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September 27, 2008

See you in Section 307


Summer of 2010. My two sons and I hop on our bikes and head down the Cedar Lake Trail from St. Louis Park into downtown Minneapolis. Our destination is Target Field.

We arrive at the ballpark after a 20 minute ride and lock up our bikes at one of the many, many bike racks (please?). I approach the ticket counter ...

"Three tickets in section 307, row 1 please," I say to the ticket agent confidently.

"We only have tickets in row 3 of section 307," she replies.

I sigh audibly. "Fine," I say, "I'll take those." I hand her $30 and my boys and I enter the ballpark.

Passing all the concession stands and souvenir booths ("No, I will not buy you a Twins t-shirt for $40"), we climb up to our seats.

"Tickets please," the usher says as we try to slip buy.

"Seriously?" I answer, "Do you really think someone is going to try to sneak into the cheapest section in the ballpark?"

I disgustedly show him our tickets. The nerve of some people! The usher nods and we finally get to our seats.

This is our view:


"$10 bucks!" I say to my boys as we take our seats, "Not too shabby! Not too shabby at all."

My younger son says, "Dad, I'm hungry!" So, I reach into my pocket and pull out one of three ham sandwiches I made before the game.

"Ha ha!" I exclaim. "Pohlad isn't going to get a $7 hot dog out of me!" My son unenthusiastically consumes the sandwich.

Ah, it is a beautiful day. 75 degrees with a slight breeze. Glen Perkins is on the mound against the Cleveland Indians. Through 5 innings the Twins and the Indians play a close game, but then in the bottom of the 6th Justin Morneau hits a grand slam to bust the game wide open. The crowd roars its approval.

After the cheering stops, I hear once again a familiar chant off into the distance:

"No stadium tax! Target Field is corporate welfare for billionaires!""

I smile, I look at the open sky and the green grass, and I think, "Those morons will never stop."

Joe Nathan comes in at the top of the 9th and closes the door. The final score is 6-2 Twins. My two sons and I go back to our bikes and ride home into the sunset.

It has been a wonderful day.

Posted by snackeru at September 27, 2008 4:26 PM


That is not a very bad view at all from section 307. Seems like a good deal for $10. By the way, you would never get the ham sandwiches by security. Good ole' Uncle Carl will have some sort of alarm system installed to make sure no one sneaks in free food.

Curt in Grand Forks

Posted by: Curt Hanson at September 27, 2008 6:17 PM

Why is Nathan pitching in a non-save situation?

Posted by: Jeff A at September 27, 2008 8:49 PM

Ummm ... it is because the Twins have been so dominating recently (they've won like ... 6 straight games by a margin of at least 10 runs each) that Gardy felt Nathan needed to get some work in. Yeah, that's it ...

And good point Curt. I shall have to devise a way to get my sandwiches past security! Where there is a will, there is a way!

Posted by: Shane at September 27, 2008 10:54 PM

But shane, you missed out on the part where you and your kids will be selling t-shirts in front of the Minnikadha storage building. Dont' forget to buy 2 bags of peanuts from me and my kids.

Posted by: freealonzo at September 27, 2008 11:10 PM

Does that mean you're not going in on a partial season ticket plan with Free, Jeff and me? Disappointing!

Posted by: Snyder at September 28, 2008 10:35 AM

Yah - I agree with Snyder! We're looking for cheap seats, you know.

Posted by: Jett T. at September 28, 2008 3:48 PM

You'll only be able to afford the cheap seats and having to bring ham sandwiches because you'll be paying so much in the unconstitutional stadium tax.

You forgot to add in the parts of your story when you and your kids have to put on your nose plugs do to the garbage disposal smell and how the field is covered in a slight haze from smoke from the disposal as well.

Posted by: You're all commie lemmings at September 29, 2008 9:05 AM

Hey! One of the morons who won't stop! Welcome! I would offer you a ham sandwich, but I don't think you will be willing to enter the ballpark to receive it.

And Jeff and Snyder, I wasn't even aware that we were discussing buying a partial season ticket package together. Well, count me in!

Posted by: Shane at September 29, 2008 12:31 PM

Ironic about the ham sandwich given this stadium is the definition of political pork.

Posted by: Pig Farm at September 29, 2008 1:01 PM

Hmm, Hey Jeff, I guess we know who DOESN'T read your blog :o)

Hey Pig Farm, I though the ballpark was the definition of corporate welfare, not political pork. Thanks for clearing that up for me.

Hey Commie Lemmings, IN YOUR FACE! One of the biggest enjoyments for me while I sit in the $10 Target Field seats with Jeff, Snyder and Shane is knowing that your sad pitiful life is that much more sad, that much more pitiful because we are having a blast in a ballpark that we fought for and helped pay for.

Posted by: Freealonzo at September 29, 2008 1:51 PM

Grr! I'll have you know that What Jeff Thinks is one of my favorite blogs! I seem to have missed the comments for the entry on Sept. 19th though. Sue me. Without WJT, I wouldn't know a Sasquatch from a Wookie! I am an avid reader!

And yeah, Commie Lemmings! You just got pwnd! The clue train just left and not only are you not on board, you got run over!

Posted by: Shane at September 29, 2008 2:01 PM

Sounds great. I just hope you are right about the $10 seats and being able to bring outside food in. Also the bike racks ;-)

Posted by: ldfs at September 29, 2008 2:14 PM

Wow Free,
I truly do pity someone like you who simply enjoys the idea of others suffering whether it is true or not. I recommend that you get some underwear that will make you less irritable, yours is obviously too tight. That and lots of therapy will help.

You "fought" for this? Really? Were you at any of the meetings or did you meet with any of the legislators? Nope. Too busy posting what was on your ipod. Yes, I clicked to your blog.

So Free, your attempt at pwnage is an epic fail. Go see the Wizard of Oz and get a brain.

Posted by: You're all commie lemmings at September 29, 2008 3:55 PM

Um, commie lemmings might want to review the archives and realize that this blog was created specifically to lobby for a new Twins ballpark.

It was also cited as playing an influential role in getting a ballpark bill passed. See


So, commie lemmings, yes, you have been pwned. Deal with it.

Posted by: Snyder at September 29, 2008 4:10 PM

My comments were directed at Free. Not at this site. Please take some remedial reading comprehension classes Snyder. You're making yourself look bad.


Posted by: You're all commie lemmings at September 29, 2008 4:31 PM

I'm just glad Shane reads my blog.

Posted by: Jett T. at September 29, 2008 6:52 PM

I seriously doubt that will be the view from that section. The stadium picture clearly shows 3-4 levels of seats below and in front of the top deck, yet in Shane's "view" picture, we barely see 3-4 rows in front of us. It's clearly a zoomed or cropped representation of the view from that section. Are we now judging views with the assumption that all spectators bring binoculars?

For a real laugh, check out the Twins' current Metrodome seating chart, and click on some of the upper deck sections for their super-useful alleged view from that section:

Posted by: spycake at September 29, 2008 9:06 PM

You're right commie lemmings. I am a shallow person who should aspire to be more sympathic and kind towards people. I merely lash out due to my own guilt about how this Twins stadium really wasn't wanted by the general public.

I shall work towards being a better person and in fact, I'll even boycott going to the new stadium for the first year. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

Posted by: Freealonzo at September 29, 2008 11:04 PM

Hey Spycake, remember Shane is really tall (that makes two things he has in common with Kevin McHale) so he wouldn't even see the 3-4 rows in front of him, they are too far below him. Maybe the Twins should rename the feature "Shane View."

Also for everyone else, the apology above is not from me. Someone stole my name and URL and wrote that apology. While I may be a shallow person and I am always working to be a better person, the rest of post is false. I guess calling commie lemmings sad and pitiful got under his skin.

Posted by: (The Real) Freealonzo at September 30, 2008 8:09 AM

Hmmmm ... I'm not sure I like what the Real Freealonzo is implying here. The other thing I have in common with Kevin McHale had better be that I am an awesome basketball player or there will be consequences!

The Real Freealonzo had better learn how to apologize like the Fake Freealonzo ...

Posted by: Shane at September 30, 2008 8:57 AM

I miss the site for a day or two and there's all sorts of fun stuff going on. Commie Lemmings, Free having a multiple personality, Shane having Joe Nathan coming in for a non-save situation and thinking his kids will eat ham sandwiches...

I too hope that there are bike racks. I'd love to ride to a game with my son along with Shane and his brood. I'd actually fork out the cash for a hot dog for me and my son. I'm a sucker for hot dogs at baseball games.

Posted by: Cheesehead Craig at September 30, 2008 9:00 AM

You are welcome to join us CC! I take it you don't want me to make you a ham sandwich?

And I gotta admit, that link from spycake is hilarious. At the very least the Twins must expect everyone to have a 50X zoom camera with them at a game in the Metrodome. Some of those views from the upper deck outfield are downright comical in their dishonesty.

Posted by: Shane at September 30, 2008 9:06 AM

You know what else is dishonest? The way the stadium was shoved down the public's throats without a vote.

Have fun dressing up as a ham sandwich at the games Shane.

Posted by: Dishonest Abe at September 30, 2008 12:03 PM

Getting back to Commie, archives once again are our friends. Please note that the ballpark bill passed in May of 2006.


Free's blog started in July of 2006.


So, of course, his blog is not nearly as ballpark-focused as Shane's has been, though you'll find plenty of posts about the site negotiations and such that followed the bill passage.

And Free did lobby elected officials, as well as participate in the court of public opinion, just like I did. We simply used means other than a blog to do so.

The only epic fail that has taken place lies with you, commie lemmings. You and your sad attempt to try and win an argument about an issue that's already been decided. If you really need something to whine about, I'm sure you can go find someone advocating for a new Vikings stadium to bother...

Posted by: Snyder at September 30, 2008 12:47 PM

The real solution should have been the [b]TWIN[/b] set of [b]DOMES[/b]. It was the common sense solution instead of this pink rhinocerous the Twins are building.

Posted by: Tony at September 30, 2008 5:42 PM

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