GWSSblog

I'm really freaked out

2008-04-08T17:59:49Z

I grew up in a pretty religious family. We went to church every Sunday, my Dad was involved in the church leadership, and my Mom would read us devotions every morning before school. Then my Dad died, and everything changed. I didn’t really know what I thought about church, and especially the church that our family attended. I refused to go to our church youth group anymore because I hated it. It was full of a bunch of kids who all had the same goal in life: getting married. Sick. I have watched all of my peers in that church get married by age 20, and start popping out kids a few years later. Not for me. I wanted to go to school, get a job, and then consider marriage and kids. Well, my sophomore year of college, I met my boyfriend Nate. Our relationship became serious, and last fall, after 2 years of dating, decided to move in together.

]]> I grew up in a pretty religious family. We went to church every Sunday, my Dad was involved in the church leadership, and my Mom would read us devotions every morning before school. Then my Dad died, and everything changed. I didn’t really know what I thought about church, and especially the church that our family attended. I refused to go to our church youth group anymore because I hated it. It was full of a bunch of kids who all had the same goal in life: getting married. Sick. I have watched all of my peers in that church get married by age 20, and start popping out kids a few years later. Not for me. I wanted to go to school, get a job, and then consider marriage and kids. Well, my sophomore year of college, I met my boyfriend Nate. Our relationship became serious, and last fall, after 2 years of dating, decided to move in together.
Of course this was not great news for my mother, and she still randomly calls me to tell me how sinful my “shacking up�? with my boyfriend is. I, on the other hand, strongly believe that I could never marry someone that I haven’t lived with. She begs me to “at least become engaged�? and even offers to let me wear my grandmother’s old wedding band until Nate can afford to buy me one himself. Somehow, no matter how many times I tell her I don’t even want to be engaged, she cannot accept this fact. She loves telling me about how she thinks that getting married is the “right and Christian�? thing to do. For some reason she can’t comprehend the fact that I do not want my life to in any way resemble that of those girls at her church. I don’t believe that getting married so young is the right thing for me to do. So many people in my Mom’s generation got married when they were 19, 20, and 21 and now over 60% of them are divorced. Apparently, this is of no concern to her.
I don’t wish to judge anyone who decides that marriage is right for them; all I am saying is that it is not right for me right now. I do not believe that living with my boyfriend makes me a “bad�? person in any way. I wish that my mother would not judge me so harshly. She told me the other day that my living with Nate is “a big family secret�?, that it is embarrassing for her, and that I am setting a poor example for my younger siblings. Personally, I don’t care who knows, I am not embarrassed, and I hope my siblings will be as careful as I when choosing who they want to spend the rest of their lives with. I am extremely afraid of getting divorced; it fucks so many things up. I have so many friends whose parents got divorced, and it made their lives complicated. I would rather end up with a broken heart because I lived with a guy and we didn’t get married, than with a broken home.
I think that the extremely different viewpoints of my mother and I on this issue, are very interesting. I want the basis of my upcoming video project to reflect this generational difference. I also want to include my grandmother’s thoughts on love and marriage in the project. I cannot wait to see how dramatically our family’s opinion on this topic has changed throughout the generations. My grandmother was married when she was very young, as was my mother. Neither of them had the opportunity to go to college, as I have had, and I know that this has played a huge role in shaping my understanding of the topic. I am by far the most liberal and the most feminist of the three of us. This one topic has brought to light many issues in my life that I struggle with. Ten years ago, I am sure that I would have told you that I would be married by now, and interestingly enough my 11 year-old sister constantly tells me that I’m old and should be married! I wonder what she’ll think about that when she’s a 22 year-old college senior! I’m sure there is much she has yet to learn and discover.

VOTE Ladies!

2008-02-05T19:31:04Z

Today is caucus day, and I feel an urgent need to invite women to vote. Last semester I wrote my senior thesis on the American women's suffrage movement and suffrage poetry. When I think about those women who sacrificed so much so that I would have the opportunity to go to the polls today, how can I not? These women put their reputations on the line, they challenged the men in authority, they were imprisoned for protesting, and they were tied down and force-fed while they protested in prison. Ladies, if you had lived one lifetime ago (ONLY 90 YEARS!) you would not be allowed to vote but you would be expected to follow the law. The law made by those you did not even elect to office. So I plead with you today to exercise your rights and vote! Carrie Chapman Catt, Elizabeth Caty Stanton, Lucricia Mott, and so many others spent a lifetime working just so that you could cast that vote. Don't let them down, and don't let YOUR voice go unheard!

Barack Obama responds to the State of the Union

2008-01-29T09:41:07Z

So...

2008-01-29T05:32:12Z

This is a picture of me, doing what I love to do, whenever the chilly Minnesota air permits. Camping! Anytime I can squeeze in a camping trip around my very busy schedule, I do. I love everything about the outdoors; the smells, the quiet, roasting marshmallows and hotdogs around a roaring campfire, and being able to clear my mind of all the busyness that I have left behind at home. There is nothing more awe-inspiring than lying on my back in the middle of nowhere, looking at the millions of bright stars that I would never be able to see if I were in Minneapolis. It never fails to bring a tear to my eye. Anyways, my name is Christina and I will be graduating from the U after this semester. I am an English major and a GWSS minor. I love school (I know, I’m a nerd) and hope to teach high school English when I graduate. Eventually though, I would like to become a professor. I work 2 jobs and go to school full-time, so I am a very busy bee! I obviously love camping, but I also love to read, write, rock climb, scuba dive, take pictures, and play with my cats! I am very interested in politics and love to listen to Minnesota Public Radio. I am very liberal and am hoping that Barack Obama becomes the next president. I’m very chatty once I get going, which is why this entry is getting to be so long.

Week 1

2008-01-29T03:58:15Z

I remember sitting in the car as a young girl, annoyed with my father for listening to boring talk radio and bothering him to change the station. He and my mother loved listing to Rush Limbaugh, and consequently I was left bored with the assumption that something important was being discussed. Ironically enough, I myself am now addicted to listening to talk radio. Kerri Miller’s show on Minnesota Public Radio is one of the highlights of my morning. I love listening to the interesting guests that she always has on. She always provides her listeners with very stimulating and intellectual conversation, and is probably one of the smartest women I have ever heard speak. The stark contrast between these radio personalities is almost a bit shocking to me. I can’t believe that my mother would listen to (and like) someone who would refer to a feminist as a “feminazi�?. I have, since high school, identified myself as a feminist. I believe that most people should refer to themselves as such as well. Most people do not, however, because of the media ploy (that Jennifer Pozener refers to in her article as False Female Death Syndrome or (FDDS) to associate extremism with the word feminist. To Be Continued…