December 8, 2004

This is all I got

People sometimes say things like, "Boy, I wish I had a third hand right now." I think if they did have three hands, they would always just be wishing for a fourth one.

I need posters for my cubicle. I was thinking it would be cool to just have a poster of myself hanging on the wall, like Master P or basically anyone on MTV cribs. But it would probably be cheaper just to get a mirror.

Today on my drive in to work, there was a guy just walking in the street, and I said to myself, out loud, "What the hell? Get out of the road, Slappy McDickslap." I just thought that was funny. Linz proved years ago that names of this format are inherently funny when he invented the pseudonym Nutty McAssgravy. The ingredients seem to be a first name ending in "y", a last name starting with "Mc", and a vulgar word thrown in somewhere.

You know how if you do a bunch of math problems, your brain starts to hurt, and you're like, "Man, I gotta take a break from math."? I wonder if that's why we sleep? Because the rest of your brain is like, "Screw this, I need a break."

Gay men don't die, they just flame out. Posted by mill1991 at December 8, 2004 1:59 PM | TrackBack

Comments

you should get a poster of a kitten telling you to hang in there.

Posted by: Stephanie at December 8, 2004 6:03 PM

Or a frog grabbing the neck of a goose thats eating him, and the caption says "Never give up."

Posted by: Tim at December 8, 2004 10:22 PM

or a bear telling you how beary special you are.

Posted by: Stephanie at December 8, 2004 11:46 PM

Those posters that have daily reasons to get drunk always struck me as classy.

Posted by: Jim at December 8, 2004 11:50 PM