a heart with a twist of lemon

with around 1,000 tv channels, including a number of on-demand channels, the television sucks away at my life daily. but i enjoy it. the other day i was watching CSI or Star Trek or some other dork show i am absorbed by, and during the commercial break an infomercial grabbed my attention. infomercials are notorious for making the most ridiculous things appear to be a neccesity. today it was not a knife that could cut through a pipe but a belt that makes chairs comfortable. it is called the backbelt. here is what i took from their website:

how back belt works

"Make every chair your favorite with Back Belt. With just a few simple pumps you can create the perfect amount of support and cushion. It adjusts easily to any waist size."

my mind was sent racing back to the early 90s. does that pump remind you of anything? take a close look at their website to see how the pump works in the video. the pump is pretty much the same design as this pump:

this technology was developed by reebok in 1989, and became all the rage in the early 90s as it even aided Dee Brown in winning the 1991 NBA slam dunk contest. they took the reebok pump shoe apart and wrapped it up in a backwards fanny pack to market it as a back relief product. now both players and spectators at sporting events can pump up before the big game to maximize comfort and performance. the pumpabilities seem endless and ridiculous.

Posted by david! at 07:19 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

it is 2.20am as i begin this entry. work at 8am. that is 5.40 hours. it would make sense to be sleeping right now. but being the intelligent person that i am, i decided that over my short vacation that it would be a good idea to sleep in till noon and stay up till who knows when. so i am not tired right now even though i should be and will be in a couple hours when i wake up.

another intelligent thing i have done recently was in a snowball brawl with my little bro. a snowball fight seemed like a good pregame to the christmas eve church service. i was chasing him down with snowball in hand as i rounded the punk rock van. it was above freezing so you would think there would be no ice on the driveway. yet i happen to hit the only patch of ice on the entire driveway, and it was only the size of a SNES console. so my pursuit comes to a crashing halt as i fall flat on my hands and knees and get slightly busted up. the fight is postponed until we reach church, at which point we both exchange decent hits with our frozen projectiles. Jesus has some good birthday party activities-snowball fights, singing and reflecting on life.

this just in! all of my grades have been reported for fall semester. and for only the second time in my college career, i have made the dean's list. just goes to prove that i am more focused and successful when i am overwhelmed. freshman year i made dean's list when i was taking 19 credits and involved in a number of clubs and activities, and this year i made it while going to school full time and working 3 jobs 41 hours a week.

it is now 2:36am. so long and goodnight.

Posted by david! at 02:18 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

and for extra credit, i present...

title: the faux-hawk collection
artist: me
medium: spraypaint on cardboard
size: a little smaller than 4.5" x 5.5" (each)

Posted by david! at 12:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

last night i took the punk rock van (PRV) out for an expensive drink of gasoline. as PRV and i neared the exit ramp another car behind us began agressively hugging our backside. at the stoplight this car pulled along side of us. it was one of those ugly scions that look like a box on wheels. now i am not denying the boxy features of the PRV, but anything more rounded in a van and it would be perfect for a soccer mom. the PRV pulls off boxy, the scion does not. the scion looks very unnatural while the PRV is much easier on the eyes. the driver of this scion must have realized the superiority of the boxy stylings of the PRV, because she gave me the most evil glare as we stood idly at the stoplight. her eyes became green with envy. when the stoplight turned the color of her eyes, the scion raced off in a fit, as if trying to make up for its poor design with speed. if the scion could go fast that would be beneficial, since fast things are harder to see and i would prefer not to see a scion. but a large wall is more aerodynamic than a scion. the PRV would have smoked the scion in a race but unfortunatly we had to turn into the gas station. i apologize to anyone who owns a scion and had to read this, but why would you buy a scion?

Posted by david! at 02:39 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

tonight i went to practice with the Hope Community Church Christmas choir. everyone at the church was encouraged to join the choir. everyone who can read music or mimic the people near them could join. so i joined. i decided to be a tenor. it is kind of annoying that tenors never really get the melody. it reminds me of when i played cello in grade school orchestra and the violins always got the best parts. so i tried to play violin for a while before returning to the cello. i was actually quite talented at the cello until i quit that in jr high to take up guitar and become a rock star. then in HS i switched to bass guitar since the band we formed had an over abundance of guitar players and no bass players. and i even sang in that band. which brings us back to the original topic. i will be singing in the HCC Christmas choir.

come check out one of the two performances, and sing along. all to celebrate the birth of Christ. everyone is welcome.

Date: Sunday, Dec 11th
Time: 9am and 11am
Location: Hope Community Church 707 - 10th Ave S., Minneapolis, MN 55415

Posted by david! at 12:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

7.45am, my first alarm goes off. i poke my finger through the blinds on the window near my bed. a quick peek and i can see the cold, but it was no suprise, weather.com told me it was going to be in the negatives today. i wrap myself back in my sheet, 3 blankets and quilt. my bed offers bliss. my eyes close and i relax.

8.00am, alarm number 2 interupts my peace. yes it is still cold out. yes i still want to stay in my bed. no i don't want to leave my bed to walk in the cold to go to class. thoughts form inside my brain...do i have to go to class today? what would i really miss? i should prolly stay in my warm bed and keep sleeping. so for the moment, i return to my dreaming.

8.15am, alarm number 3. this alarm business is getting old. it takes about 20 minutes to walk my 9.05am class. logic says i should prolly start getting ready soon. but i resist the temptress named logic and close my eyes, knowing that alarm number 3 is the final alarm. quantity of alarms does not equal quality of awakeness. i am only going to rest my eyes and not actually fall asleep.

9.30am, i bounce up in a panic knowing that i did not just rest my eyes. i see the clock, i am late for class! maybe i just shouldn't go. it is cold out anyways. then my mind meets my body in its awake state and i analyze the clock again. my clock protested daylight savings so it is an hour ahead, it is only 8.30am. no need to reset the clock, it is just extra ready for spring. it will be correct again then.

i throw on a couple layers of clothes, my huge grandpa jacket, a hat, a scarf, and some bum gloves/mittens. i select the appropriate music for the weather, hot hot heat. a positive to the subzero weather is that i walk faster and upon reaching the destination i am greeted by the most wonderful feeling of warm. and i know that my warm bed is waiting to swallow me in covers when i finish the day and return home.

Posted by david! at 10:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)