hey ikea, do you want to hear a pirate joke?
this past weekend i was in denver to cheer on the twins. i rode the light rail in and out of downtown and made friends going both ways. the people i met on the way home were very entertaining.
let me introduce you to rich and his 28 year old daughter renee.
rich is a retired guy probably in his 60s, he did most of the talking, so this story is mostly about him. his daughter just sat next to him thoroughly embarassed the whole time.
he thought i was dressed funny. he said i looked like an ikea store. renee points out that he shouldn't talk because he's wearing a button up shirt with fish printed on it. "i like to fish," he says.
i tell them i'm from minnesota. so rich decides to become a tour guide, "that bar there is the first place in denver to get a liquor license."
"wow," i play along.
"they have a very exotic menu, like rocky mountain oysters. those are buffalo testicles." he laughs like a little school boy.
i cringe and say, "barf, that's disgusting."
"hey, do you want to hear a bar joke?"
i have come to realize that older people love to tell jokes. being one to enjoy a good joke i reply, "sure, why not?"
"k, so what's your name?"
"david."
"k, well david you'll be the bartender. my name's rich, i'll be the customer."
"aight."
"so rich walks into the bar and he's dressed like a pirate. arrrrrrr. he tells david that he's decided to become a pirate. arrrrrrrrr. david asks him how he got his peg leg, and rich tells him that he lost his leg in the warrrrrrrrr. then david asks him about his hook. rich says he accidently cut that off with a knife. arrrrrr. finally david asks rich about the eye patch. rich says a bird pooped in his eye. arrrrrr. now david's like, wait a minute, you can't lose an eye from bird poop. rich says, i know, but i only had my hook for one week. har har harrrrrrrrrrrr."
"ha, that's a good one."
he took a long time delivering this joke. we even transfered trains together to finish it. eventually i got to my stop and i bid them farewell. he made me promise that i'd pass along the pirate joke.