May 20, 2009

Ballpark tour

Today, thanks to the generosity of Dan Kenney (Executive Director of the Ballpark Authority), I was able to partake in a tour of Target Field, the future home the Minnesota Twins. This tour was a really special moment for me. I'm not going to lie, I was overwhelmed at a couple of points in the tour just looking out over the ballpark and seeing a whole bunch of hard work come to fruition. It will be a beautiful place to watch a ballgame, no doubt about it.

Along with Freealonzo, Cheesehead Craig, Jeff Thompson, Ryan Maus, and Rick Prescott we started our tour around 4:45. We didn't finish until around 6:15. So, we saw a fair amount of the ballpark. Needless to say, I could have stayed longer. Here are a few impressions. Before I begin, though, I am not a ballpark design expert. I don't know the lingo, and I'll probably get a few of the details wrong. Rick will blow this description out of the water, which is OK. This is just another viewpoint:

• The ballpark is so compact! You hear that over and over again, but looking out over the field right behind home plate really drives this fact home. It is a very small site, and seats are placed and stacked in every nook and cranny that can hold them. And unlike the new Yankees stadium, every seat can see the action.
• The view behind home plate is absolutely stunning. Actually most of the view on the lower level takes your breath away. If your seat is down there you will be right on top of the action. Also, the seats directly behind home plate extend a little past the dugouts so those lucky fans will be able to see what is going on within the dugouts too.
• The bullpen sections for both teams are tiny. Not a big surprise, but they really crammed them into the left field wall. The opposing team's bullpen should be closest to the fans so hurling insults down at them should be fairly easy. Although Rick said Joe Nathan gets to decide where the Twins bullpen will be located. I would pick closest to the field, but that is just me.
• There will be many, many different ways to get food and drinks. Four distinct areas that impressed me were devoted to honoring the past. There is the Puckett atrium that will feature a huge wooden mural of the man and overlook the southwest through ceiling to floor windows. Of course, it will include a bar. Next there will be the Carew atrium that is a little bigger than Puckett's, but has the unfortunate distinction of overlooking the garbage burner. Dan said that they have already worked with the county to make sure that garbage trucks enter the facility on the west side of the HERC so as not to disgust fans in the Carew atrium. Probably a good idea. There will also be a huge wooden mural of Carew on one of the walls. Next there will be a club called the "573 Club" obviously honoring Harmon Killebrew and his 573 career home runs. Dan said that they have purchased the bat which the Killer used to hit number 573 and it will feature prominently. The bar in this area will also be made out of a huge, partly unfinished Ash tree log which will be a nice touch considering how baseball bats were made in the past. Finally, there will be a "Metropolitan Club" for season ticket holders to congregate in away from all the poor saps that only bought single game tickets. The Metropolitan Club will feature many design elements that hearken back to the old Met, including some of the same garish colors used in that old ballpark. Dan joked that one of the bathrooms in that area has already been painted purple and gold which must unwittingly torture Lester Bagley (Do you get it? Lester is the front man for the Vikings stadium effort, and a bathroom in Target Field has been painted purple and gold? Get it? No? Let's move on ...). And on top of these four areas there will be even more clubs and restaurants, concession stands, and nifty areas to consider and muse about how lucky we are to have a new Twins ballpark.
• We toured the top of the Target Plaza and got a real sense on how close non-ticket buying fans will get to the action. Close, but not close enough. Target Plaza will be a public area though so people will be able to mill around there without a ticket to their hearts' content.
• We also ventured up to the Terrace level of the ballpark. Climbing up to the Terrace level took a while as we walked up on the ramps that scale the south side of the field. These ramps are thin. There is no doubt that they will be jam packed with fans and be very crowded before and after games. One of the only negatives I saw to being on such a cramped site.
• Overlooking the field on the Terrace level was a little different than behind home plate. You are up high, much higher than I would have thought and again the bird's eye view of the field is stunning. Dan even said seats on this level on the 3rd base line may be some of the best seats in the park. The view of the skyline is even better than advertised, and if you get far enough down towards left field you will be able to get the Wells Fargo building into view. During sunset and at night the view of downtown Minneapolis will be well worth the price of admission.
• It has been said before, but I'll say it again, the scoreboard is huge! Absolutely monstrous. I'm almost of the opinion that it will distract the players as they bat. When the opposing team is up they should put a picture of Jessica Biel in a bikini on the scoreboard. That would probably quantify into at least 20 Twins victories right there.
• Finally, we got to see Dan Kenney's new office. Usually that wouldn't be something I would highlight, but Dan's office will be the farthest "suite space" down the 1st base line, and his office overlooks the field. Can you imagine? Can you imagine having a job where your office could overlook such a magnificent site? Where you could be at work and actually watch the game? Rick already asked if he could have a job as Dan's pencil sharpener, so I'd like to throw my hat in for the job of pencil arranger. Rick can sharpen them and I'll arrange them on Dan's desk. Sound good Dan? Man! What a view.

As you can probably tell, I don't have any pictures to help illustrate what I am describing above. This is definitely a bummer. The Twins want to heavily control how information is released concerning their new palace. I must admit I don't understand this thinking, especially considering how many pictures of TCF Bank Stadium are out there. Maybe they will loosen this restriction once the ballpark gets closer to completion, or is complete (Dan said maybe sometime in December). We can only hope. I mean, it will help sell tickets for people to see this beautiful place inside and out, don't you think?

Anyway, I'd like to thank Dan Kenney for his gracious offer of a tour. Dan, from the bottom of my heart thank you for letting me see this place. It was awesome. Maybe on the next tour we can see the Twins clubhouse, dugout, and locker room? Also, thanks to Freealonzo, Jeff Thompson, Cheesehead Craig, Ryan Maus, and Rick Prescott for being great tour mates. All of your great questions and observations made the tour that much more enjoyable. And nice to finally meet you Rick! Nice work on that site you got there!

So, that is my description of touring Target Field. I started working on getting that crazy ballpark built in 2003. To actually set foot inside of it, to see it in a tangible fashion and be able to truly visualize how much fun it will be to watch a game being played there ... wow. It was very gratifying and overwhelming. I could have sat and looked out over the field all night long.

2010 can't come quick enough! Thanks again Dan! Let's do that again some time!

PS -- Kevin! Yes! I have my season tickets to TCF Bank stadium already purchased. I will be in section 215. Let's try to meet up!

UPDATE -- Freealonzo has some thoughts up as does Jeff Thompson. Be sure to check those out, too!

Posted by Shane at 10:45 PM | Comments (12)

February 4, 2009

The Whammer and three pitches

This is the winter of our discontent. Quite frankly I am sick of the cold, sick of the bleak landscape, sick of huddling in my house to escape the wind and the chill. I would be surprised if you didn't feel the same way.

So, I've decided to read a book about baseball. What better way to think about summer and warmer times than to read about baseball? And not just any book about baseball, thanks to a suggestion from Freealonzo, I am reading The Natural by Bernard Malamud.

Originally published in 1952, the The Natural is a relatively short book that would later be turned into a movie of the same name starring Robert Redford. Again, I'd be surprised if you haven't seen it.

Do you remember the scene in the beginning of the movie where the young Roy Hobbs strikes out the Ruthian character of the Whammer? Here is how the author describes the three pitches of that epic duel:

"Roy stretched loosely, rocked back on his left leg, twirling the right a little like a dancer, then strode forward and threw with such force his knuckles all but scraped the ground on the follow-through.

A thirty-three the Whammer still enjoyed exceptional eye-sight. He saw the ball spin off Roy's fingertips and it reminded him of a white pigeon he had kept as a boy, that he would send into flight by flipping it into the air. The ball flew at him and he was conscious of its bird-form and white flapping wings, until it suddenly disappeared from view. He heard a noise like the bang of a firecracker at his feet and Sam had the ball in his mitt. Unable to believe his ears he heard Mercy intone a reluctant strike."

Beautiful, no? Very descriptive and it allows the reader to imagine and visualize with great detail what this pitch looked like to the Whammer. Here is the second pitch:

"Roy pumped, reared and flung.

The ball appeared to the batter to be a slow spinning planet looming toward the earth. For a long light-year he waited for this globe to whirl into the orbit of his swing so he could bust it to smithereens that would settle with dust and dead leaves into some distant cosmos. At last the unseeing eye, maybe a fortuneteller's lit crystal ball -- anyway, a curious combination of circles -- drifted within range of his weapon, or so he thought, because he lunged at it ferociously, twisting round like a top. He landed on both knees as the world floated by over his head and hit with a whup into the cave of Sam's glove."

The Whammer's determination to really crush the ball comes out in this passage. I must admit I feel this way every time I go to hit a golf ball. Now the third pitch:

"The third ball slithered at the batter like a meteor, the flame swallowing itself. He lifted his club to crush it into a universe of sparks but the heavy wood dragged, and though he willed to destroy the sound, he heard a gong bong and realized with sadness that the ball he had expected to hit had long since been part of the past; and though Max could not cough the fatal word out of his throat, the Whammer understood he was, in the truest sense of it, out."

In this passage, the Whammer again wants to crush the ball but his confidence is gone, and he is almost resigned to his fate of whiffing again.

Planets and meteors and pigeons. Some interesting ways to describe three pitches. Reading this yesterday ... it almost felt like it was summer.

Posted by Shane at 8:34 AM | Comments (8)

December 15, 2008

Books Read 2008

Here are the books I read in 2008. Most of them were pretty good. In fact, I usually stop reading a book if about half way through I don't like it, so most of these mini-reviews will be positive. If you read any good books this year, please let me know! I'm always looking for a good book to read.

As always, every one of these books was checked out from a library. And for those of you that are interested:

Books Read 2007
Books Read 2006
Books Read 2005

1. Plainsong by Kent Haruf

I find that I enjoy fiction more than non-fiction and this is by far the best fiction book I read this year. Plainsong tells the story of a year in the life of many different characters in Holt, Colorado, but none of them are as interesting as the life of Victoria Roubideaux. Victoria is a pregnant 17 year old who gets kicked out of her house and decides to live with two older, single brothers on their cattle farm on the outskirts of town. You might think, "Wow, does that sound boring," but you'd be wrong. It is actually quite beautiful. I can't recommend it highly enough.

2. Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follet

Again, you would think a book about building cathedrals in medieval England would be as boring as watching paint dry, but it is not. As is always the case in good books, the stories of the main characters are riveting. Tom Builder is a master craftsman moving from town to town begging for work to support his family. He has a dream, however, to one day build a cathedral. Prior Philip is caught in the middle of a war of succession for England's throne and the church is caught up in this political reality. These two lives, plus many others, are brought together in a book that is at times quite difficult to put down.

3. Eventide by Kent Haruf

The sequel to Plainsong goes back to the town of Holt, Colorado to pick up where we left off concerning the lives of Victoria and the McPheron brothers. New characters are brought into the mix, including a young 11 year old boy named DJ who takes care of his elderly grandfather and tries to find some comfort in the friendship of two neighbor girls whose father has abandoned them. It is at once heartbreaking and beautiful. Taken together, Plainsong and Eventide make for a wonderful story on the resiliency of the human spirit and how the people around us make a huge difference on our lives.

4. The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss

I usually don't like fantasy novels much. Most of the time they are too similar and too reliant on magic and sorcery to drive the story. The is especially true of the Sword of Truth series. Egads is that ever bad. But The Name of the Wind is really, really good. It tells the story of Kvothe, a boy that is orphaned when the Chandrian, a legendary evil, kills his family. He takes to the streets and scrambles to make a living before he decides to go to the University to firstly learn the higher magic of "naming" but also to learn more about the Chandrian. This is the first book in what will be a trilogy and I really can't wait for the next one to come out in April.

5. So Brave, Young, and Handsome by Leif Enger

A worthy second effort from the author of Peace Like a River, this book tells the story of struggling Minnesotan writer named Monte Becket. Through some strange circumstances Becket decides to travel with Glendon Hale, an outlaw that is trying to right a wrong from years past. It is a story of redemption that I found a little unsatisfactory at the end (especially in comparison to Peace Like a River) but still very much worth the read. Especially if you like a good "Western" type story.

6. Outliers by Malcom Gladwell

This was a fascinating and quick read with a pretty interesting thesis: Successful people are given fantastic opportunities, are probably born at the "right time," and are able to rise above cultural legacies to reach that goal of success. Sure, hard work factors into the equation, but over and over again Gladwell demonstrates that most of the time successful people were just in the right place at the right time and they were smart enough (or even forced to) grab hold of the opportunity. For example, why are most successful hockey players born in either January, February, or March? Read this book to find out.

7. The Lost Fleet: Courageous by Jack Campbell

Ah, back to story of Black Jack Geary and his efforts to bring the Alliance fleet home after a failed battle in the Syndics home territory. Fantastic military science fiction and much to my happiness this book starts to bring in the idea that their are aliens pulling the strings in this never ending war. I love a good alien story. I don't know how many books will be in this series, but I am certainly enjoying it.

8. Rollback by Robert J. Sawyer

Speaking of aliens, Rollback tells the story of astronomer Sarah Halifax, the only person on earth able to decipher an alien message, and maybe the only person able to decipher the next alien message received 38 years later when she is 87 years old. By this time there are medical treatments available that can make people young again, and she and her husband decide to go through with the process. Unfortunately, the rollback treatment only works on him. I don't know how Robert Sawyer does it, but he is incapable of writing a bad book. I am riveted by every one of his books, and this one is no exception. Besides the story of the aliens and what they actually want from us, there is a philosophical side to this story discussing the troublesome idea of becoming young again. Would you do it? Interesting to think about.

9. The Glory of Their Times by Lawrence S. Ritter

Originally published in the early 1960s, this is a collection of oral histories gathered by Ritter with an old tape recorder as he traveled the country looking for elderly baseball players. Most of these ballplayers played in the first two decades of the 20th century when the game was relatively young. The game and life they describe is fascinating, but perhaps even more remarkable is how constant the game has stayed over the years. If you are a baseball fan this is a must read.

10. Moneyball by Michael Lewis

A detailed look at how the Oakland A's baseball club stay so competitive from year to year. Lewis and A's GM Billy Beane give a lot of credit to carefully gathered baseball statisics, with perhaps none being as important as on-base percentage. In other words, Beane tries to select players who get on base more, be it walks or hits. That is just one of the many baseball statistics discussed in this book, and it is hard to argue with Beane's success, especially considering his tight budget. I would have liked this book more, though, if the author hadn't been so flippant regarding the Twins' success.

UPDATE: There is a better review and description of this book from Freealonzo in the comments of this entry. Thanks Free!

11. Breaker Boys by David Fleming

The story of the early National Football League is really quite fascinating, especially told from the viewpoint of the small towns that had teams in the early days of the league. This is the story of the Potsville Maroons, a team from Potsville, PA in the heart of coal country. It would be unfathomable that a town as small as Potsville would have a team today, but in 1925 they were the best team in the league. And if they hadn't played the "Notre Dame All-Stars" against the wishes of the NFL, they would still be considered the 1925 league champions. Instead, that honor was given to the Chicago Cardinals, a team the Maroons beat, and some say the curse of this ill-gained championship is still haunting the Cardinals today.

12. The Lost Fleet: Valiant by Jack Campbell

Again, the story of Black Jack Geary bringing the Alliance fleet home is great, read-it-in-an-afternoon military sci-fi, but in this book the character of Madame Co-President Victoria Rione really started to get on my nerves. I'm sure you would agree.

13. The Meaning of Sports by Michael Mandelbaum

Why do Americans watch baseball, football, and basketball? Why are we so riveted by these contests? This book seeks to answer that question from a sociological perspective as it tells the history of each of these sports and how they sprung up from the societies that existed at the time of their creation. Baseball, the agrarian, outdoor sport with no time limit; football, the industrial sport ruled by the coaches and featuring specialized jobs; and basketball, the fast moving, post-industrial sport of individuals that make up a team. A relatively quick read, I must say that at the end I still didn't quite get the author's main thesis. But as a quick history of the three most popular sports in America it was well worth it.

14. 1632 by Eric Flint

What would happen if you took a small town in West Virginia and plopped it in the middle of 17th Century Germany? Well, apparently you would have a group of coal miners trying to bring the principles of the American Revolution to this feudalistic and war-torn era. Throw Sweden's Gustavus Adolphus into the mix and you've got a story that is interesting most of the time, and confusing the rest.

15. Starship: Mutiny by Mike Resnick

You know, I can tell that Mike Resnick is a pretty smart cookie, but I couldn't help but think that this book was written as fast as humanly possible just to prove that the author can crank out novels at an amazing pace. Having said that, does this book have aliens? Check. Military intrigue? Check. And as the title implies, this book also has a little mutiny thrown in for good measure. Nothing earth shattering ... I enjoyed it, but I wish the author would have spent a little more time fleshing things out.

16. Zoom by Iain Carson and Vijay V Vaitheeswaran

This is a pretty decent book about the efforts to make more fuel efficient cars, and what kinds of fuels are in the running. What is more interesting is the authors' conclusion that we should be demanding more from our government to make this happen. So, conservatives probably won't like that conclusion, but the authors make a pretty convincing arguement.

17. Universe on a T-Shirt by Dan Falk

A very short and concise history of man's effort to explain the universe around him, from the discovery of the idea of the atom, to Copernicus's heliocentric model, Maxwell's theories of electromagnetism, to Einstein's theory of relativity, to string theory and a whole lot in between. As comedian Brian Regan says, "I turned on the TV to watch a show about string theory. The show started at 8:00 and at 8:03 my head exploded." Unfortunately, I have to agree. String theory is a difficult concept to grasp, especially its scale (very tiny) to the huge efforts it would take to test it (solar system sized). Oh well, I'm probably a better person for having read this.

18. Clemente: The Passion and Grace of Baseball's Last Hero by David Maraniss

I must admit, I didn't know much about Roberto Clemente, one of the most famous baseball players ever, but I found out my kids actually learn about him in school (they attend Park Spanish Immersion). So, I thought I would check him out. He was definitely a great baseball player, but he was also an incredibly proud man who didn't let anything negative about him slide past his notice; he was a man who was phenomenally loyal to his friends and family; he was a man who gave a lot himself to his home country and people in need (as is evidenced by his tragic death); and he was a huge hypochondriac. A lot of his maladies were real, but wow! Did he ever complain about everything happening to his body. Another thing I found interesting about this book was the description of the segregation that black ballplayers had to face in Spring Training in Florida. Clemente, quite understandably, could not stand it. Anyway, mission accomplished: I learned a lot about Roberto Clemente.

19. Personal Days by Ed Park

A pretty funny book about office culture that follows the mishaps, firings, and nicknames of a fictional office in Manhattan. I'd be surprised if anyone couldn't relate to something in this book concerning the cubicle culture that we are forced to work in.

20. One Step Closer by Christian Batalden Scharen

It is amazing how many Christian themes the rock band U2 can espouse, and still not be considered a Christian rock band. This book tackles all these themes, especially the idea of the "theology of the cross," as well as the theme of social justice. A good book, it would have probably been better to discuss it within the context of a Bible study or something. As it was, I found it easy to put down and unfortunately easy to forget.

Posted by Shane at 8:41 PM | Comments (14)

November 26, 2008

Speaking of Trolleys ...

Minnpost.com has a great article called 150 Minnesota Moments We'd Just as Soon Forget.

This is a picture of people tearing up some trolley tracks in St. Paul in 1955. At one point the Twin Cities and suburbs had a very extensive trolley system that quite frankly went all over the place. As we spend billions now on light rail lines, the decision to tear up these trolley lines sure seems at the very least short sighted, and maybe even quite painful to think about.

And as an aside, I must say that writing an article about the 150 worst moments in Minnesota history sure fits with our reputation for Norwegian/Germanic pessimism. Makes me chuckle ...

Posted by Shane at 9:04 AM | Comments (19)

November 25, 2008

The Trolley Problem

From Rollback by Robert J. Sawyer:

["S]ay a streetcar is out of control, rushing along its tracks. And say there are five people stuck on those tracks, unable to get away in time -- if the train hits, it'll kill them all. But you happen to be watching all this from a bridge over the tracks, and on the bridge are the switching controls, including a lever that if you pull it will cause the streetcar to be diverted to another track, off to the left, missing the five people. What do you do?"

"Pull the lever of course," he said ...

"That's what almost everyone says ..." [she said] "Most people feel a moral obligation to intervene in situations where human life is at risk. Oh, but I forgot to tell you one thing. There's a really big guy stuck on the other track. If you divert the streetcar, he'll be killed. Now what do you do?"

... "Well, um, I'd -- I guess I'd still pull the lever."

... "That's what most people say. Why?"

"Because only one person dies rather than five."

He could hear in her voice that she was smiling. "A Trekker to the core. 'The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.' No wonder that's what Mr. Spock believes.; it's clearly the product of rational thinking. Now what about this? Say there's no second track. And say instead of being the one hapless fellow stuck on the left, the big guy isn't stuck at all. Instead he's standing right next to you on the bridge. You know for a fact that if you push him off so that he falls in front of the streetcar, hitting him will be enough to make it stop before it hits the five other people. But you yourself are a little guy. The streetcar wouldn't be stopped by hitting you, so there's no point in jumping yourself, but it'll definitely be stopped by hitting this big fellow. Now what do you do?"

"Nothing."

[He] could feel her head nodding. "Again, that's what most people say -- they wouldn't do a thing. But why not?"

"Because, um, because it's wrong to ... well, ah..." He frowned, opened his mouth to try again, but then closed it.

"See?" [she] said. "They're comparable situations. In both scenarios you choose to have one guy die--the same guy, in fact, to save five others. But in the first, you do it by throwing a lever. In the second, you actually push the guy to his death. The rational question is exactly the same. But the second scenario feels differently emotionally. For most people, what was judged right in the first scenario is judged wrong in the second."

Interesting conversation regarding the "emotional ethical response" and the "logical ethical response." One could argue that proximity to the "big guy" creates a kind of tenuous bond between him and the person either pushing him off or pulling the lever. The greater the distance the lesser the bond and the easier the decision becomes.

Posted by Shane at 8:07 AM | Comments (8)

November 19, 2008

Arches

I like to walk around campus. For ten years I have walked around every nook and cranny I can find on this campus and I still haven't discovered half of the interesting things to see. This is especially true since they started construction on TCF Bank Stadium. In fact, I can't seem to walk around anything but the construction site since they started building.

One thing I have recently noticed is that they have started to hang the arches around the main entrances to the stadium. When you look at the virtual tour of the exterior of the stadium you will note five different areas where there is a big arch and a white overhang. The virtual tour simply doesn't do these arches any justice. They are simply majestic.

Unfortunately, these pictures won't do them any justice either. But at least I tried.

When you look at the stadium from Williams Arena you should immediately see the big arch being constructed on the south side of the horse-shoe:

Here is a close up of that arch. Note the immensity of it, the carved "Minnesota" curved around the top, the ginourmous staircase on the inside ... it is really quite spectacular:

There are (or will be) four other big arches like this one around the exterior of the stadium. This is the arch at the southeast end. Again, it features the word "Minnesota" around the top:

The next arch is probably the most special as it is the student entrance. It can be found on the northeast side of the stadium and it features the carving "Hats Off to Thee" around the top:

Again, note the huge staircase going up to the field. If you are in a wheel chair or if you have trouble walking up stairs, it probably sucks, but to look at it ... well it looks pretty slick. This arch also features a column in the middle with a "Ski-U-Mah" carving and two other columns with carvings that thank the students for their contributions.

Finally, at the west end of the horse shoe, one of the arches is still in the process of being hung. It looks like they use some pretty hefty duty braces to help hold the stones up:

Again, I wish these pictures could do justice to these entrances. No other college football stadium in the country will hold a candle to how majestic this place will be. Of course, that is only my opinion (and I'm a Minnesota fan to boot) but every detail seems to be important at this place, from the sidewalks, to the facade, to the scoreboard, to the seats, to the locker room, to ... well ... the arches.

Until next time...

Posted by Shane at 6:31 PM | Comments (7)

November 9, 2008

On second thought ...

On second thought, who cares about a stupid old jug anyway? I mean, seriously. What is the Little Brown Jug? It is a piece of crap jug that used to hold water. It is the equivalent of today's plastic Nalgene bottle. Really. Michigan and Minnesota pretty much play for a Nalgene bottle. Who wants a stupid Nalgene bottle? I sure don't.

Not only that, but the Little Brown Jug is ugly too. It has a crappy paint job and the colors don't even match. Maroon on one side and a dark blue on the other. Ugly.

Plus, here we are, getting ready to move into a brand new stadium, and Michigan comes by trying to pawn their crap on us. What is one of the first thing you do when you move out of your house? You get rid of all the crap you don't want to move into your new house. Let's see ... ugly brown jug that can't even hold water any more? Brewster was wise to tell Rodriguez to take the jug back to Michigan. We've got enough to move as it is!

Now, the other two trophies ... at least they have some usefulness. Paul Bunyan's Axe? If there are some fireplaces in the new stadium it will be nice to have an axe to cut some wood. And Floyd of Rosedale? Well, that is just a high quality piece of art. We are going to need some art to spruce up the place.

So, who cares about the Little Brown Jug. By far the stupidest trophy in all of college football ... can't even hold water ... stupid jug.

Man, I wanted that stupid jug.

Posted by Shane at 4:48 PM | Comments (6)

November 6, 2008

We want the Jug!

The Northwestern game was a punch in the gut, no doubt. But as I said in a previous post, for me this year is all about winning the Jug. Sure, I want desperately for the Gophers to go back to the Rose Bowl and I have less and less doubt that Brewster will take them there one day. I just don't think this is the year. Having said that, it is definitely a year that we can win the Jug. And that will be huge.

The Jug is the trophy that started it all. It is the oldest trophy (I don't care what Arizona or Arizona State say about it) and it is the most meaningful. Minnesota football under Tim Brewster cannot be taken seriously in the Big Ten until we beat Michigan. This is the year to do it.

Michigan is down this year. And I argue that the loss to Northwestern has focused the Minnesota football team even more towards the task at hand. A win will give us the Jug until 2011. So, not only will potential recruits see TCF Bank Stadium, they will also see the most special and meaningful trophy in all of college football.

That is how you build a winning program. You win the trophy games and the recruits will follow. A Rose Bowl appearance starts with the trophy games. Get the Jug, get the Axe, get the Pig.

Get them all, and the 1960 team will have nothing on the Golden Gophers football team of the next three years.

We are entering a new "golden age" of Golden Gopher football. It all starts Saturday.

Posted by Shane at 8:34 PM | Comments (3)

November 5, 2008

Jug week

Words cannot describe how much I want the Gophers to win the Little Brown Jug. I want it bad. However, before I get to some thoughts on the LBJ, I thought I would post an oldie-but-goodie Greet Machine entry that I originally wrote on October 12 2005:

It is entitled: My visit with the Little Brown Jug. Enjoy!

---

Yesterday I was determined to see the Little Brown Jug. Nothing would stand in my way. I intentionally did not go to see it on Monday because I knew it would be crowded and I wanted to take my time with it. So, at around 11:00 AM Tuesday I set out from my office for the Gopher Football Hall of Fame at the Gibson/Nagurski Football Practice Facility on the East Bank of the U of M. I thought it would still be on display.

I was wrong. When I got there people were setting up for Mason's weekly press conference and the HOF was filled with tables. Some people from Famous Dave's were also there setting up a table of food. I turned to the first person I saw and asked as calmly as I could, "Where is the Jug? Do you know where the Jug is?"

He answered, "Dude, I work for Famous Dave's. You'll have to ask someone else."

Man! I was ticked. I thought, "I should have come on Monday! Idiot!" So I stood there stewing a little bit.

Then I looked across the HOF and saw Pam Borton, the women's basketball coach, standing at the top of the stairs. I don't know why, but this prompted me to walk up the stairs. "Maybe Pam knows where the Jug is," I thought.

When I got to the top of the stairs she began talking with someone else, but I noticed I was at the doors to the football program's main offices. I could see some of the football team milling about through the glass doors and a student secretary sitting at the front desk. My determination knew no bounds! I walked into the offices and strode right to the front desk like I owned the place.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw in a side room the box that houses the greatest trophy in college football. My heart jumped! "It is in here somewhere," I thought. So, I turned to the student secretary and said, "Do you know where the Jug is?"

She answered, "Do you want to see it?"

"Oh yes," I said, "Very much."

So, she got up and went into the side room where I saw the box. Ah, but instead of reaching into the box, she reached under the table the box was sitting on and pulled out the Jug. I thought to myself, "Now there is Minnesota ingenuity! If a thief came to steal the Jug he would think it is in the box. He wouldn't even think to look under the table! Good thinking Mase! Under the table! Genius!"

She brought the Jug out and set it on the reception desk. Oh man ... words cannot describe the feeling of seeing this piece of history just sitting there right in front of me. So many games, so many players, so many memories. It has its own aura around it that you just can't escape. So, I started to take some pictures:

I asked, "Can I touch it?" and she said, "Sure!"

I couldn't believe it. So, I spun it around and found the most recent score:

From an office down the hall I heard a voice, "We just painted the score on! Don't mess up the paint!"

Does anyone else think this is as weird as I think it is? I mean, this Jug is literally priceless! It is irreplaceable! If it was ever put up for sale at an auction what would a Michigan or Minnesota booster be willing to pay for it? Millions I would wager. And here they are letting me, a total stranger, touch it and spin it around seemingly without a care for its safety. I was in heaven!

So, I asked, "Can I pick it up?" The student secretary looked at me kind of strange and said, "Well sure. Go ahead. Do you want me to take a picture of you with it?"

"Yes!" I answered. I gave her my camera and I picked up the Jug. The words of Lloyd Carr, the Michigan head coach, repeated in my head:

"I don't hold it up in front of the team ... I don't trust myself," Carr said. "I certainly don't want to be remembered as the guy who destroyed the Little Brown Jug. Anybody that handles it needs to be careful with it. Sometimes I worry after the game about the players."

I can't believe they let me pick it up. I can't believe they let anyone touch it! It is amazing to me. And yet, pick it up I did, and here is the picture to prove it:

I may not look "giddy" but I was really, really "giddy." Holding the Jug is something not a whole lot of people get to do, especially if you are from Minnesota.

Anyway, I put down the jug, thanked the student secretary and I walked through the door. A football player near the door saw me and my goofy grin and he gave me a goofy grin of his own. I laughed and walked out the door.

It is truly strange how happy this Little Brown Jug can make people. 19 years of frustration wiped away will do that I guess. Now the Golden Gophers will play for the Axe, but for me the season is already a success. It would certainly be nice to beat Wisconsin, don't get me wrong. I will trudge back to the HOF and ask to see the Axe, too. I may even pose with it like I am smashing the Jug! (Or maybe not). But having the Jug ... that is enough for me. It has been a while since I have been so happy to be a fan of a Minnesota sports team. I thank the Golden Gophers football team for that.

Posted by Shane at 2:31 PM | Comments (0)

September 30, 2008

What I would do ...

.. if I was ...

Zygi Wilf

I would fire Brad Childress so fast it would make your head spin. I would name Leslie Frazier as head coach and myself as defensive coordinator. You heard me. I would gather the defense together and play this video:

Then I would proceed to blitz on every play at every game. I would even blitz when when the Vikings are on offense. And I would scream at the top of my lungs:

"I don't want them to gain another YARD, you blitz all night! They cross the line of scrimmage I swear to God I'm going to take every one of you out. You make sure they remember FOREVER, the night they played the Vikings!!!"

That's what I would do.

... and if I was ...

Tim Brewster

I would say all the right things to the fans and media. "One game at a time," I would say, "We're getting ready for Indiana this week. We aren't thinking about any game in the future." I would say this before the Illinois game, and the Purdue game, and the Northwestern game. "One game at a time."

But secretly, in the depths of my very soul, I would be preparing for the Michigan game. I would watch film of Michigan football 24 hours a day. I would join Michigan football message boards and talk smack. I would think about winning the Little Brown Jug until I couldn't think about anything else.

In fact, I would think about the Jug so much I would replace the word "tremendous" with the word "Jug" in daily conversation and I wouldn't even know I was doing it! For example:

"Indiana has a Jug defense. We are going to have to do a Jug amount of preparation if we are going to score any touchdowns against them."

and

"Wow honey, that is some Jug beef brisket you've just made here. Jug jugilicious!"

Because winning the Little Brown Jug should be the number one, numero uno, numéro un priority of Gopher football this year. First of all, Michigan sucks this year so it is very, very possible to win this game, but more importantly ...

On every recruiting visit until the year 2011 I would walk into a recruit's house, put the Little Brown Jug on the kitchen table and say, "Son, I need you to help me keep this."

It would be a done deal every time.

That's what I would do.

... and if I was ...

Ron Gardenhire

I would start Scott Baker tonight on TWO DAYS REST! That's right! You heard me. TWO DAYS REST. This is it folks! This is where the boys become men. Win or go home. And who would you rather have out there right now, Nick Blackburn on 5 days rest or Scott Baker on TWO?

I think we all know the answer.

Scott Baker is the ace of this staff and we need an epic performance. Nick Blackburn has a chance, but more than likely he is going to get shelled.

That's what I would do.

Who is with me?

Posted by Shane at 10:18 PM | Comments (12)

September 27, 2008

See you in Section 307

Summer of 2010. My two sons and I hop on our bikes and head down the Cedar Lake Trail from St. Louis Park into downtown Minneapolis. Our destination is Target Field.

We arrive at the ballpark after a 20 minute ride and lock up our bikes at one of the many, many bike racks (please?). I approach the ticket counter ...

"Three tickets in section 307, row 1 please," I say to the ticket agent confidently.

"We only have tickets in row 3 of section 307," she replies.

I sigh audibly. "Fine," I say, "I'll take those." I hand her $30 and my boys and I enter the ballpark.

Passing all the concession stands and souvenir booths ("No, I will not buy you a Twins t-shirt for $40"), we climb up to our seats.

"Tickets please," the usher says as we try to slip buy.

"Seriously?" I answer, "Do you really think someone is going to try to sneak into the cheapest section in the ballpark?"

I disgustedly show him our tickets. The nerve of some people! The usher nods and we finally get to our seats.

This is our view:

"$10 bucks!" I say to my boys as we take our seats, "Not too shabby! Not too shabby at all."

My younger son says, "Dad, I'm hungry!" So, I reach into my pocket and pull out one of three ham sandwiches I made before the game.

"Ha ha!" I exclaim. "Pohlad isn't going to get a $7 hot dog out of me!" My son unenthusiastically consumes the sandwich.

Ah, it is a beautiful day. 75 degrees with a slight breeze. Glen Perkins is on the mound against the Cleveland Indians. Through 5 innings the Twins and the Indians play a close game, but then in the bottom of the 6th Justin Morneau hits a grand slam to bust the game wide open. The crowd roars its approval.

After the cheering stops, I hear once again a familiar chant off into the distance:

"No stadium tax! Target Field is corporate welfare for billionaires!""

I smile, I look at the open sky and the green grass, and I think, "Those morons will never stop."

Joe Nathan comes in at the top of the 9th and closes the door. The final score is 6-2 Twins. My two sons and I go back to our bikes and ride home into the sunset.

It has been a wonderful day.

Posted by Shane at 4:26 PM | Comments (25)

September 24, 2008

The Merkle Boner and its aftermath

The New York Times has written a great article about the "Merkle Boner" which long before Steve Bartman or Bill Buckner provided baseball with its most memorable "bonehead" moment.

Reading the article you certainly have some sympathy for Fred Merkle, who actually had a relatively long and productive major league baseball career. However, what I find most fascinating is the aftermath of the base-running error. As a result, the Cubs and the Giants had to meet again a couple of weeks later to decide the National League pennant. The NYT article describes the rabid fans that tried to catch a glimpse of the game at the fabled Polo Grounds:

On the afternoon of Oct. 8 [1908], an enormous crowd engulfed the Polo Grounds, willing to do anything to see a game that would decide the pennant. They teetered along Coogan’s Bluff above the ballpark; climbed up on the grandstand roof; perched on the elevated train viaduct out past left field. One man fell to his death from the el; another fell from a telegraph pole and broke his neck. A wedge of fans broke through a wooden fence into the outfield and had to be pushed back by mounted police. Later, they tried setting the fence on fire.

Today, if anything even close to this kind of fan craziness happened at a game, the game would be cancelled. Everyone go home. In 1908, however, this seems to have been somewhat normal or at least tolerated. The article also describes the extreme abuse Giants fans hurled at the Cubs, as well as dangerous items thrown from the stands:

Foul names might have been the least of their worries. The New York Journal reported that Cubs catcher Johnny Kling, chasing a pop foul, had to dodge “two beer bottles, a drinking glass and a derby hat.�

But what really fascinates me is the reaction of the Giants fans after the Cubs won the game 4-2. Could people really get away with this stuff back then?

The moment Brown got the last out in the Cubs’ 4-2 victory, he and his teammates ran as fast as they could to the center-field clubhouse.

They were not fast enough. Pitcher Jack Pfiester was knifed in the shoulder, and Chance was punched so hard in the throat that he sustained broken cartilage. At least three other Cubs were struck, and the police had to hold shut the clubhouse doors with guns drawn.

"Pitcher Jack Pfiester was knifed" ... that is stunning. While it is entirely possible that something like that could happen today I think it is safe to say that today's fans are not nearly as rabid as they were at the turn of the century.

If you are a superstitious type of person, you may note that 1908 is the last year the Cubs won a World Series. It can certainly be argued that the Cubs got into the World Series based on a very dubious call that was made hours after the game ended. Perhaps the baseball gods are still punishing them for this injustice.

Posted by Shane at 9:55 PM | Comments (1)

September 18, 2008

The Mahatma

"Things worthwhile generally don't just happen. Luck is a fact, but should not be a factor. Good luck is what is left over after intelligence and effort have combined at their best. Negligence or indifference or inattention are usually reviewed from an unlucky seat. The law of cause and effect and causality both work the same with inexorable exactitudes. Luck is the residue of design."

Branch Rickey, 1950

Posted by Shane at 12:07 PM | Comments (0)

Driving across the bridge

We drove across the 35W bridge this morning. The last time I drove across it was the night before it collapsed.

Having this open is a bit of good news in an otherwise bleak world. Even the simple act of driving across it made me a bit happier.

Posted by Shane at 8:34 AM | Comments (1)

September 15, 2008

Save Target Field!

Just starting to prepare materials for the inevitable ...

Posted by Shane at 1:10 PM | Comments (3)