mama said life would be this hard...
so i've been too busy to blog and had to find a new apartment. the rain needs to stay outside and off of my favorite things. been too sick, coughing up lung chunks and shit. figured out my illnesses began when i moved in this place. so i found a spot and i'm moving out dec 1. can't wait.
so i've been feeling american disgust. this photograph from cnn shows a bit how i'm feeling.

sad, tears, post-flood drops, reflecting and refracting the stories and images. my comfort, privilege, and access to resources at the hands to so many people's absolutely disgusting behavior and values. and i still can't believe how we have all failed the NO. my baby still has gotten no word from his baby, joseph. he wrote a beautiful poem about it - we're drowining. as soon as it's "finished" ill post it here (maybe as an audio clip of love love).
rosa got locked up for recording and distributing the truth. gotta love my girl. i still got to get on the hip hop mamas flick, starrring mi hermana rosa, por supuesto!
been talking about getting married. i'm already a johnson, granny listed me in "the" book under j, but i'm terrified of that institution. wedding ring the resymbolization of the noose. Marriage was a transfer of property. Husbands would noose their wives and lead them through town to show off their property. A noose isn't the most convenient and over the years it transformed into a ring (some cut from thimbles). "...bands signified a binding legal agreement of ownership by their husbands, who regarded rings as tokens of purchase." Read on, and on - "In early Egypt, the ring was linked with the supernatural, a never-ending band linked with eternal love. For the Romans later, the ring's acceptance by a young lady was a binding, legal agreement and the girl was no longer free. Today we accept the ring as part of a religious ceremony when we marry in church." I rarely "accept" anything as just part of the deal. I'll keep you posted.
i just loved this photo on cnn off beat images today. want to feel like this. young, free, colorful...

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