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January 4, 2006

There he goes...

Josh left for Camp Shelby today. Man, that was the HARDEST goodbye so far. We got up a little after 6am and he finished packing. Josh was more quiet and reserved than normal. I could tell it wasn't easy for him to leave. I managed not to cry for most of the morning. I drove him to the airport where I was able to get a gate pass and stay with Josh until he had to board his plane. We went through security, ate some breakfast, and then went to his gate and waited for the plane. I tried to make Josh laugh a little and he held my hand tightly. Then they called his row, he stood up, picked up his bag, and said it was time for him to go. I stood up and put on my coat. I hugged him. It was only then that I started to cry. I was a little proud of myself for holding off on crying until it got to that point. I told him I loved him and he headed for his plane. I watched him board and saw him look back a couple times. Then he was gone. I didn't wait around for the plane to leave. That would've been too hard. I called my Mom and cried to her a little. She turned the conversation to our daughter and that made me feel better. I spent a little while at Josh's grandma's house on the way back from the airport and then headed home.

Josh called around 2:30pm CST to let me know he'd arrived in Atlanta and was on the bus to Camp Shelby with the other soldiers. I was glad to hear he caught an early bus so perhaps he'll be back at Shelby before midnight so he can get some rest before he has to work tomorrow. He said he had to wait an HOUR AND A HALF for his luggage in Atlanta. It seems that is typical these days (stupid airlines). I think the bus ride from Atlanta to Camp Shelby is about 8 hours or so. Perhaps he'll call (if he isn't too tired) when he gets back to his barracks. We'll see.

Anyway, Josh has left Minnesota for now. He expects to be at Camp Shelby for a few weeks and then it will be off to the Middle East in a few weeks. He's part of a group that is going before the rest of the Brigade so no official farewell ceremonies for me. That does save me the cost of flying down to Mississippi to say goodbye to him in March (they are having official farewell ceremonies for the Brigade then, but Josh will already be gone), but it also means that today's goodbye was my farewell ceremony. It's hard to believe that the next time I see him, he'll likely be coming from Iraq. I tried to put that thought out of my mind as I hugged him this morning.

At least I won't be completely alone - soon I'll have our little girl to keep me company and of course, keep me very busy. Let the countdown to Josh's return start now!!!

January 3, 2006

Here she is...

The sonogram was this morning. We're having a girl! I was surprised. I really thought it would be a boy, but I didn't care really - I was just happy that she appears healthy. The technician complimented our daughter on her "well-defined brain structures." Would you expect any less from the two of us? Ha ha ha. Our baby was eager to show off her brain, but was a little more shy about her other body parts. After awhile, however, we managed to see more of her. We saw her arms, legs, hands, heart, stomach, spine, and kidneys. We even saw her stick out her tongue once. She liked putting her hand over her face. Silly girl! Anyway, here is one of the best images we got this morning. You can see her profile in the sonogram image here:

sonogram-profile-smaller.jpg

That's our baby! All in all, it was a wonderful appointment. It was very exciting to see our daughter. I am so glad I could share the moment with Josh.

Tomorrow, Josh leaves Minnesota. It will likely be the last time I see him for 18 months or so. I am using all my strength to be strong and optimistic, but it is hard to say goodbye. I know it will be okay once he goes and I will adjust and go on, but it's the saying goodbye part - especially knowing that he won't see his baby for such a long time - that is hard. I try to stay positive though and the baby is a great joy that we are both looking forward to, deployment or not. This week, Josh allowed me to videotape him reading stories and singing songs so that hopefully, I can play those for the baby when it arrives so that she can hear his voice right from the start (even if she doesn't know who he is exactly).

Best of all, Josh will be back around the baby's first birthday so perhaps our daughter will still be young enough to forget that he was even gone - she'll probably just be glad to have one more person show up who will entertain her! (And I have no doubt that Josh will oblige.) I'm already looking forward to the homecoming - the countdown begins tomorrow! Until then, baby and I will take each day as it comes and appreciate all the support and well-wishes we've received from our family and friends.