My group is working on Millennium Goal No. 1- Eradicate extreme poverty and hunger.

The following picture represents my present knowledge about, my feelings toward, and my current ideas for eradicating extreme poverty and hunger around the world-

Some tunes mostly related to the issue-at-hand-

Here's my problem- if most of the world is at or below poverty level, then why is it such a secret? The United Nations has deemed poverty and hunger to be the number one problem that needs attacking. Why isn't this plastered everywhere? Why am I not being bombarded with videos of factories in poor countries where my shoes are made? Why don't I know what exactly a dollar a day of wages actually buys in these places? There is a terrifying absence of publicity on this important topic. To solve this problem, it first needs to be brought from the outer edge of mainstream media, out of the fog, and to the dinner table.

One of the first results for a youtube search "dollar a day." A fantastic video, but only 928 views?

Blog Prompt 2: To hell with the individual- let's re-shape society around something... different.

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 19:27:58 -0600

individualistic society

We live in a society of individuals. individual thought. individual movement. individual learning. and individual urination. let's break this mode of thought and rebuild it bigger, stronger, better, and altogether less... individualistic.

This week's blog prompt was something like: Find a social-design issue. Talk about it. Become an advocate for it.

While riding the bus one day, I realized that everyone was sitting alone. Nearly everyone in Minneapolis walks alone; everyone looks like they're on a mission. and they are.

From an early age, we've been led to believe that people are unpredictable; they're greedy, and they're dangerous. I think it's safe to say that it's been like this for thousands, if not millions of years, and for good reason. The society founded not-on-individualism was probably taken advantage of, pillaged and salted long, long ago.

what sort of transportation would the non-individualistic society sport?

I propose pushing people out of their individual comfort zones. Let's design an environment that makes it easy- really easy (almost to the point of forcing) for people to trust, care and interact with each other. While waiting for the bus on the west bank, I noticed that the people around me were standing in the most-curiously organized-but-not-near-each-other pattern.

the non-individualistic society has a lot to offer. including body heat.

Individual urinals. Individual sinks. If everyone in the men's bathroom has one (a penis), and [almost] everyone does it (washes their hands), why are there separated urinals and sinks? Perpetuation of the individual norm. Let's break down these barriers; put in a half-moon multi-person sink from our youth and one long barrel for pissing. Not only would these modifications cut down on building and repair cost (e.g. one pipe vs two), but they would bring people closer together both physically and mentally.

Building with the individual in mind perpetuates fear, tension and embarrassment. Let's break these barriers down and show the world that everyone's actually human.

Blog Prompt 2: Why it took so long-

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 19:11:17 -0600

Okay. I'm a little late on this prompt. I've been dreadfully sick; I'm quite sure the flu virus had its way with me while I waited for an hour outside during the black, icy heart of Minnesota winter to participate in the democratic process.

For my international readers- the democratic process in Minnesota is basically:

1. Freeze your ass off while waiting in line.
2. Scribble the name of the candidate of your choice on a scrap piece of notebook paper on a table next to a large group of people (make sure you move your eyes about 3 inches over to see who all of your friends are voting for)
3. Fold the scrap of notebook paper in half (this is very important.)
4. Place the scrap of notebook paper in the suspicious-looking recycled ice-cream bucket.
5. Walk home with a proud expression on your face.

some graffiti art. (a tribute to W-)

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 18:53:22 -0600

xoooox- a german (?) graffiti artist. one of my favorites.

more xoooox.

Check out the xoooox website. it's real swell. and thought-provoking.

not xoooox- just amazing.

Blog Prompt 1: The City is filled with energy and is quite capable of devouring the children, the elderly, and yourself.

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 00:01:06 -0600

Disclaimer- The title of this entry is not the name of the arctic monkeys' newest song.

Does anyone REALLY know if this button actually does anything? No.

Earlier this weekend, I set out to find energy in the city, but before I set out, I contemplated (in a prostrate position facing the east) where...

to find this energy. While discussing the topic with my most knowledgeable and cultured housemate, I immediately brought up what I've always for the last three weeks thought of as The Pastel Towers®. Upon fierce argument with said housemate and serious wikipedia consultation, it turns out that:

A. I'm a newb.
B. My charming Pastel Towers® really are referred to as the Crack Stacks® by true minneapolis residents, but in most publications, my precious towers are eloquently named Riverside Plaza.

~~The Pastel Towers~~ Riverside Plaza (in all its glory)

After some fine dining at the Hard Times Cafe and also after drawing a nude old man for three hours straight, I set out towards the plaza on my quest for the elusive city energy.

I decided that the best way to be inspired was to pretend my eyes judge objectively rather than subjectively; it's harder than it sounds. Okay, it's actually impossible, but I won't go into the details. As I reached the outer ring of the Riverside Plaza, the first thing (this is the truth) my objectively-judging eyes saw was a man relieving his body and soul on the corner of the nearest building.

About-face! I turned around and swore under my breath and with the perspiration dripping down my forehead like a feverish, sick child, I realized that I had just transferred to the U. I had just moved to minneapolis from a small wisconsin town not even three weeks before. My eyes? Truly objective. Here ends the sermon.

As a newcomer to Minneapolis, and a complete newcomer to urban environment, I was able to observe the city from a unique and fresh perspective. was comparable to a man from 1954 being transplanted to 2007, but not so much a baby fresh from the... it wasn't quite that fresh. I present to my thoughts to you, reader-

The city is mostly a twisted reflection of [insert name of piece of pristine wilderness/nature here]. Upon first glance, Minneapolis seems to be nature conquered by man; it's a trophy of science and progress. The food chains (not of the McDonald's variety), the forests, the earth, the swamps, the beasts, the creeks, darkness, confusion, and the mysterious have all been plowed down and buried beneath a heavy layer of concrete. They've been replaced by something both spectacular and terrifying; it's something one measly blog entry will only scratch at.

spectacular and terrifying.

The streets constantly crackle and cackle and bend and dip as if they're singing some sort of harmony with the ground they cover. Snow covers ice patches. Watch your step. I won't even begin to discuss the havoc of transportation, intersections, crazy drivers, insane bicyclists.

Smells of nature have been transformed. Scents of delicious food, human excrement, pollution, and marijuana fill the air, and for many of these smells, it's impossible to tell where they're coming from. Catching a whiff of urine in the air while walking through a busy washington avenue intersection is quite puzzling.

Are humans one species? I see people finding niches at all sorts of points in some sort of man-dominated, proverbial food-chain. In the city, the different flavors of humans have replaced nature's order. The lions are perhaps living in the top of the skyscrapers, and yet there are people down at the bottom feeding off of... something. A lot of people in between. Everyone is important, and yet- no one is important here. There are also dangerous people.

The city is not a playplace. Man has, in my eyes, failed to create the densely populated, nature-conquered utopia. The city holds some kind of power, some natural energy that goes far beyond man. This energy is reflected in the city's daunting- yet beautiful complexity, and most-importantly, its ability to destroy. Destruction... death, is only seconds away for any urban dwellers, and it doesn't take a nerdy pre-architecture pre-professional pre-major from nowhere, wisconsin to point out this little tidbit of information.