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June 30, 2004
from bad to worse...
ok so i had a problem. and someone tried to fix it. now it is 5 million times worse. perhaps one day i will tell you all about it. but it doesn't seem to be getting better.
oh but once it does get better i can be all "ha ha ha, isn't this sooooo funny!" but in the meantime...OH MY GOD!!! I FEEL LIKE KILLING MYSELF!
and it has to be super hot right now too, doesn't it. sad.
well what is there to look forward to? how about working at southdale tomorrow! woo woo!
and i want to go to pizza luce! oink oink.
Posted by piep0058 at 10:28 PM | Comments (0)
yes, today is big
sorry guys, i can't tell anyone. not now, not ever. well when i get back from vacation i will let you all know. i don't even know anything yet.
but chew on this for a while: frostbite, although quite painful, makes me laugh. does this make me a masochist?
Posted by piep0058 at 04:13 PM | Comments (0)
my futon!
ok so this is the futon i want.
now i know it looks plain...but...all my other furniture in my room is stainless steel. my refridgerator, my lamps, my trashcans...all stainless steel.
it's the new style. it's so simple. it looks really modern. and it's easy to clean and doesn't stain. stainless steel rocks!
in other news...today is a big day for me...i mean, we're talking HUGE. this day could alter the rest of my life. but i can't tell you
and i hate my fucking upstairs roommates. i have not done laundry in 2 weeks and they are in my way downstairs. fuck them.
Posted by piep0058 at 12:36 PM | Comments (3)
June 29, 2004
work sucks
actually my job is ok. i just would prefer to be on vacation. i am getting sick of answering the phones and having to deal with intolerant people. they really suck.
and tonight it's the kitty cat klub. fun! and i just found out i have to work the 4th at night. i was never really patriotic to begin with. so that's ok. but i kinda did wanna see the fireworks. oh well. sad!
moving on...so i have like a ton of money in my bank account right now! the numbers just keep on coming! and thanks to brent, i have an air matress now, which makes me want to sleep so much more...sigh...and i had to be in at 10 a.m. this morning. oh well, tomorrow morning will be a lot more fun and thursday morning as well!
and soon, soon, i will be back in st. louis for a whole week! oh my god i didn't think i would get a vacation...and technically people still have not filled in for me. but i need someone. i'm just going to go crazy if i can't get someone to take my shifts.
Posted by piep0058 at 05:13 PM | Comments (2)
June 28, 2004
~ whoops ~
so i forgot to tell you why it was such a sad day in uptown...well i went to get a futon. and they're expensive! i'll be sure to post a picture of the one i want as soon as i determine the one i want.
but then i spent some money on an awesome shirt at josi wert! ha! that rhymes!
Posted by piep0058 at 06:05 PM | Comments (2)
a sad day in uptown...
ok so let me catch up on things that have been going on:
so i actually did get to ride the light rail thingy, but not that much because it was late on saturday night. i wish it would go faster in downtown. who cares! run over people! it'd be nice to hit a homeless person with a baby carriage full of aluminum cans. but i'm gonna ride it with brett later tonight and experience the WHOLE trip over to ft. snelling.
so i saw fahrenheit 9/11 yesterday night...yeah...ummm, it was very thought provoking. ok, now everyone should go see it. but is michael moore really telling the truth? i'm not talking about the things on camera, if they're true or not (but he did say saddam has never attacked any american...but he did attack us in the gulf war; well after we got involved...it wasn't directly towards us). But he does put his lens through his bias. It's like the real world, sort of. they only see a few hours of "reality." we all know michael moore isn't telling the whole story. but he is telling a story, and it's a story that's good enough for a discussion. And i guess it would be nice if the bush administration (although they're not obligated) to respond to the documentary's accusations...because they seem to be valid in my mind.
perhaps i'll talk with my parents about it.
and oh. i'm not going to visit saudi arabia anytime soon. israel is my limit. maybe lebanon, but nowhere else in the middle east.
Posted by piep0058 at 06:02 PM | Comments (0)
June 26, 2004
500 lesbians!
so i just saw more "queer women" than i have seen in my whole life. i just got off work at the loring pasta bar and walked down to get my check at the kitty cat klub. there was a line that stretched out the door all the way to the pasta bar. needless to say, i was not at all going to fight some butchy dykes into the bar. so i will just pick up my check on monday or something. (if i have a check at all...)
but other than that, this butt sex holiday (as Atom likes to put it) has been pretty good. went to pride for the first time--that was ok. i wasn't really amused to see me so much in pictures from the gay frat, but whatever. i really liked the pictures of myself though...maybe i should get josh to get them. there were some good ones with cathal and me and brett in them. but seriously, why was i in there so much?
someone just sent me this. it's cute.
some people need to learn some manners. they come in demanding so to sit whenever they want and to make reservations whenever they want. i mean, when they're in my restaurant they will do what i tell them. i found myself becoming quite bitchy with customers. i don't like this policy of reservation taking. it fucks with everything. the old system was fine. b-mez and sky bar people came in at 6, and we typically filled those areas up around 8. and now i have to make sure tables are reserved. and then people just don't show up for reservations, which makes the whole idea of reserving tables futile. and now i'm tired.
i really wanna go on the light rail tomorrow! it's like a roller coaster or something that's really boring. but still, it's like my own piece of europe.
Posted by piep0058 at 11:55 PM | Comments (6)
oh one more thing
oh i forgot to add this: as i was typing there was this wierd asian girl sitting on my bed-floor (i'm too poor to afford a real bed, so i sleep on the floor). and then i drove her home in brent's mustang. i thought she lived over like in stadium village or somewhere that's actually far away. but she lives 6 blocks away! sad! and she couldn't walk the 6 blocks!
ryan and the other girl are going to have sex tonight. tsk tsk.
Posted by piep0058 at 03:13 AM | Comments (3)
strange condition
so i got to drive a mustang tonight, all by myself. tee hee! it was a change from my silly jeep grand cherokee. thanks brent, you're the best.
and i also went to tonic for the first time tonight. i admit, i had low expectations. but i was impressed nonetheless. more comments later, i'm about to go to bed.
and i just drove the mustang around dinkytown. oh it was awesome. loved it. i think i might get a black one. those look evil. a big black mustang...oh hell, i'm just gonna get a big black bmw. those are cool...
well, more chit chat later when i have the time. gosh i have a lot to write but just haven't had the time to write! i feel so cool now that i have a social life.
Posted by piep0058 at 03:04 AM | Comments (0)
June 25, 2004
more anger
so i've found something to remind me why other people piss me off sometimes. i am usually such a nice person, very calm and quiet. rarely does anything make me mad.
the reason to hate people once again.
of course, as much as i would like to, i can't let myself get worked up over such injustices. i know this is a small (yet somehow vocal) group of people. it's my hope that a majority of others do not view it as such.
perhaps i'll say more, but i have to work.
Posted by piep0058 at 12:51 PM | Comments (0)
June 24, 2004
the day off
yay, first day off in like 20 days or so. it felt good. spend most of the day with brent.
excellent review of Taste of Scandinavia, by the way. i went there first thing and loved it.
then on to lake calhoun, were i canoed for about 2 hours. i got to see 2 girls capsize, which was sad. they lost all their nice equipment. but at the same time, seeing 2 dripping wet girls walk ashore was pretty funny.
saw some nice furniture to decorate my room with from pier 1 and urban outfitters.
then i cooked some dinner, and we headed over to clay and andrew's to watch the pilot for Lost with Ian Somerhalder...omg omg omg hot hot hot, i love his eyes....*sigh*
and now i'm back, completely satisfied and ready to go back to work. ahhhh, i'm only going to work 20 more days at caribou coffee. i've settled it.
but i'm tired now, let me talk more later...
Posted by piep0058 at 11:54 PM | Comments (0)
June 23, 2004
so tired...
so i woke up this morning with that gooey crust all over my eyes. ew, nasty! i think all the smoke in my workplace is getting to me.
well i'm not going to waste today away...i'm gonna actually do something...like make oatmeal and go outside.
Posted by piep0058 at 10:47 AM | Comments (0)
super fast computer
yay! no more spyware. if any of you want to fix your computer check out http://www.adaware.com or something...i didn't pay for the program but i think if you go through that website you're supposed to pay for it. but i was sneaky and got an old version. and it works fine.
and i am tired, and do not have the energy to go on a rant right now.
Posted by piep0058 at 02:20 AM | Comments (6)
June 22, 2004
tuesdays...
i love not working until 8:30 on tuesday...it makes me feel like i have the day off...i wish i had something to talk about, but i don't! i mean, nothing is philisophically bothering me right now...let me play some spider solitaire to think about it.
god, isn't there something wrong with the world right now? i guess i just am not in a bitchy mood so i have nothing to argue about.
well i guess i should talk about why i am so happy. ummm, vacation in 2 weeks. i'm making a lot of money...
oh! i just got a good idea to talk about something...parents getting upset when their kids announce they are gay. god everything i talk about has to do with homosexuality it seems...well, tough luck.
ok so i'm talking to this andy boy and he's still in high school and he's telling me about a friend of his that has family problems. which makes me think: how much longer will these family problems exist? that is, how much longer will the whole idea of coming out exist? someone being "in the closet" implies that there is a problem with his homosexuality. and coming out implies the existence of a closet. therefore coming out implies a problem with homosexuality. and i will say it again. don't come out. i know i just did it at work a lil while ago, i just openly talked about how Wade from A&F was an assface to me because i was a homo.
and then alea was for sure talking about me in the back. i just know it. but she's cool, and it was something that was news to her i'm sure.
anyhow so what i really wanted to get at was how long it's going to take people to stop coming out of the closet, especially to parents. or how long with parents cry over their son or daughter being a homosexual? my guess: 50 years.
well, at least for a majority of parents not to care. ok perhaps i have more to write about this, but i'm going to go for a walk.
Posted by piep0058 at 12:24 PM | Comments (0)
June 21, 2004
the saddest thing i've ever seen
but so funny!
Posted by piep0058 at 01:40 AM | Comments (0)
June 20, 2004
am i sick or not?
ok -- i know last night i was getting ready to die. my tonsils were swelling like none other. but now they're normal again-- i think. and i'm covered in chocolate right now. nasty. i was so sick today while i was at caribou. i seemed pissy, but i wasn't. i was just kinda depressed. i don't really know why.
actually i think i do know why.
i get this thursday off! and i get paid this friday! yaaaaaaaaay! money money money! i'm such a hard worker.
countown to 21: 95 days. oh just looking at it makes me giggle. driving past comstock hall also makes me giggle.
well. i'm gonna bbq tonight, even if i'm all by myself. i don't really care. i like to grill burgers. so i guess i should get some supplies and such...
Posted by piep0058 at 07:57 PM | Comments (0)
June 19, 2004
a sigh of relief
it's party time, guess who has a place to live next year -- after months and months of waiting...ME!!! i'll be living in comstock hall next year. woo woo. i'm sure it'll be fun.
i'm so excited to start decorating my room! i want to get the coolest furniture. oh it'll be so fun! posters, vases, palm trees, wicker floor matts, the possibilities are endless!
but whatever. so i went to perkins today and that was good but i ate too much. and last night i bbq'd with brent so that was fun too. and then i got some hot sunglasses which really aren't sunglasses just like pieces of plastic that are made to seem trendy or something. i don't know.
and now i'm all nasty and smelly but i have to work in a few hours so i better take a shower. ew gross!
Posted by piep0058 at 02:52 PM | Comments (0)
June 18, 2004
watch out
so this dan boy thinks he can out wit me and go to #1 on the list of the blog with the most entries...that's what he thinks.
no one will have more entries than me. ever. or they will die.
ok i'm really not that psychotic about it all, but i don't know, it's just something to do in my free time.
Posted by piep0058 at 02:26 AM | Comments (1)
June 17, 2004
yay! i have toilet paper!
ok, now i know all of you don't want to hear this, but i wasn't able to poo in my own house for quite some time. oh my god how annoying. and you know my roommates are going to have diarreah and use it all up. those bastards. well i better hide like 10 rolls in my room for those emergencies. i got 24. that should last me the whole summer, shouldn't it?
and if i was getting sick, i think i am over it. my tonsils are going away (keeping fingers crossed) but i don't think i should smoke the hooka for a while.
we'll see how that goes. sigh.
soooo, i might just smoke that hooka anyway...BAD!
time for cartoons! yay!
Posted by piep0058 at 10:55 PM | Comments (3)
oh my god!
so i just worked a 12.5 hour shift at the loring pasta bar. and now i am completely drained. i even ate at annies parlour. (and ate way too much, oink oink) but i hadn't had anything to eat for the whole day!
so i'm in this hot debate wtih this one boy from the st. louis area about him wishing "he weren't gay." gosh why would anyone wish that? don't they get it? my life is so much more interesting, so much more diverse, i can see so much farther than anyone else i know, and it's all because of my queer position.
yeah, it sucks being different sometimes. people hate you. you can't be comfortable. you can't flaunt your sexuality without the straight people raising their eyebrows. and what is it about flaunting. "gay people are ok as long as they don't flaunt their sexuality" what the fuck is that supposed to mean?!?!?! straight people wouldn't think twice about sharing pictures of their boyfriend/girlfriend with other people. but the minute a gay man does it he's "flaunting his sexuality." it's one thing to go on about the stupid details about sex, but just to talk about people you're dating, come on, give me a break. that's not flaunting.
i grew up knowing i was different. and while it sucked sometimes, i never regretted it. i guess what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. and i know i've been through a lot of pain that i never needed to experience -- i mean, being outed in middle school was no fun at all. i had to grow up a lot faster than other kids should at that age. but being socially unacceptable at such a young age helped me realize just exactly how the nature of humans behaving towards diversity.
and it also made me see how much everyone else looks the same. the follow orders without even realizing it. i don't think i could ever handle living that life where i do what others have laid out before me. perhaps others can be satisfied. but the desire in my mind isn't what another person has created, as i see it is for so many others.
and that is why i have never regretted my queer position.
Posted by piep0058 at 12:00 AM | Comments (0)
June 16, 2004
enlightenment? or just more wool over the eyes?
ok so i started talking to this wierdo at the Kitty Cat Klub the other day. he was nice, educated. wasn't too radical. we talked about politics. supposedly the big petrochemical industries suppressed research for biomass fuel research back in the 40s and 50s. is this true? or just anti-oil propaganda of false lies.
note to self: cheap british petroleum station around 20th and university in northeast.
in other news, i got a "check" for 100 bucks from my credit card company. i don't know if it was a real check or not. i was scared to deposit it. oh well, whatever, but hey, i'm back to 4 digits in my TCF account, gosh i'm sooo rich. muahaha.
now it's time to take over the world.
and i'm the lucky bastard that gets to work at Loring for 12 hours straight tomorrow! yay!
Posted by piep0058 at 01:35 AM | Comments (16)
June 15, 2004
ruh roh! am i getting sick?
ok so i am coughin up a storm! perhaps i should not have smoked the hooka last night...hmmm oh well.
so working monday night at caribou rocked! i loved it, it was so not busy that i loved it! and i still made decent tips. but seriously, i can't deal with foreigners anymore. the are seriously starting to piss me off. well, not austrailians. but old eastern europeans and old english people are kinda annoying. and old french people suck too. but everyone else, please do not come in and try to communicate with me. because you can't. and even if you could, you don't know how we do things.
ok i'm done with that.
so i really want to go back to st. louis. it's been far too long.
ohhhh, let me talk about wade. i fucking hate wade. but wait, there's something more here...hahahahaha...i have a little secret.
ok, now wade is the manager at abercrombie who discriminated against me so long ago with nick (see previous entry...june 1st maybe?). and wade sure loves his depth charges. now, wade came in a while back...and he knows i'm a homo. he asks for decaf depth charges and i always give him regular. but that's beside the point. wade came in today, talking on his phone about how he banged some chick. the other night. now who says that out loud? a real jerk that's who. but it's odd that he would speak so loudly so i could hear him all the way over at the bar.
which makes me think. ok, why would he do that. did he want to prove that he was "straight" to me. what straight man does that? i could speculate that he felt "threatened" by me, and needed to communicate that he was "straight" to me so i would not hit on him (AND LIKE I WOULD! WADE IS A FUCKING UGLY DUMBASS THAT I WILL BEAT UP IF I SEE HIM IN SOME DARK ALLY...AND YOU KNOW IT'S GOING OT HAPPEN SOON! MARK MY WORDS!)
ahhhh, ok i needed to let that out. but it makes sense to me. i don't mean to imply that homophobes are actually homosexuals. but straight guys that feel they need to prove their straightness in front of homosexuals definitely have issues. i mean, when it is to answer someone's question that's fine...but wade did it in such a way that suggests fear. he does make a lot of eye contact with me...even for a "straight" man.
of course, i am only speculating. perhaps he really is some dumb jerk assface that goes around talking on the phone about girls he's banged.
Posted by piep0058 at 12:52 AM | Comments (0)
June 14, 2004
1st trip to wisconsin
allright so i decided to try some of that brown ale from new castel. sooo good! i'm so glad hillary got it for me.
and yeah, after smoking the hooka last night, i went with my roommate emmet and his friends from work to some denny's in wisconsin. boy as it classic. they're nice though. i'm glad i went, even though i nearly fell asleep (well i did in the car)
and i have to work tonight. sad! but i need money, i need money real bad.
Posted by piep0058 at 02:08 PM | Comments (0)
June 13, 2004
Something needs explaining
allright, now, supposedly at work i am lead to believe that someone quit because tony and i were mean to her. no one has called me mean for a very long time, in fact, i try my best to show the opposite, i try to be as accomodating as anyone.
however some people (i.e. kelly) just can't take the pressure or something (see previous comments). but yeah, kelly quit.
who knows why. i hope she isn't scared of me or something. because that would be sad. but let me get to the point i wanted to make a long time ago. is there something inborn about gay men that make them more stylish than other people (such as straight men) ? absolutely not. i know a lot of ugly, drug addict, gay men who are going no where with their lives.
so what is it then? well it all goes back to "loosening up" if you would call it that. part of being homosexual means throwing out society's pressure to control desire. most homosexuals might know more about desire (desire appeals to all the senses, it's not just someone's love for another). desire has been controlled for ages. people still refer to eating some really tasty dessert as being "sinful." that's just referring to taste and smell. desire can also be described as a rhythm. dance had originally been structured into such things like a waltz or something else where a man leads.
but then comes jazz, and out of jazz comes elvis. now, remember how elvis was censored? you know, nobody was allowed to see his hip thrusts because they were "sinful" but now it seems so tame that it's boring. no elvis was not gay. but he did know how to let loose of that control of desire. and what did he come up with? a new style of dance that has made it's way to every high school dance. but this has been capitalized on by choreographers. the letting loose of desire to form new art forms (as in dance) has stereotypically become a gay trade.
so has fine dining (as kelly pointed out initially) -- except this has to do with the desire of one's palate and the desire of ones eyes. the arrangement of food is not only appealing to taste and smell but also for the eyes. (i don't really need to tell you this, i know you already know). this too involves a sort of "letting loose" of that control of desire that so many others outside of the queer community have yet to shed.
thus, there are many homosexuals who defy the preconceived notions of desire and have found new styles that appeal to the senses in ways that the non-queer community could not create. queer heterosexuals are also capable of creating styles that appeal to the desire of the senses.
Posted by piep0058 at 12:21 AM | Comments (0)
June 12, 2004
it's so nice outside!
so i decided to take a bike ride today...oh my god it's so nice out, i love it. tonight will be great too, i can just feel it. so i'm on a mission now, to go to exotic restaurants. i mean, i work at one myself. and you can't get more exotic than the loring pasta bar, at least for minnesota standards. but i'm excited. so i've been to chino latinos, and i know quang is always good to go to, so that doesn't count...tonic, i think i'll pass on for now...how about bilimbi bay? and then there's the dessert bar right next door. or some other places in uptown/downtown/st. paul/grand ave? then there's azia and some other places down nicollet.
this one boy dan works at some restauarant i've never heard of out in eagan. i might check that one out, even though it's in eagan...
and then there's the concession stand at lake calhoun. that place makes me feel like i'm in florida or something. i don't know.
be prepared for an entry of some of my favorite places to eat.
i'll start off with quang. it's cheap. and it's REALLY GOOD LIKE HELLAH GOOD! enough said. it's just nice place for good vietnamese food. i'm so glad jon showed me it--i might not have ever gone there. but i kinda feel like going back right now!
and oh. harry potter was really good, go see it if you haven't, i'm sure you will be entertained (well at least i was). and i want to go see that silly "saved!" movie soon. maybe some late night brett? maybe on sunday someday? i don't know. we'll see when i don't have to work.
Posted by piep0058 at 02:34 PM | Comments (1)
birds are appearing
ahhhh, brent is so cool. needless to say, tonight was awesome. i hope he knows that. i hope i'm not giving mixed signals. because i know i am notorious for that. i just...i don't know...what is he looking for? this is the big debate...sigh...i'm not even looking for much--just someone to be close too. and i definitely was not going to kiss him in his cavalier with my stanky breath. oh well, i hope i'll see him soon. maybe we'll hang out on sunday night or on tuesday. whatever works.
too bad i have to work so much. le sigh.
hmmm time for a manicure, i never gave myself that one day i went to the park. and i'm going grocery shopping tomorrow too. then work. *yawn* i'm really tired, so i'm going to go to bed.
Posted by piep0058 at 02:28 AM | Comments (1)
June 10, 2004
Franz Ferdinand Rocks
ok so i never thought the archduke of the austro-hungrarian empire could play music so well. i mean he's been dead since 1914 when he was shot in Sarejevo. wow what a life, his assassination basically changed the whole 20th century. What if he had lived and WWI never occurred? Well germany might still have a kaiser (i'm sure it'd be much more ceremonial) and the whole german constitution would be different. and plus, the post-war inflation would not have occurred so Hitler probably would not have come to power, thus avoiding WWII. And without WWII the german mentality probably would not have been changed. Kids are taught nowadays to question teachers. It's important that someone like hitler never comes to power again -- no one questioned him. well a few did. but the point is that now everyone would question him. much opposite style for my dad. thus germans would still be that stereotypical war-mongering type i guess. who knows. but who knows, sometimes war is inevitable. the assassination of F.F. perhaps was just the spark people needed to go to war.
gosh am i tired! i stayed out way too late last night. coming up back at sunrise? tsk tsk...bad! and i have to work 2-9 at caribou today. that's in 2 hours. it'd be great if it were 3-10 or something...
Posted by piep0058 at 12:10 PM | Comments (11)
June 09, 2004
sitting by the lake at sunset
thus describes last night, sitting with brent. i gotta say, i didn't have much hope for brent, i mean, what's up with that...but now i see something happening. i don't know. i guess i dreamed of falling in love with a philosophical geek that was also really hot and was really smart and had written tons of books or discovered the cure for cancer and had an apartment in new york and london or something.
but brent is really hot and he's a great guy and so nice and we get along great and and and...i don't know, perhaps this feeling is coming over me. but i could be wrong. no rushing, of course. i mean, it's not like i was falling over cathal the first time i met him. i was really more interested in Matthew Shapiro. that was just first sight though. and cathal and i really got along well. but obviously someone doesn't care to e-mail me back. sad! but that's ok, i know he's still alive.
and it's not like i was not attracted to brent at first sight. he might be a homo, but he could even slip under my gaydar if i met him. and i have really good gaydar too. saying that he could slip past me without me detecting it actually means something big. perhaps that was it. i felt like i was sitting and eating with a straight guy. and we all know straight guys are not interested in me.
and i was kinda nervous as we were sitting there at loring. but last night sitting at lake calhoun was so chill. i didn't care about anything. and talking to him about stupid stuff was actually fun. there is still something in the back of my mind that tells me "he's too different from me" but i'll just put that aside for now. who knows, perhaps we might think the same. but i find myself laughing and smiling when he's not around. the same thing happened when i started dating cathal and mikey. wow that was a long time ago.
but brent is a boy scout and we all know how i feel about boy scouts... that one James Dale is kinda hot though, i guess.
Posted by piep0058 at 01:35 PM | Comments (0)
mmm, oatmeal and cherry jam
oh my god i'm so poor -- i wish i had a nice kitchen where i could actually get good groceries to put them in a nice place that is clean. but i don't, so oh well. so i'll be stuck eating oatmeal and peanut butter and jelly my whole life? oh well. it's good! and with a cup of tea it makes it all worth it.
and the bugs crawling over me at night...yeah, that's a problem...and oh my god i'm sunburnt! ooops!
another oops: i left my sunroof open while it was raining and i was shopping in uptown. but oh my god i got the sexiest clothes ever! but no more spending, i have spent like 200 dollars in the past few days, and that is much too much for me. i can't be like that. i need to save save save. paycheck this friday though!
Posted by piep0058 at 02:20 AM | Comments (0)
June 08, 2004
tired? not at all
gosh why can't i sleep, maybe i have a problem or maybe it's this fucking heat!!! god damnit!
Posted by piep0058 at 04:04 AM | Comments (1)
oh my god i'm melting
it's so hot right now. what am i going to do?
take a cold shower and go to bed, that's what.
Posted by piep0058 at 12:16 AM | Comments (1)
June 07, 2004
the day off!
yay i have monday off and i'm going to have a blast doing nothing but rollerlbading and laying in the sun and i don't know...i don't care.
picnics in parks are fun, i should do them more often. i am a lil red though...so i should monitor my sun exposure a little more.
ok so 90s was a bust so maybe saloon this thursday? i don't know we'll see. i'm going to go alone, as usual, in the hopes that i'll find someone i know there. but it's just so silly because i can't drink so i might just skip it.
oh my god my whole house just shook because a helicopter is flying too low. seriously, that was scary. the last time i went there i was with mike, so at least i had him to dance with. but now who do i have? hmm we'll see about that one.
god i just watched some straight porn and it was so distasteful. god it was so silly. seriously, no one gets pleasure off of doing that. (of course only i know what that is. and i'll keep it that way. sometimes gay porn is really distasteful too, such as with Jeff Stryker saying "oh yeah suck on that big cock, choke on that big cock" among other things.
i'm going to give myself a manicure/pedicure while at lake calhoun. if wolf Mike ever IMs me back that bastard. now i can be all pretty.
Posted by piep0058 at 02:38 PM | Comments (1)
so i'm bitchy now? part deux
ok so it's true, i just got back from the 90s and while it was fun to dance on the dance floor with brett i just have am soooo annoyed right now. why are people interested in me. i don't know. gay people are retarded.
i went out with brent tonight. i liked it, he is a good guy. i think he is what i have been looking for in a guy. he's nice, has a good heart. i must say i am very attracted to him at this moment. but are we compatible? well i would like to investigate it more. we're going out again. he just seems so cool about things. i might even start going to church with him sometime. who knows.
but he does seem kinda dorky...agriculture major? hmmm that's a rare one.
Posted by piep0058 at 03:22 AM | Comments (5)
June 06, 2004
so i'm btichy now? part 1
ok this topic is going to have multiple parts because i'm going to write deep.
part one: kelly at loring called me "bitchy" and do you really think i'm bitchy? i don't think so. but anyhow, it was in response to when she pointed out to me that bobinos is such a nice place to work, it's all so elegant, and it's gay-owned. gay owned? what? i had to ask her to repeat it. i wasn't upset, just curious as to why she would point it out. i mean, it's like that marked category i have talked about. everyone notices the gay owners or the female owners...but no one bothers to point out the straight white male owners. i want to convert her to realize how she is creating this category for people. in the perfect world no one would notice homosexuality as something that needs to be pointed out. and kelly is so cool too, i would love to hang out with her some more, and i wonder what her husband is like.
i hope she doesn't think i'm bitchy. because i'm not! i'm one of the nicest boys i know.
oh i'm going to spend some money tomorrow! yay! there's a shirt i wanna buy at sisley and i'm going to get some white jeans (or something?) to go with. yeah, white jeans would look good. but i need to get the steve madden shoes though, otherwise the whole outfit will just be crap.
and i have a date with brent! what fun!
Posted by piep0058 at 02:08 AM | Comments (0)
June 05, 2004
ooookay, no more booze
ok so maybe some wine, another day, but not tonight. and not for a while. i just drank the last of my heinekens that were in the fridge, and i am not going to have any more. ugh i'm just sick of getting drunk and feeling sick about it. but at least i got to bond with my icky straight roommates. i hope they don't think i'm a dork, not that i really care that much, but it'd be cool to be able to talk to them or whatever.
i also found out that we have a bench press thing and some other things in our basement. yay. this will be so easy for me to work out now. but oh well, no steam room to spy on other boys. not that i would really do that but steam rooms can be really sex i guess. when i'm rich i'm rich i'm going to put one in my house. but oh my god i'm not doing that with my family--yikes!
so still single and loving it.
and, i get to work at loring tonight. yay. i hope some nice homos stop in to see me. and if not, oh well. spending some time with clay that past few days has been awesome. clay is such a nice guy. too bad he has a boyfriend. but that's ok. soon enough i'll find someone cool. i know it's just a matter of time. sigh
here are the requirements that are subject to change and have some flexibility: 1-live in minneapolis area. 2-age, 19-25. 3-be yourself, be comfortable, be mentally sound (i know that's all relative, some would argue that i'm mentally challenged as well) 4-don't drink, smoke, whatever too much. 5-be going somewhere with your life, being a student counts, just be motivated to achieve something. 6-it helps if we can talk about philisophical ideas...meaning, we don't have to read books together but if you appreciate having a queer position as much as i do, i think we'll get along. 7-appreciate the arts. and i'm not just talking about fashion. 8-it helps if you know how to take care of yourself--like working out or something similar to stay active. perhaps there are more, but these are my current standards.
are these too much to ask?
Posted by piep0058 at 11:41 AM | Comments (0)
June 03, 2004
this will be a long day
ok so i got up at 4:45 a.m. today and oh my god i don't think i've ever been up so early in my life. well i have, actually, but it's been a long time. but this means i have a lot of time in the morning to basically do nothing. i'm goign to get a membership at the rec! but i'll do that tomorrow...no rush, no rush. i'l just do laundry and go to the bank. cuz i got money! yay!
hanging out with clay has been fun. true, he is a little odd with his medications, but we really seem to click. too bad he is coupled with andrew. but that's ok, soon enough...and if chris is around more often perhaps i will talk to him more. i hope he's down to earth and stuff...it's so sad when guys constantly try to impress the world. i mean, having a good image is one thing...but you can't worry too much about what others think. well at least i don't worry too much about what others think. well i do to a point. but i don't live by other's standards.
so...what to contemplate today...i have plenty of time before i have to drive all the way to the mall of america...seriously this place really is starting to scare me...
oh yeah, a few entries back i stated that interacting with large groups of people makes me uneasy. why is that? oh i should clarify. i mean at large parties. i don't have a problem with talking to people in large groups, but actually engaging in a conversation.
but the thing is, you don't say anything productive at these parties. i hate talking small stuff, and usually people are too dumb (especially while drinking beer) to really enhance my mind so i can learn something new or find a different point of view. and talking small stuff is ok if you are actually interested in sex with this person. but we all know the parties i go to, those nasty straight boy parties where all they want to do is to liquor up some not so attractive girl so she'll lift up her skirt. and even if i were at a party with a bunch of homos, i probably would not be interested in sex. and if i were to chat small talk with them i would probably think them to be stupid and i would move on. i mean, really, who fucking cares what happens to any professional sports team? you're not on the team are you?
i guess i should reiterate. it's not that i hate going to parties, it's just that it's so rare that i actually meet someone worth talking to more.
Posted by piep0058 at 09:50 AM | Comments (7)
June 02, 2004
once you're a chickmeister...
you're always a chickmeister, according to jason helm.
so there was this really cute boy that was in loring today--it'd be great if he were single and i would actually talk to him. but if not, oh well. his name is chris. so if anyone reading this knows him please tell him to talk to me more. he knows russian too! i wonder if he knows peter. i could get the hookup from alejandro yet again. oh but he is WAY too busy for me right now out having a fun time with Anders. i wonder if those 2 are going to get married. i think anders is too young. but if they give it time i think they will surely get married. or get into a big fight. who knows? does it matter? no.
the bottom line: i should actually come up with something interesting to say such as "i'm taking russian next year" because i am. please don't hit me on the head, Vit, i know Russia was very evil to Ukraine.
and i get the priviledge to wake up at 4:45 tomorrow morning to go to dinkytown to clean up. fun! at least there will be donuts there. that is good. and tony better not soak me with water too much...
so chris-boy. i'm imagining myself talking to you...when are you headed to russia again...need someone to keep you warm? oh god that was lame. but i crack myself up. oh what? you have a boyfriend (and you know he does!) oh well...i'll just be that 3rd wheel again.
Posted by piep0058 at 11:51 PM | Comments (0)
work work work
so now i am going to complain about working too much. this was my choice however, but this is my blog, so i am going to bitch as much as i want. perhapt it's not that bad however. i am just dramatic because i do not have anyone to date. i don't know, maybe if i had someone to share feelings with i wouldn't write so much in my online journal. i swear you'd think i'm dating this thing.
but it's just working at the loring pasta bar. nothing too difficult. and i like making fun of customers. it's the highlight of my day! and oh, i don't have a bed anymore, so i will sleep on the floor. oh fucking well. that's fine with me, i don't mind.
so supposedly i'd be a great guy to date...who knew. then why am i not going on any? actually the date with dan was fun. but a dead end. oh well. moving on.
the movie troy sucked ass, just as i thought. but i had to go see it just to be sure it was as bad as i thought. oh well.
oh, and while i'm on, before i go to work, let me say this: tops are silly and they need to get over it. and everyone is just like me and has the same exact desires of course. but no joke, this is all constructions. men who believe they make a better top or bottom are silly. (except ones with colon cancer, they're ok) i don't know why i put up with it before, BUT I REFUSE TO PUT UP WITH IT EVER AGAIN. i don't care if i don't have any friends. because i don't already so it's not like i'm going to get any.
Posted by piep0058 at 04:05 PM | Comments (4)
June 01, 2004
will it stop raining...PLEASE
ok so it's really wet outside, hence, i can't rollerblade. sad! but that's ok. soon the monsoons will stop.
ok so now let me talk about Abercrombie and Fitch. now, they are not evil like the mcdonalds corporation is, because mcdonalds will actually kill you. however, they are not exactly the greatest company in the world. their style is soooo, faux exclusive. and it's not even original. these styles are just adapted and brought to the midwest, but they originated from designers such as Dolce & Gabbanna, Armani, Gucci, etc. however whereas they abandoned the vintage homeless look a long time ago, A&F found a market for it out in the good ol' midwest.
A&F emergence and popularity goes hand and hand with the emergence of homosexual visibility in the late 1990s. men have traditionally not been the objects desire ever since...ever since. and now things are changing, and A&F was able to capitalize on a whole new market: the suppressed homosexuality of young boys.
you can't deny that in some light, the pictures on the walls in abercrombie are like gay porn. scantily clad men, doing sports, and even the real models the come during the holidays. gay porn? i think so. if you just remove a little bit of clothes you basically have A&F video productions. however, the marketing executives have disguised this in a very clever way: by ignoring any aspect of same sex desire at all. they refuse to advertise in gay magazines. (this reason of course, being as homosexuality has been stigmatized.)
people always joke about the GAP being "gay and proud" -- but it seems A&F is much more homoerotic. they just refuse to acknowledge publicly any aspect of this same sex desire i am going on about. in fact, i feel i should bring this up: one time when i was talking to nick he was publicly told "not to make eye contact with me" because i would try to hit on him or something. i don't know, perhaps that makes me a little upset. but in the end, it doesn't matter. i still wear abercrombie because i know it's what these other mindless drones find attractive.
so i conform to this anti-homosexual agenda, and this whole essay has been in vain. well, no, not really. at least i see it happening, isn't that good enough? refusing the wear the clothes, i would be like Ike McCaslin giving up the land in "go down moses" (william faulkner). i mean, sure i know it's wrong, but do i have to alienate myself -- wouldn't it be better to protect other people by working with the current web of discourse. (not like they really need protecting, i was just out of words to use, perhpas "enlightening them" is better.)
and to anyone who disagrees that Ike McCaslin should have kept that land -- we need to have a talk.
Posted by piep0058 at 01:27 PM | Comments (4)