10/26/07, Welcome
Well finally I walked out of a conducting episode and felt like everything I practiced went the way I wanted it to. I have decided not to take for granted the skill of great conductors anymore. When I watch myself in the tape, I see that I have grown in confidence and my pattern is stronger. I also see that I appear to try to conduct like a person whose arms are in a body cast. I never understood how much less control I had over the choir and my pattern when my arms were reaching out so far. Not only did I feel more in control, but I also didn't get as tired when I pulled my arms closer to my body. I am still working really hard on gaining left-hand independence and that is visible as well. I seem to pulse my left hand with the beat of my right hand when I am trying to use it independently, especially on crescendos. I wish every piece were as easy to conduct as Welcome, but I know that is very unrealistic. The most I can hope for is that my success on Welcome will eventually be brought to all other pieces. My task for this week is to continue working on independence and also to figure out a comfortable way to conduct so my right shoulder doesn't feel like rocks are moving around in it.