February 23, 2005
Really really really really really really really annoying me about you, you see
Today's person that annoyed me: The woman in front of me in line at Noodles who ordered buttered noodles.
What is the point of going to a restaurant if you are going to order buttered noodles? That's like watching The Matrix, with commercials, on TBS when you already own the DVD. That's like going to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory and passing up a drink from the chocolate river because you just had a chocolate Slim-Fast. It's like deciding you want a pet but are content with the bacteria that digest food in your stomach. Buttered noodles is to pasta what a toothless midget is to prostitution. Ordering buttered noodles at a restaurant is like going to a Three Tenors concert and requesting "Row, row, row your boat." Even if they were to sing it in round form with three part harmony, it's still not that great. The only reason it's on the menu is so that if a guy wants to go out to eat with his retarded brother, there is something on the menu his brother can be convinced to eat.
Posted by mill1991 at February 23, 2005 11:32 AM
That reminds me a lot of a friend of mine who INSISTS upon ordering a plain (no lettuce, no tomatoes) grilled chicken sandwhich whenever we used to go to this Mexican restaurant in Fargo. I mean, she would ASK to go to this particular restaurant and then order dry chicken!
What do YOU get at Noodles? I'm partial to the pasta fresca.
SandWICH. Dammit! Why can't I ever spell that word?
First off, that line about the pet bacteria is one for the books.
Second off, I used to know this guy in undergrad who disliked all food except grilled cheese sandwiches and french fries - his roommates attested to the fact that he ate nothing but those two cuisines. When a bunch of people would get together to go out for fast food, he'd just get fries. The funny thing was that he was such a discriminating connoisseur of fast food fries that somedays he'd be in the mood for BK, other days he'd have a hankering for McDonalds, and once in a blue moon, Wendy's was what he craved. But he always just got the fries.
Third off, I am going to post later about a midget. It's a funny coincidence that you and I will be posting entries containing the word "midget" on the same day.
Kaitlin - I also am partial to Pasta Fresca, but I also like penne rosa, pasta cavatoppi, and mushroom stroganoff. I've tried a few of the Asian dishes but they're just not that good. Oh yeah. I eat at Noodles A LOT.
Jim - Thanks. I look forward to your entry on midgets, which will undoubtedly be provocative and comment-inducing.
For all fans of this website, I thought I would post the pain-stakingly thought up recipe to a dish I like to call "Special Treat". The only reason I do this is because Tim ate the hell out of this when he came to visit in Milwaukee--honestly, he forced us at gunpoint to take him to an Open Pantry at 3 in the morning in the Milwaukee ghetto just so he could get 2/3 of the ingredients.
Take 3-4 spoonfuls of cream cheese and put them in a bowl
Heat for 15 seconds (careful, it's not that hot!)
Pour salsa around the cream cheese and stir a bit
Dip tortilla chips in and enjoy!
More recipes such as this will be published in a book that hits the shelves in June - keep an eye out for it
Hilarious. I couldn't agree more. I wonder how much they charged her for that bowl of buttered noodles.
I've got a friend who gets one slice of American cheese and one slice of turkey on white everytime we go to Subway. It drives me nuts.
I get buttered noodles almost every time I go there! They just don't have anything else of intereset to me at noodles. I mean you go to place called "noodles" you might as well have noodles. Plus they're not just noodles, they have BUTTER (aka God's special sauce). The only thing that needs to be added is chicken and siranch sauce.
Also, I don't really consider noodles "a restaurant to visit and get nice food" It's more of a "place you go because you've been coding all day and if you eat one more burrito from Chipotle your colon will declare war on you."
Alex, I'm surprised you even get a burrito when you go to Chipotle. Won't they serve you a buttered tortilla? :)
I got the Chipotle buttered tortilla once, except without the butter, but then this guy in line behind me started laying into me about Willy Wonka's chocolate river or some such shit. I wasn't really paying attention because I was totally fixated on the doughy treat I was about to devour. Someday, I might try some of that weird colorful stuff that everybody else seems to like on their tortillas.
ha ha ha, this whole thing is a crackup. I found it while looking for a recipe for a buttered tortilla because those are the only things Ive got at the moment but only just realized olive oil is all Ive got, not butter.
Buttered tortillas rock. Buttered noodles are okay w/ some parmesan. Or sriracha I guess.