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July 29, 2006

sweat it all out

last month was drool, this month is all about sweat.

sweating is a funny thing. it is like you are springing leaks everywhere. or you are a sweat waterfall. you sweat when you're nervous, you sweat when its hot. lately my sweat has been the latter. the temps have been basking in the 90s with humidty pushing it into the 100s. so i sit outside on patio chairs trying to chill with people and my butt gets all sweaty. i drive around the punk rock van with the busted A/C and my back gets all sweaty. i just stand outside and my face gets sweaty. good thing i have eyebrows to deflect the sweat from flooding my eyes.

close twins games also make me sweat. they just lost two to detroit and during the game i sweated because it was close and at the end of the games i sweat in frustration. this post has the word sweat in it a lot. perhaps i should switch it up with the word perspiration.

why are armpits the only place we try to prevent sweating? if i rubbed deodorant all over would i no longer sweat? perhaps that is the secret of girls not sweating. they glisten or glow or something.

July 28, 2006

yip yip

i promise i won't let my blog get too youtube heavy but i couldn't pass up this classic. it was going around the work email today. just further evidence that advertising is one of the greatest creative environments.

July 22, 2006

skate or die

work last week was most busy. it was also most awesome. so pretty much it was the mostest everything. amanda and i presented some sweet ideas to a bunch of creatives. it went well and felt good. we are learning from some very smart people. they are also fun. someone should make a word that means fun and smart. like smun or fart. sorry, i had to.

thinking creatively at great length about ice cream, golf and taxes can wear out your brain. and the creative floor has a community skateboard. so i keep my mind fresh by perfecting my skateboard skills. back in the day i knew some killer moves on tony hawk pro skater but busting em out in real life aint so easy. all i can do is go forward, i can't even turn well. i may be a poser but it is a ton o fun. much like those barrels of monkeys. skateboarding on carpet is much easier than cement. there are no bumps and instead of huge gashes you get carpet burn. rad.

skateboarding is not a crime. later skater.

July 19, 2006

share me

i apologize for the lack of posts. but you will probably have to wait until the weekend for another substantial entry. right now most all of my creative energy is going into projects at work. these are really exciting times for me at work, so i guess you will have to share me. this video should keep you occupied in the meantime.

someone please buy me a digital video camera and i promise that i will create my own videos like this.

July 12, 2006

project runaway with me

the world of advertising has given me an even greater appreciation for creative thought. working at an agency is supercalifragilisticexpialidociously amazing. i sit around searching my brain for ideas, jotting the good, bad and ugly thoughts down on paper in the form of stick figures and chicken scratch.

television allows me to see how other creative professionals spew beauty from the mind. much like the tattoo programs i follow, i have a fancy for Project Runway on Bravo. so i anxiously potatoed out on my couch to watch the premiere of season 3 tonight.

this season should be killer. there is a girl, katherine, from minneapolis, so hopefully she rocks out for this hip city. hardcore dude with a tattoo on his throat should be fun to watch with his grunge style. but i am most excited for the beautiful ms alison kelly (seen above). i decided that she may be my new girlfriend, dethroning reigning champion girlfriend, kristen kreuk. alison is a self-described victorian pop punk rocker, with the face of an angel.

so alison, when you get this message, look me up. we can sit around, have amazing ideas and paint the town red.

July 8, 2006

based upon actual events

this is the story of a boy and a girl. the two were very shy but every so often they would step out of their shells.

one day the boy and the girl discovered that they were both deeply in love with milk. so intense was this love that they decided to purchase a cow. the girl named the cow hidalgo and the two were content as they had fresh milk every day.

but hidalgo grew very shy as he was raised by a pair of introverts. the boy and girl could see the cow was growing sad and lonely. this was no good because the upset hidalgo made sour milk.

so the boy wandered into the forest and caught a bird, which he named kuzco. hidalgo and kuzco became great friends. kuzco would ride upon the back of hidalgo and hidalgo was no longer lonely.

the milk was better than ever. sometimes hidalgo even made chocolate milk. so the boy and girl were pleased. and everyone lived happily ever after.

July 1, 2006

battle wound

hunting pizza is dangerous. the three meat pizza was deeply sedated after being put on ice. my stomach was hungry and the pizza looked tasty. so i threw it in the oven inferno, set the timer and waited patiently. 17 minutes passed and i pulled the pizza out. my stomach purred at the sight. i reached for the pizza cutter and began cutting the pizza to pieces. before i finished, the pizza spewed up some hot lava sauce onto my cutting finger. the singe set off a reaction in my brain to use my tongue to remove the projectile, but then my tongue felt the full effect of the burning sauce. so after soothing my finger and tongue under some freeze water, i used my thermodynamic cooling breath to subdue the pizza. i devoured the pizza like a car to godzilla. and despite ruining my chances at becoming a professional hand model, i was able to satisfy my stomachs hunger.