Public Editor
Here are my comments on the 10/1/08 UMD Statesman.
--Chris Julin
COVER
The front page continues to look good. It grabs my attention and it's timely.
And once again there's news in the news section. The first two pages contain five stories, and no jumps. It's easy to read, and it's interesting to read.
LEADS
My favorite lead in this issue is on the Sara Jochems story. It has some color but still manages to tell me what the story's about.
As a former resident of Indiana, Corbin Smyth has a lot of things he needs to get used to: the Duluth weather, culture and his new position at the UMD Kirby Student Center director (KD).
I'm still seeing some topic leads in this issue – leads that say, essentially:
[EVENT] occurred at [PLACE] on [DAY OF WEEK].
That information, almost always, belongs further down in the story. At the top of the story we readers want to find something interesting, surprising or new that happened or was said. When UMD hosts a speaker or there's a gathering of some sort the fact of the event seldom makes for an interesting lead.
Professor John Hatcher has suggested that we institute a ban on topic leads at UMD. We haven't discussed penalties yet or who's in charge of enforcement.
QUOTE OF THE WEEK
This one jumped out at me from Ryan Hanson's story about Ultimate Frisbee:
"If it hadn't been for the hippies throwing Frisbees on the beach, the sport wouldn't be where it is."
PHOTOS AND LAYOUT
The photos look good this week. We get a couple of lovely shots of fall color. (It might be interesting to include a person or people in one of them.) Sports has a couple of nice shots, and so does A&E.
I think the photos could be used to better effect in several cases. I'm confused a bit by some of the layout decisions. On pages 3, 18 and 22 there are pairs of photos right next to each other, but in each case the photos are connected to different stories. It's confusing, and it looks a bit cluttered.
For a contrast, look at page 2 where the two photos, right next to each other, are connected to the same story. That's natural. It's what I expect when pictures are juxtaposed. On 3, 18 and 22 the photos look as though they belong to the same story. There's a thin vertical line separating them, but that's not enough help to the reader's eye. The photos need to be physically separate, and it would help if there's a clear anchor photo, one picture that's dominant on a page.
Page 18 offers a good example: The photos are both colorful and effective, but they fight with each other, sitting there cheek by jowl, roughly the same size at the top of the page.
TYPOS IN SPROTS
The sports section has two nice stories, but the errors detract from the page – especially when there are three that catch my eye immediately. The "Vollyball" headline needs another "e," and the byline needs a complete name for the reporter.
And I read the football story lead three times wondering if this was a bit of sports jargon I'd never run across before. I was intrigued to learn that "the University of Mary traveled to UMD to stop the steak last Saturday."
The next paragraph makes it clear: UMD is on a winning streak – no sirloin involved.
Comments
If we all do our part, topic leads will vanish from the landscape -- just like smoking on campus is no longer a problem.
Nice observations from the Public Editor. As a reader this week, I was most grateful to find no jumps on pages 2 and 3. The Statesman has put a lot of effort into the redesign this year and it is really coming together nicely.
Posted by: john hatcher | October 1, 2008 6:51 PM
I agree on the who, what, where, when, why leads... I hope that in the news section, there will be far fewer leads of this kind... I think you and Hatcher should be the lead police :)
Posted by: Jochems | October 1, 2008 10:30 PM
I agree 100% about topic leads! I am definitely going to work on making the leads more entertaining to read. I feel that the only time topic leads are necessary, is when you have room for a 50-word or less story. Ex. "Blood donors needed," article on page 2.
Perhaps the two journalism professors can instigate fuzzy ear muffs to writers who show excellence in lead writing?
Posted by: Jochems | October 2, 2008 11:12 AM
Good point, Sara. On a set-up story, especially a very short one that amounts to an announcement of an event -- like the blood drive story -- the when and were are bigger news.
And those are useful stories. It makes sense to run a story about a blood drive before it happens. There's not a lot of use in learning about it a week later.
I'd rather read about most events before they happen than after. Telling me that Bob and the Pop Tarts played a great show a couple nights ago is like taunting me for not having been there!
Posted by: Chris Julin | October 2, 2008 2:06 PM