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November 29, 2007
And the winner is ...
Mr. Krabs: There is a word which describes you Spongebob and that word is... um...
Fish 1: Dork!
Mr. Krabs: No, no that's not it
Fish 2: Goofball!
Mr. Krabs: Closer, but no.
Fish 3: Dingaling!
Fish 4: Wingnut!
Old Lady: Knucklehead McSpazatron!
Yes!!! The greatest putdown of all time: Knucklehead McSpazatron. There is no better way to describe a person that has ticked you off for some reason while at the same time probably saying something really stupid.
I have decided that I am going to pick a Knucklehead McSpazatron once a week. This week I have decided that there is only one choice that makes sense.
Behold! I present to you the first person to win this prestigious honor:
For signing with the Angels and not taking a paycut to stay with the Twins (the nerve!), for lying to the fans and saying money has nothing to do with it (do I look stupid?), for not even considering the Twins generous 3 year $45 million offer (more than fair I say) ...
But most of all, for saying the Twins won't be able to attract any free agents because our new stadium won't include a roof (what a sissy!), I name Torii Hunter my Knucklehead McSpazatron of the Week.
I am sure you can hardly wait for next week's pick!
Posted by snackeru at November 29, 2007 8:46 PM
Comments
the question is: if you're at the dome opening night, will you boo Torii or cheer Torii?
Posted by: haasertime at November 29, 2007 10:11 PM
Shane, I'm curious what you know/think about a couple of things:
-There was an article in the paper a few weeks ago about a lawsuit brought over the stadium by some environmental wacko (Leslie Davis maybe?) where the judge ordered them to produce a $45 million bond to halt construction while the case was heard. (Thank God.) Anyway, I have not heard boo about it since. Maybe the lack of $45 million made them go away, but do you know for sure if this is dead.
-#2 If/When the Twins trade Johan, probably for mostly prospects, leaving a payroll of around $42 million next year, just how loud do you think the wailing over 'we built them a stadium, and now they're fleecing us' is going to get? Both in the general public and among the politicians? Are there any hidden land mines the John Marty's of the world can still try to throw in the stadium's path? Somehow I still feel there's a snake in the grass.
Posted by: David H. at November 30, 2007 12:08 AM
Eventually, the rest of the world will come to know what I figured out a long time ago: Torii Hunter is a dink.
Posted by: SBG at November 30, 2007 7:18 AM
I still like Torii.
Posted by: Kurtis at November 30, 2007 8:41 AM
Be real people. How loyal to your employer would you be if someone else offered to double your salary? Good luck Torii you'll be missed. Point your blame at the multi-billionaire that owns the team and won't spend a few bucks.
Posted by: jcase at November 30, 2007 8:44 AM
Yea! I'm not the first winner!
Posted by: Cheesehead Craig at November 30, 2007 8:47 AM
You'd think Cheesehead would get some sort of Lifetime achievement award. Maybe call it the Cheesehead Craig Knucklehead McSpazatron award.
Posted by: Freealonzo at November 30, 2007 8:55 AM
Go back to Iceland you Commie!
Posted by: Cheesehead Craig at November 30, 2007 9:36 AM
Hold on Cheesehead, I think Free is on to something! You could win this award every week! A Lifetime achievement award may be in order.
I still like Torii too. Just because I like someone, though, doesn't mean they can't say something stupid every once in a while. As SBG points out, for Torii it was more like every other day. And I will be cheering for Torii when he returns to Minnesota. As I said before, he entertained me greatly over the years and deserves my thanks.
And David, to answer your questions, the environmental-based lawsuit of a couple of weeks ago is dead in the water and the wack-job that brought it up should be thankful the judge made it too costly to do so.
As far as the payroll reduction affecting the stadium goes, people will definitely squawk but the fact of the matter is the ballpark is being built. Money has been spent (a lot of it actually) and their just isn't any turning back at this point. It is a done deal. As far as I know the stadium bill as passed does not include any stipulations that the Twins must have a certain payroll, or even spend a certain amount of their revenues on payroll.
It is obvious Bill Smith is trying to build a winner for 2010. The players we'll get for Johan will have a lot to do with that, of course, but I am still optimistic for the future. Bill Smith is certainly making things exciting, isn't he?
Posted by: Shane at November 30, 2007 9:50 AM
Nobody else gets a Lifetime Acheivement Award around here, so I'm honored.
Posted by: Cheesehead Craig at November 30, 2007 10:29 AM
Was there really anything Torii could have said that wouldn't have been upsetting? The most popular Twins player (not the best - but most popular) since Kirby? Did he put his foot in his mouth about the stadium? Yeah, probably.
I'll be at opening day - but I'm only going to boo him if he hits a dinger off Johan. If Johan's gone too - I'm waiting for the Saints' Opening Day!
Posted by: barry at November 30, 2007 11:03 AM
I truly LOVE the idea of your weekly award. But I think you are being harsh on Torii. I like a guy who will say what he wants to. I was just listening to Chad Greenway speak about the Lions game and it was the same old crap, "You know were really respect the (insert the opponents name here), "And they are a dangerous team". Why not a "We are looking past the Lions to the Niners game because the Lions suck right now". That's the kind os stuff you got from Torii.
And I appreciated his candor on the stadium roof as he is simply saying what everyone is thinking but afraid to say because they are too Minnesota Nice (if that even exists anymore!).
A better choice for your first weekly award would have been the STribs story talking about how the Twins will get no value in return for trading Santana. Are you kidding me? Any time you pit the Yankees and Red Sox in a bidding war you know you're going to get HIGHER value because they'll up the ante just to keep said player off the other team! Not to mention that Torii was on KFAN saying he thinks the Angles will now make a major play for Santana. And don't forget about my Mets!
Anyway, love the idea. I think people will have fun with it!
Posted by: Brian Maas at November 30, 2007 12:26 PM
Sorry everyone, Kevin McHale has this thing locked up.
Posted by: chapman at November 30, 2007 3:10 PM
Shane - please keep some trophies available for Tim Brewster next fall.
Jeff T.
Posted by: Jeff T. at November 30, 2007 6:32 PM
Personally, I see no excuse for the Twins not just signing him to a 6/$130 m extension or something in that range. In the new stadium, they can afford it and are just making excuses.
Regarding the stadium, Shane I wasn't thinking there was anything faulty in the bill or that it would be completely derailed. I just wonder if the motivation of an election year and the wailing over Santana might get some 'creative thinking' out of the John Marty's of the world and encourage them to do something just to be a pain in the rear and throw HC for a loop in some way. You know, maybe pass a law banning the operation of a garbage incinerator within 2 miles of any outdoor venue that seats over 30,000 people or something like that.
Posted by: David H. at November 30, 2007 8:10 PM
Sure Carl Pohlad could afford to give Torii Hunter 6/$130, but he could afford to give me the same thing. The problem is, in 2011, neither Torii nor myself are going to be productive Major League centerfielders.
Posted by: Will Young at December 2, 2007 12:03 PM
Hmm. Well if I was unclear, I was certainly referring to giving Johan Santana 6 years/$130 million not Torii Hunter. I am not quite that nuts. I have no problem with the Twins letting Hunter go, but there is really no excuse not to pony up for Santana.
Posted by: David H. at December 3, 2007 2:47 AM
As far as the payroll reduction affecting the stadium goes, people will definitely squawk but the fact of the matter is the ballpark is being built. Money has been spent (a lot of it actually) and their just isn't any turning back at this point. It is a done deal. As far as I know the stadium bill as passed does not include any stipulations that the Twins must have a certain payroll, or even spend a certain amount of their revenues on payroll.
So you either endorse the shananigans of purporting to spend additional revenue to field a more competitive team in order to bribe the general public opinion to endorse the stadium, or; you care more about sitting outdoors than you do being competitive. Which one is it? and if its the latter, why not visit the Saints instead?
Posted by: Jaboz at December 3, 2007 9:55 AM
How a club that wants to be considered "Major League" and in the face of an additional 40 million dollars plus, per year, for the next 30+ years can orchestrate a campaign that pretends it necessary to trade the single most dominant pitcher IN THE GAME and in his prime is laughable. This is NOT a major league team no matter where they play. And you morons who can't get over '87 & '91; climb into your time machine and leave the rest of us, in this economic reality, alone.
Teams and communities DREAM of having a #1 like Santana and for most, it never happens, and now we're going to piss it away. Where's the outrage? Its all "resignation" and "what can we get." We and the Twins deserve NOTHING for being stupid enough to endorse getting rid of such a precious talent. Santana is the type of "once in a lifetime" talent that we must savor well into the twilight of his career.
Posted by: D at December 3, 2007 6:38 PM
