Why Do We Marry?

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Reasons for attraction to a certain individual is different across cultures, as well as within cultures. I recently was in India, and I learned many astonishing things about their different classes and marriage within them. I was working with low-class women, who were solely interested in finding a man who could provide for them and their future children. One of my friends was even being physically abused by her husband, but she thought it was a small price to pay for having food on the table every night for herself and her daughter. She does love her husband, but their relationship is very different from most couples living in the United States. Another Indian friend of mine is very wealthy, and he chose to have an arranged marriage. For him, marriage is an adventure of learning to love your spouse over time. Here is a picture of him at his wedding! Him and his wife had only seen each other a handful of times before the wedding. 377889_10150519719264665_507834664_10638267_1663394351_n.jpg

Although this is so different from what I believe marriage to be, I respect his views and understand the appeal of an arranged marriage. An article that compares arranged marriages in India with marriages of choice in America (download the PDF of the article from this link: http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/j.1556-6678.2005.tb00595.x/abstract), found that there was zero difference in marital satisfaction between the two groups.

What I'm getting at is there are many different studies about what makes people attractive and who individuals see as "fit to marry," but there will never be enough studies that include the reasons and characteristics of every relationship in the world. Love is love, and it can't be explained. I would even go so far as to say attraction cannot be explained either.

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Marriage is a very sacred ceremony and promise in all cultures and I believe that society today is downplaying how big of a deal divorce is. Our vows include "till death do us part" and while I know some people marry the wrong person, these kinds of phrases need to be taken more seriously.

Interesting! I think marriage is different from being in a relation with a special someone, for people have to live together, share the same life style and same willingness to have a good family. And people who are in a marriage have to have kind of responsibility to maintain the family. So, marry to someone that fit in one's life is important, for, again, marriage is different from being with one's girlfriend or boyfriend. All in all, this is a interesting blog! Nice job!

This is so cool that you have so much personal experience with this topic. I think that different cultures do value marriage in many different ways in the world and it is good to shine a light on that. Very interesting!

Great topic! I recently read an article on Yahoo! about an arranged marriage for a girl who was only 1 year old and the boy was only 3 years old. Today, the girl is 18 and the boy is 21, and they are the first couple in India to annul their arranged marriage. Very different than the US! Really cool how you pulled a personal experience into your topic!

http://shine.yahoo.com/healthy-living/child-bride-marriage-annulled-laxmi-sargara-hero-day-180800827.html

I personally think marriage is what you make of it. Everyone sees it differently and everyone has his or her values and beliefs. There is no right and wrong, and every one should be free to decide if they want to marry, who they want to marry….I just don’t agree with the woman that let he husband beat her. Other than that, I liked how you talked about your personal experience in your article. Good job!!

Just by saying the arranged marriage being an adventure, I gained some respect for it. I never really got it and kind of thought it was stupid to be honest. But you kind of showed me that there is a point to it. Great post! Very interesting!

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This page contains a single entry by smit6163 published on April 9, 2012 8:54 PM.

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