Being Strict isn't Always the Trick

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It is strange to think about how different my life would be had I been raised with a different parenting style or different parents altogether. It is hard to imagine because I believe my parents raised me the best they could. Of the three major parenting styles identified by Diana Baumrind--permissive, authoritarian, and authoritative--my parents mostly used a permissive style. From a young age, I was well behaved at home and in school, so it made sense for them to raise me this way. It allowed me to make my own decisions, and it was nice to know that my parents trusted me to do the right thing. Yes, I may have made some bad decisions, but I was able to learn and grow from these mistakes; mistakes I would not have had the opportunity to make had there been strict household rules, which are often associated with authoritarian parenting styles.

It may be a cliché for me to say that you need to make mistakes in order to learn, but I think it is true. By making mistakes I taught myself valuable life lessons that my parents couldn't have taught me. But while I feel that a permissive parenting style was perfect for myself, I know it is not the best for every child. Because of this, parents need to change the way they raise their child depending on the child's behavior.

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I really liked this post because you were able to incorporate the information you learned into your own life and how you were raised. I agree with your statement that you sometimes have to make mistakes in order to learn because I know in my life there are certain things I would not have fully learned without making mistakes.

I agree with you that the permissive parenting style is a good style for parents to use. It allows their children to make decisions for themselves and learn from the mistakes they make. It helps make the child more mature and more responsible. My parents also used the permissive style and I think that it helped me to reason better and make the right choices in my life.

I also find it amazing how different my life would have been with a different parenting style, my parents fit on the more authoritative side, I cant even imagine a different way of being raised. contrary to your belief on parenting methods i feel that each method has its pluses ans minuses, there isn't just one right way to raise a child.
very interestion post!

My parents are also permissive! Like you said, if my parents would have raised me in a different style it would not have been as effective. I have been able to make my own decisions and learn from whatever the outcome is! Really enjoyed reading your post!

I completely agree with your thoughts on parenting! My parents started out being authoritative, but as they grew to trust me, became much more permissive. Similar to yours, they let me make my own mistakes and learn from them. I do not think that being super strict is the right way to go at all! The chart you included is very helpful to understand the styles!

I definitely agree and can relate to you quite a bit. Though my mom was definitely more permissive than my dad, having the freedom to basically do what I want helped me learn more. I wholeheartedly believe that you grow by making mistakes and learning from them. I also think that giving children the freedom to make their own decisions helps them become individuals, but also decreases their chances of rebelling and getting into serious trouble. I mean, the thrill you get out of doing something against the rules is because you know that its against the rules, so if you have limited rules then there's not many ways to rebel.

The only thing I have to say about making mistakes and learning from them is that parents should allow their children the freedom to only make some mistakes. There are some mistakes that children should not have the freedom to make, because it can lead them into a life of alcohol and substance abuse, violence, or some other unfortunate circumstance. Permissiveness can only go so far.

This was a very interesting take on this however I do not agree. I think that while permissive may have worked for you, many children would do badly with this kind of parenting style. I agree with the articles that authoritative parenting style is the best because it adds support but also control that children need.

My parents also raised me in a permissive style. While I do think this worked well for me most of the time, I feel like a balance between permissive and authoritarian, authoritative, would probably be the best form of parenting. While my parents could trust me with many things, I also wish they were involved more in certain areas of my life, like schooling. I am a huge procrastinator and did not try as hard as I could in high school, and having parents that made sure I was doing my best and wasn't falling behind would have been better for me. Of course I would have hated it at the time, but parents should always do what is best for their children, even if they resent them for it.

Clever title! That, along with your pictures really made me want to read your post. I think that the way we are raised and parented has a bigger effect on the people we become than most people think. My parents were authoritative and I think they did the best job ever. There were rules, but they weren't ridiculous. I knew my parents genuinely loved and cared about me, so their rules didn't bother me -- I knew that they were given out of love and for my good.

Great job with describing the different types of parenting styles. I think my parents used more of an authoritative method, offering support and closely monitoring and setting rules. I think this worked very well for me based on how I turned out, however I can see how both of the other styles would work as well.

Great topic to post about, so often do you meet people and just from their demeanor can tell a lot about them. I think much of this goes all the way back to how they were raised, how their parents interacted with them and taught and enforced rules. The different parenting styles are very evident if you observe families at a mall, how the children behave reflects on the parenting a lot and it sad more people don't take this into account when raising a child.

I was raised in a very strict household, even so, I was able to make plenty of mistakes. For each mistake I suffered many consequences from my parents. Even if my parents were to not give me punishments I believe I would have still learned from my mistakes. I think my parents being so strict may have damaged our relationship a bit, this is why when I have kids I plan to raise them a completely different way than my parents raised me. Maybe you're right though about the part that different children should be raised differently. Your blog was super interesting to read!

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This page contains a single entry by david508 published on April 1, 2012 11:45 PM.

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