I'm confident that the topic that I will talk about in this blog post not only will be remembered after five years, but also will have been continuously reminded during five years. As many sexually active, unmarried men and women look for their soul mates, I will become 28 years old 5 years from now and be actively looking for a partner, with whom I will spend rest of my life. Therefore, building a good relationship will be my primary interest. Professor Simpson talked about relationship and attraction between man and woman, and focused on three essential components to build a new relationship. One of the first elements was "proximity"; physical nearness is important for new relationship formation. In other words, if I'm interested in a woman, I should try to get around her so that I can face her frequently. Second element was "similarity"; having similar interests is important to attract people. This makes sense because people are often attracted each other when they have similar interests and they would feel resemblance between them. Also, having similar interests would give them more topics to talk about. Third element is "reciprocity", which means rule of give and take. Even though reciprocity is not completely required for making a relationship, it is important to build deeper relationship. Reciprocity includes not only physical substances such as presents, but also personal information. Sharing and disclosing personal information or stories often brings about intimacy. I will never forget these three important principles. I will always try to be near to someone whom I like and learn about what she likes. Once, when the relationship is formed, I will talk about my personal stories as well as listen to her stories so that we can build deeper relationship.
choi0308: April 2012 Archives
General people might think it is safer in company of many other than of small number of people. They reason that if there are many people around them, many people would help them when they are in dangerous or emergency situations. However, it turns out that it might be more dangerous in many people than in small number of people. Bystander nonintervention or bystander effect is social psychological phenomenon that occurs when people do not offer any means of help in an emergency situation to the victim when other, especially many, people are present. Two famous cases clearly represent bystander nonintervention and show that being in many numbers can be more dangerous than being in few numbers. On March 13, 1964 28-year-old Catherine Genovese was stabbed near her apartment in New York City. She was screaming and crying for help for about 30 minutes in front of her apartment, no one tried to help her and even did not bother to call the police. According to neighbors, more than 30 of her neighbors heard the scream. On October 23, 2009, a 16-year-old girl was raped by group of people when about 20 bystanders stood and watched. Surprisingly, no one helped her and even called the police even though many of them have cellphones. Darley and Latane suggested that two main factors explain bystander nonintervention. The first is pluralistic ignorance, which means that people cannot recognize the situation as an emergency because they assume that nobody is responding to the situation. The second is diffusion of responsibility, which means that people feel less responsible when more people are present in the situation. The presence of many other individuals makes them think that other people also can help if they don't help victims. However, I think that it would be safer in many numbers if people in dangerous situation know effective ways to ask for help. First, it is important to let other people know that he or she is in dangerous situation and needs immediate help. Second, one of effective ways to ask for help is to point out directly to nearby bystander and ask for help. It makes not only the pointed bystander recognize the situation but also feel more responsible to help.