Biting
When I was in elementary school, I bit somebody at recess one
day and I had to go to the principals office along with my
victim. The principal was a really nice guy, and he didn't
yell or anything, probably because I was like 2 foot 6 at that
point in my development and the strong breeze that yelling
generates could've sent my meager frame across the room. But
he asked me if I knew what the most dangerous kind of animal
bite was. Now, this is the type of bullshit question that he's trying to
answer just by asking. (Like, "Isn't
that the true meaning
of Christmas?" kind of stuff). So, his answer was humans, but
I was thinking, I don't know, maybe shark, a shark bite? Because,
you know, I've never been bitten by a shark, but they do have
awfully sharp teeth, meant for killing live animals. Or crocodile!
Yes, it has to be crocodile. They can generate so much force!
You'll never escape. Human bite? Give me a break. Are you looking
at this kid? He has a freaking red mark! Why don't you ask him if
he'd trade that for a shark bite. The absolute
worst case scenario is spreading disease, and lets face it, I was
more likely to catch disease from that chomp-inviter than
he was from me.
Posted by mill1991 at May 11, 2004 06:40 AM