There seem to be many different problems upon arriving at the University. Is your rommate really as nice as he/she seemed on the phone? Are there going to be mysterious stains on the mattress? Is there really such a thing as the freshmen 15? I have come to the conclusion that the third one is the most difficult to manage. The first one you can deal with i.e. you don't have to be in your dorm all of the time. The second one you can cover up and pretend you never saw. The third one, however, is the bain of every freshmen's existence, well not even just freshmen. I have come up with a theory on the beginnings of this extra poundage. Where do we get most of our food? The UDS of course. So, it seems that they are the most likely cuprit. Could it be that the college wants us to gain rolls? Why do they feed us so much? Although it is entirely overpriced at the same time. We must ban together in order to overcome this fattening fest. A call for arms in mass proportions is a necessity. Perhaps if they were to bring in real food with good nutrients this would no longer be a problem. It really seems as though there is a conspiracy going on here. They try to blame it on drinking which gives them a reason not to let students drink, the truth is, it's really them helping us put the weight on. We know what's really happening. Now all that needs to be done is a boycott of the hard buns and chocolate pancakes. Regular pancakes are the key.