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March 30, 2006

please take a ticket

sleep is for slackers. i estimate that i have gotten about 35 hours of sleep in the past seven days. it has all been worth it though. fancy tables and charts show that productivty is up 43.7%. that is actually a number i made it up. but the fact i made it up proves my productivity. numbers look smart.

right now i am working in the ticket booth at the whole music club. i hand out tickets and stamp hands. some people sigh about the stamp. they must not like washing hands. perhaps someone famous or beautiful once touched their hand and they made one of those promises, the one where you never wash your hands.

there is a sign for the ticket booth but someone mispelt "ticket" as "kissing." occupational hazard. it is almost as bad as getting paid for listening to music. we also have some nice red mood lighting. the chalkboard walls in the booth shake from the music. little sketchings have gathered on the walls over the months/years. some dudes face, a boombox and the number for papa john's. there is also some instructions scrawled beside the power outlet, "insert fork here->". once i find a stick of chalk i will change the instructions to say spoon, that way no one will poke their eye out.

March 27, 2006

it's a hard HOC life. for us.

it appeared as if the HOCs returned to their old ways of being shot down by the mercy rule. the opposition scored the first 4 goals of the game. but with :30 seconds remaining in the first half the HOCs finally struck and put in a goal. if there were locker rooms, the HOCs would be heading to the locker rooms with the momentum.

the second half began and the HOCs kept strong. we rocketed two more goals into the net. the score was now 4-3. there was a glimmer of hope for the HOCs first tie, or even a win! but then those hopes were dashed as the opposition responded with 2 goals of their own. we put in one more goal before the games end for a respectable 6-4 loss.

HOCs record: 0-7-0

March 21, 2006

HOC and load

(before i begin, i must apologize to those loyal HOC fans who have been left wondering on the team's status the past two weeks. two weeks ago i did not attend the game so i was not able to report on the outcome. i found out tonight that we lost by the mercy rule again. last week was spring break so there was no game. so no suprises, those were saved for tonight. the HOCs record coming into tonight was 0-5-0)

it was another late game tonight, 11.15pm. the campus had long since gone to bed. it was quiet. even the wind decided to take the night off. overall not good conditions for a team still trying to take off. the first half ended like any other HOCs game. we were down 3-0. tonight was different however. we were not going to be shot down with the mercy rule. perhaps it was the goofball halftime pep talk. no one knows. but the second half we came out firing. after 2 quick goals we found ourselves only down 1, but in our excitement we allowed a fluke goal. score 4-2. the HOCs continued their assault to pull back within one but they followed with another goal, 5-3. we scored one final goal with 30 seconds remaining but then the other team dinked around with the ball wasting our chances to tie.

but it was a step in the right direction as the HOCs scored more than 1 goal and did not fall to the mercy rule.

HOCs record: 0-6-0 (very consistent)

March 15, 2006

cash in the chips

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now see what happens when you beat me at sequence after watching the movie walk the line. i go drugged up johnny cash style on the board, cards and chips.

March 13, 2006

spring brrrrrrrrreak

can you find the white vehicle? Image hosting by Photobucket

pretty cool that spring break started with a blizzard. Image hosting by Photobucket

don't worry. this chair will live to see another day. Image hosting by Photobucket

(photos taken by roommate tom)

March 11, 2006

office in space

at my marketing job, i am paid for ideas. pretty sweet deal. my fellow marketing partner in crime (ryan) and i were sitting at our computers last thursday when a brilliant scheme dawned upon us. prank call the designers.

the marketing assistants and graphic designers are seperated by one of those carpeted cubicle walls and a handful of filing cabinets, so this plan would require a great deal of stealth. i sent myself on a reconnaissance mission to acquire the number from the digital readout on their phone. as soon as i returned we began hatching a brilliant story, believable yet still out there.

*ring*
(ryan and i hear through the carpeted wall a dispute over which designer is to answer the phone)
*ring*
toni: design and marketing this is toni.
ryan:ahhhh...yes. this is peter from the uh institute of technology. do you guys design things?
toni:yeah.
ryan:ok good. we are uhh having this event, and we were wondering if you could design goldy gopher in a robot suit...and umm put him on mars?
toni:ummm...can i put you on hold for a second?
ryan:sure.

(meanwhile ryan and i overhear toni replaying the entire conversation to the other designers, referring to some crazy nerd guy. they tell her to give peter our bosses number.)

toni:hey um, you are going to have to talk to our boss, would you like her number?
ryan:yeah that would be wonderful.

the conversation ends like normal phone calls end and then ryan and i wander over to the designer area like giddy little school boys. they are in the middle of conversing on how odd the phone call was. i interupt:

me:what did this crazy guy sound like?
toni:really nerdy!
me:you know, i bet ryan could do a great impression of a really nerdy guy.

their faces become very serious as it all comes together. at first they are upset as to how we had them fooled, but then we all laugh as to how out of the ordinary it was. and so this story ends like many great sit coms of the 90s. everyone laughs over some obscure lesson learned.

March 6, 2006

farewell kirby

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kirby puckett introduced me to the minnesota twins, baseball and the world of sports. the shirt i wore as a small child hangs in my room. he will be missed.

March 3, 2006

a clown vs the king

ronald mcdonald, you are only a back up jester in the king's meatnormous kingdom. chicken selects would cross a road to catch a glimpse of the superior chicken fries. fast food is not healthy. some try to wuss out and hide that, while others just serve it up like it is.

long live burger king!
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some people lead. others just get laughed at.