Coon Rapids abductor
Some of the unecessary one-liners made in the Pioneer Press article on the Coon Rapids abductor sounded cliche: "The stranger may have been no stranger at all", and editorialized: "Cops closed in fast."
I did find a way to attribute and describe charges, when reporting on crime cases. This reminds me of some of the labs we had to do and many of us didn't know how to attribute or report charges/arrests. This is how this story handled it:"He is being held in the Anoka County Jail pending a court hearing Monday or Tuesday to determine bail. He has not been charged, although charges could come as early as today from Anoka County prosecutors.
"We're very confident we have the correct guy, and we're confident the charges will hold," said Coon Rapids Police Sgt. Tom Hawley." The author also found and used tax records to show who lived in the house with the accused.
The Star Tribune's lead was much stronger and was attributed:"Once reports came in that a stranger had abducted and assaulted a 12-year-old girl Friday on her way to her school bus stop, just about every Coon Rapids police staffer, along with several Anoka County sheriff's officials and a State Patrol helicopter crew, began trying to track down the suspect, said Sgt. Tom Hawley." Throughout the story they also were more concise and got more to the point with the facts.