Semblance of a Whole

Literary Lightweight

Back in May, the New York Times published the results of a survey of prominent writers, critic, editors, etc., in which they were asked their opinion on the best work of American fiction of the past 25 years. The winner was Toni Morrison's Beloved. What was interesting to me, however, was the list of runners up and the twenty or so additional titles that were cited as having received multiple votes. They had one glaring thing in common: With the exception of the winner, Beloved, I haven't read a single one of them.

I've done a lot of reading in the past quarter of a century -- far above the average American, I'd suspect. I'm used to thinking of myself as fairly intellectual, but the truth is when it comes to reading, I rarely choose anything too demanding. I don't read a lot of trashy novels, but neither do I challenge myself with the highly literary titles, at least not when it is for my own leisure reading. The fact that I've read Beloved was the result of one of my occasional attempts to apply myself to something "more serious." I remember enjoying the book -- I certainly found the story moving and the writing beautiful, but I also remember feeling rather impatient with it as well. To be honest, I wasn't always sure I understood it.

When I am reading what I consider to be a really good book, I am not actually aware that I am reading. I no longer see the page in front of my eyes, nor am I conscious of the physical act of turning the pages. It's almost like watching a movie in my head. If the reading is too demanding, I can't achieve that alpha state-like experience, and I sometimes give up on it. So now you know the truth: despite my intellectual aspirations, I'm a lazy reader -- a literary lightweight.

At this point you might be wondering what books I would have put on that list. My next confession is that I don't remember most of the books I've read well enough to say. It's not that I don't remember anything I've read in the past 25 years, but the overall percentage is pretty small. I tend to devour books and quickly forget minor details like the title, the author, and the plot. It's embarrassing to admit that, but there is one benefit: When I have a hankering to read, I can almost always find something already on my bookshelf. It's almost like new!