FamiLee Life

Separated at Birth and by an Ocean

In the United States, it was common practice in the mid to late 20th century to separate twins at birth and have them adopted into separate families. You still occasionally hear about twins separated at birth who later come into contact with each other by chance or, as some suggest, by a sort of genetically-driven familiarity. These unique circumstances became a type of natural experiment to study the interplay of genetics and environment. Actually, the Dept of Psychology at the University of Minnesota (where I work) has become quite famous for conducting groundbreaking research on the role of genetics in twins (click here).

A few years ago, while attending an international conference on Korean adoption in Denmark, I learned about a set of Korean triplets where two were adopted internationally to Denmark and the third remained with the birthfamily. The adopted siblings thought they were twins and knew nothing about their sibling until they were in their 20s or so (and vice-versa for the triplet in Korea). It's an unusual story but not unheard of. It also added to the complexities of negotiating what it means to be adopted and to be Korean.

Now comes a Star Tribune story about a local Korean American woman who was adopted from South Korea by a Minnesota family and has learned at 21 years old that she is a twin and her sister still lives in South Korea.

As I continue my research on adopted Korean children and adults, I have heard of other such cases among Korean adoptees. It's a question that floats through the minds of many as they begin to search their family histories. Let's hope this story brings some answers for all involved.

Merry Christmas

I could not help it. Found this image on Velo Orange and lifted it. I suspect he lifted it as well from here given the two words in the image.

Classic Rock Lovefest with Heartbreaker (plus Toto, Santana)

On Saturday night, HW and I went down to some country club in Hastings because her brother Jim's band Heartbreaker had a holiday gig there. I had never seen Jim perform (he's the lead guitarist), so I was excited. Boy, let me tell you that they did not disappoint. Classic rock heaven. It was an amazing performance that night because the former lead singers for Toto and Santana were guest vocalists! No joke. Fergie Frederiksen fronted Toto for a couple of years and Alex Ligertwood has been the lead singer for Santana on and off for over 18 years. I guess these two singers are best of friends (or so it was said on stage) and have performed together as part of the -- get this -- World Classic Rockers! Okay, enough of them. Let me conclude by saying Jim is an amazing guitarist. He nailed the guitar solos on every song, even the ever difficult Santana licks. It was pretty sweet to watch. We were all proud of him that night. What a perfect prelude to Christmas. An early gift. Wouldn't it be great if they performed at our wedding?! Hint, hint.... oh, and don't worry, there will still be karaoke.

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!!!

Word of the Day

SWELL. As in, I feel swell.

I am starting a mini-movement to bring this word back into fashion. I know, it might bring some of you back to those Happy Days (a la Richie Cunningham), but who cares. It's a wonderful word, isn't it?

Swell is also an oceanic term and used in bookbinding.

SWELL
Pronunciation:
\ˈswel\
Function:
verb
Inflected Form(s):
swelled; swelled or swol·len Listen to the pronunciation of swollen \ˈswō-lən\; swell·ing
Etymology:
Middle English, from Old English swellan; akin to Old High German swellan to swell
Date:
before 12th century

intransitive verb
1 a: to expand (as in size, volume, or numbers) gradually beyond a normal or original limit b: to become distended or puffed up c: to form a bulge or rounded elevation
2 a: to become filled with pride and arrogance b: to behave or speak in a pompous, blustering, or self-important manner c: to play the swell
3: to become distended with emotion

transitive verb
1: to affect with a powerful or expansive emotion
2: to increase the size, number, or intensity of

Beautiful Day and I Overslept

I think the semester finally caught up with me last night/this morning. I overslept by an hour and had to carpool to work today. Of course, it looks like today is the most beautiful of days and I wished I had ridden. But I had a morning appointment and would never had made it, if I rode my bike. Alas. Fortunately, there is tomorrow which will be the nadir of dark days. Plus, it's a nice perk to carpool with HW and not have to personally worry about traffic.

Small Updates on Things

1) It's already dark outside. Ugh. On the bright side, days get longer after Friday (or whatever the exact date for the winter solstice).

2) The pest control guy came to the home today and thinks we have mice in the house. Then, he was doubtful because we could find no mice droppings. Possibly chipmunks (argh!), but unlikely squirrels (phew) or bats (phew). Threw down some poison to solve the problem. Fingers crossed and hopefully no dead mice or chipmunks or whatever in the middle of the living room or elsewhere.

3) Journey (the band) has signed on Arnel Pineda from the Phillipines as their new lead singer (replacing Steve Perry who has left the band or is holding out for some reason). Apparently, they discovered the singer on YouTube!

4) I rode my bike, SS Amnesty, yesterday and today. Ah, felt good to be back on the road with two-wheels. Was a bit scary riding through downtown rush hour traffic. I think I need to invest in some ski goggles because my glasses keep fogging up.

A Birthmother's Story from Guatemala

Adoption critics and adopted individuals advocating for the rights of birthmothers often complain about the lack of media attention toward the lives of birthmothers whose children are adopted internationally. This lack of media coverage seems particularly acute in the United States where the spotlight is on adoptive parents. A good example is the current NYTimes blog Relative Choices which has been criticized by adoptee/adoptive parent bloggers (and Mother Jones) for its biased coverage of adoption, the censoring of posted comments by critics, and the editing by an adoptive parent journalist who has not been transparent in his editorial decisions.

So, we turn to the BBS for a very fascinating story of a Guatemalan young woman who is a mother and almost lost her child to coercive adoption methods. Click here for the full story. Below are a few snippets from the personal story.

Then my aunt found an ad in the paper that offered help to pregnant teenagers.

The lawyer gave me two options. She said I had to give my baby up, or my boyfriend.

2007 International Adoption Trends

I found this graph in a recent BBC story on changes in Guatemala adoption. I am posting it here because I could not find it on the US Dept of State website on immigrant visas issues to orphans which only lists data through 2006. In the graph, in addition to the high number of adoptions from Guatemala this year, you can see a rise in the number of adoptions from Vietnam. This rise is associated with recent cooperation between Vietnam and US officials to smooth out irregularities in adoption patterns which previously halted adoption from Vietnam. However, the US Dept of State just issued another warning about irregularities in adoption from Vietnam. There also appears to be a significant drop in the total number of international adoptions from South Korea, China, and Russia to the United States and a concurrent rise in the number of adoptions from Ethiopia and Ukraine.

The Terror of Karaoke

From the AP wire comes a story about a group of teenagers singing "Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns-n-Roses into the school PA system and a teacher thinking it's a death threat against her.

A school custodian's impromptu after-hours karaoke performance prompted a police response when a teacher thought she was being threatened over the loudspeaker.

Police say one of them sang "Welcome to the Jungle" into the microphone. The song contains the lyrics "You're in the jungle baby; you're gonna die."

Human Sex Trafficking in Minnesota

A major police/FBI sting operation occurred with the arrest and shutdown of a major human sex trafficking case involving primarily Korean and Chinese women. Read full story here. This is not necessarily new news, as it's been known for some time among local/state officials and human rights organizations (see earlier story here). You can read a report to the Minnesota Legislature on Human Trafficking here. The St Paul-based Civil Society has been working on this issue for a while now too.

On Language: Academic Arrogance

From the University of Minnesota Language Proficiency Requirements for Nonnative English Speaking Teaching Assistants:

Policy Statement
All nonnative English speaking Teaching Assistants (TAs) must demonstrate proficiency in spoken English appropriate to the demands of their teaching assistantship.

Definitions
Nonnative speaker of English. Person for whom the primary language in the home during childhood was not English. Country of citizenship and language of elementary, secondary or undergraduate education are NOT factors in this definition.

Hm.... let's do a thought experiment. If you immigrated to the United States from South Korea as a 4 year old child and subsequently was educated wholly in the United States but spoke Korean with your parents growing up, then you are (by definition) considered a nonnative speaker of English and thus ineligible to serve as a teaching assistant at the University of Minnesota until you pass a language proficiency exam. If you are a child of an immigrant family from France and you were born raised in the United States speaking primarily French in the home as a child, then you are (by definition) considered a nonnative speaker of English and thus ineligible to serve as a teaching assistant at the University of Minnesota until you pass a language proficiency exam.

I actually had a situation in which a graduate student's language proficiency was questioned prior to his/her appointment as a teaching instructor because this student's name was non-English (i.e., it was not John or Mary). As I researched what defines language proficiency, I came across this ridiculous university requirement.

I have attempted in the past to have this point addressed but to no avail. I plan to raise the issue again.

Another Bicycle Tragedy

I have been itching to ride again now that the snow has ceased and the roads have cleared. I promised myself and HW that I would ride only when it was safe outside and not unreasonably cold (less than 20 F degrees). So the plan is to go for a bike ride tonight to hang out with the boys. Then, I read this story in the Star Tribune. Ugh. What a horrible tragedy.

Edward Joseph Gorecki, 51, was on his bicycle about 9:30 p.m. at the intersection of NE. Quincy and Broadway streets in Minneapolis when he was hit by a vehicle driven by a 41-year-old woman....According to police, she dragged Gorecki's bicycle for 1½ blocks, then hit another car at Broadway and NE. 2nd Street. Finally, officers were able to stop the woman over a mile away at 18th and Fremont Avs. N. Officers cited her for drunken driving. Her blood-alcohol content was .10.

I have ridden in this area many times and often at night. Boy, it makes you think twice. Still, I am undeterred in bicycling. I realize most drivers are not drunk and most are not negligent in their driving habits. It warrants caution when cycling though and I shall proceed with plenty of caution. Be safe, folks.

MJ Cuts Better Than Me

No, I am not referring to Michael Jordan. No, not Michael Jackson either. I am talking about the progressive magazine Mother Jones. And the cutting? I was going to write about my (seemingly) increasing tendency to accidentally cut myself with my uber-sharp knives while preparing meals. Case in point, I cut my finger last night preparing Alaskan King Crab - yum. It was a minor knick but still hurts and makes typing a bit of a challenge.

So Mother Jones was cutting into what then? Well, there is an insightful and critical article by Elizabeth Larsen on the one-sided portrayal of adoption in the media. Larsen has written before on adoption (see Did I steal My Daughter? The Tribulations on Global Adoption). In this new article titled International Adoption, It's a One-Way Dialogue she addresses the way the editor of the New York Times' special blog series titled Relative Choices (which is about adoption) has been censoring comments posted by adopted adults and allies who are expressing a critical alternative perspective on the subject matter. It's an important read and I encourage people to examine the issues and meta-issues at play.

Adoption like all human subject matters is a diverse experience with good and bad intermixing, no right and wrongs, lots of ambiguity, trust and risk, joys and heartaches, mistakes and successes. It's a shame to all parties involved when we can't tolerate the complexity of life long enough to appreciate the knowledge gained from it and to change our ways to be better people.

I Heart Family Guy

Ok, I am many years behind the curve on this one. I recently discovered the hilarity of Family Guy. I am not sure how I missed it when it initially premiered about 8 years ago (in 1999), but I am glad I finally caught on. There are so many times watching the episodes when I just laugh out loud, bellowing, truth be told. It's good therapy.

Well, not much else to say on this one except be sure to catch some of the reruns or new episodes on Sundays at 8 pm.

Two+ Years of Peace GONE!

I began this blog at a time when my life was topsy turvy crazy with an infestation of rodents of all kinds -- namely squirrels, bats, and chipmunks. After spending hundreds of dollars on pest control and many hours of labor to evict them all, it seems they have returned. The "they" is still undetermined but my now well-trained ears tell me it is squirrels.

Now some people love squirrels. In fact, there is a squirrel website dedicated to them. But to me, they are simply a destructive critter whose late afternoon and nighttime noises drive me absolutely crazy. HW has yet to fully experience their terror, but I am sure she will find it equally maddening.

So, stayed tuned as the saga continues....and the trapping begins.

Three More Words (+1 More)

BOWIE ROCK BLOCK + SLEDDING!

Snow Makes Me Sleepy

The weather forecasters called this one correctly. It started to snow early this morning and has steadily continued throughout the day. I think it's snowed about 4 inches thus far and it could accumulate between 6-10 inches by the time it stops. I forgot where I stored the snow shovel, but found it in the garage. Having shoveled twice and having watched BC lose to VT in the 4th quarter, I decided to do the next best thing. Sleep. Here is a photo of Shiloh (aka, the cat blanket) and me. Ah...the weekend.