July 5, 2004

4th of July

So, I went to Milwaukee and Green Bay this weekend to visit friends and family for the 4th of July holiday. A few people mentioned to me that I look skinnier than the last time they saw me. I've probably lost some weight since I stopped eating meat, but I didn't think it was noticeable. One person even used the word "gaunt" to describe my face. I described her face as "badly bruised" after she insulted me. However, since I'm very self-conscious about my appearance, I've taken note. I stopped at 6 different McDonald's on the way back to the Twin Cities and got Big Macs. Also, since it will take a while to gain the weight back, I'm going to wear a fat suit in the meantime. The model I've selected should make me appear about 400 pounds, which will give me the appearance of an average American.

I don't see what's so bad about being a little gaunt. It gets me one step closer to my goal of marrying the anorexic Olson sister (see last post). Also, with all the recent hoopla about so many young people and Americans in general being obese, I'm just doing my part to skew the average back towards healthy.

Its not really fair that women get to have such great anorexic role models in the entertainment world, while us men are stuck with the overweight sitcom star. I don't think Hollywood producers realize the negative self image they're giving impressionable young men. Women get Lara Flynn Boyle, Calista Flockhart, and Courtney Cox - healthy, physically fit females who can easily fit through door frames. Men get George Costanza, Kevin James (King of Queens), and Dennis Franz, three guys whose attractiveness score is a combined 4 on a scale of 1 to 10. The only skinny men allowed on television are on Queer Eye, which I find difficult to watch. I know its good for me to use 7 different skin creams before, during, and after showering. I'm just saying I also have to eat, work, and sleep during a typical day. Posted by mill1991 at July 5, 2004 9:50 PM

Comments

Tim, I re-evaluated my position on you being vegetarian and dropping weight. First, we can finally fill in that vacant 119 lb. spot on the wrestling team. Second, I believe that it has probably made you more spry, which will proove to be advantageous if you ever decide to be a bullfighter.

Posted by: Matt Hensler at July 5, 2004 10:33 PM

Hey, you should talk, Hensler. You looked like you've dropped quite a few pounds yourself. You're going to be my opponent pretty soon if you don't start drinking from the grease repository on the George Foreman grill like we used to do back in the ol' college days. Now, I'm going to look up the word 'spry' to see if its an insult or not.

Posted by: Tim at July 5, 2004 11:12 PM