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On this blog there are many poets, though I am not a writer I truly appreciate poetry and the depth in which they can speak to you. This poem speaks to me because it embodies exactly how I feel about life. Things are really what you want them to be, dreaming and hoping is real and if you are making the right decisions about your life and what makes you happy you will find that you can make your life as amazing as we all are. The fact that I made it on this trip brings tears to be eyes because I would have never thought that I would get an opportunity like this. Most people don't and it am utterly fortunate to have made it. I know that I am where I am in life because I pushed myself toward my dreams and it really is hard to accept in reality when it actually comes true. I can see this poem in the faces of each and every child at MaAfrika I hope that they figure out their dreams and chase them. I have never seen hope like I have seen hope here in South Africa. It's not like people are running around the streets spilling their stories but you can feel it in the presence of people you get to know. The staff at MaAfrika doesn't at all cry a story of pity for the families and kids that they work with, they see promise and have faith like I've never seen in their country. Knowing the whatever part they play will make a difference even if they only help one person and I will carry that in my spirit.

One thing that I want to take from this trip is the fact that time must be appreciated and used wisely. During this entire time I could barely figure out what day it was or what time it is because here that is not a concept that is of high importance. As a result the level of stress is not apparent in most people, they aren't yelling at the minibuses about the fact they have somewhere to be when they make a thousand stops. Though I know that I would be unable to completely ignore time at home it is my hopes that I can take more time for myself to reflect, learn, and absorb my surroundings. We all feel like we are always on the go and there is nothing that we can do about it but there is. I survived without my phone for 3 weeks and that is astronomical. Before this trip my blackberry was glued to my hand at all times if I wasn't texting, talking, or sending an email I was probably in the motion of reaching for my phone again. That is one key thing that I want to change. All of the face to face interactions were the most important parts of this trip and will be the most important parts for me. As a society I feel that people isolate themselves from human interactions and blame it on technology or not having time but that makes it even more important for people to make sure that they have human contact because it proves to impact the soul.

I know that a big question for everyone is going to be what now? Are we going to go on to our normal lives as if nothing happened or will we be changed? For me I feel that its going to take going home for me to realize that I have been changed. Though I feel I have been the product must be produced for me to feel that it's real. So my answer to what now is to wait, wait for an impact, wait for a changed and embrace it openly as I did this experience. There are many thoughts that run through my mind all the time. Especially at the farewell dinner when looking out to the window and watching the peacefulness of the water helped me reflect and I found myself drifting off and I feel that I might just stay in that state......

Relationships was a dynamic of the group that was interesting to me whether they be changed or altered in anyway, formed as they are new, or made to strengthen. My house which I deemed the "Brown House" got extremely close. There was commonality in our problems and we were able to identify with each other and in turned it helped us all grow. Throughout the trip I remember hitting Kiarra and kept saying we really made it. This was one of the relationships that strengthened as well we now have another common thing to add our list but a bond we will cherish for sure. But I also want to shed light on the relationship that we formed as a group. I honestly can say that I'm not the closest with everyone but I definitely knew that I would defend and make sure that my group was ok and we stuck together. That is one of the deepest bonds that I feel can happen between people when you are willing to go the distance to protect them.

Today was our free day to just go out and explore. We decided to go downtown and also to Camp's Bay. We took minibuses for the 1st time and it was interesting. All the hollering and screaming was a lot to deal with but the rides were quick and cheap so it worked out. Walking around downtown I got to see so many beautiful people and things. On one of the minibuses there were fun facts and it said that S.Africa is one of the most diverse countries. It surely is true, these people are BEAUTIFUL. I've been looking for other words but that is the one that works the best. They are so courteous and polite for the most part, even their accent is intriguing. Going back to the beach was something that I really wanted to do and we were able to take a bus around to view the area again and got to get onto the beach. Though it was not my intention to get wet at all the waves shocked me and I was soaked but It was ok because the time spent there was amazing. I never ever thought I would be somewhere that was so breathtaking but I was able to and am so grateful.

Today we worked with MaAfrika and most of my day was spent chopping onions, probably ten pounds of onions or more. We were chopping up vegetable for the next day's meal that is prepared in the soup kitchen for the clients in the family support program. Our table was in the courtyard where we could see the kids dancing so from time to time I would break and watch the kids and they have not stopped amazing me. Watching them interact with each other is nothing like working with kids their age in the US. They are the most courteous and mannered kids I've seen in a long time. There was a part of their dance lesion where they got into a semicircle and one child would go into the middle and do some sort of freestyle dance. They cheered and clapped for every single person that got into the middle. Back home you just don't see the same type of encouragement from kids. I figured by the end of the time we would be working with them we would have seen at least one fight or argument amongst them but that has not happened.
I know that this has to be a part of the culture. Though I was in a tearful state from the onions I could clearly see that there is a difference in the manners they these children embrace. Another interesting conversation that I had was from a woman named Michelle. She walked up to us while we were chopping onions and jumped right into conversation about everything, where we were from? What we were doing here and how we liked it thus far. So we engaged in the conversation and learned a bit about her as well. Her children play at MaAfrika she lives close to the center and she also does some volunteering there. She told us that she is so blessed because she has a job and she doesn't fear her children's safety. So because of her many blessings she volunteers her time and loves to give.
Michelle's statement hit me so strongly; she expresses her gratefulness for the basic necessities in a way that is truly appreciative. Whereas in America people don't realize that they are fortunate and decide to give up time and energy for people that are less fortunate. During this experience I felt great about the work that we are doing with MaAfrika but to hear this story was so touching and realistic. It truly makes me question what the hell are Americans are grateful for? All these thoughts coming from tears and onions.

Today started at MaAfrika painting and gardening was on the agenda. We also brought music from home to share with the kids since they taught us the dance that they were working on the previous day. But first we had to do the real work, we split up into groups and had more work cut out for us than we thought. Gardening was a challenge and most of us don't do much of that work at home. Some of the areas meant for weeding were entirely filled and nothing was being grown there, so it was great to clear some space for potential vegetables to be grown. The vegetables are used at the soup kitchens in which are located around Delft for the community. Although we didn't finish all of the weeding because of the EXTREMELY hot sun, it looks so much better than before. The painting was being done in the kitchen, they wanted it painted a bright yellow and we added the idea of the kids putting their hand prints on one of the walls to add a personal touch. While some of us kept painting the rest went out to teach the kids a dance. We taught them the Cupid Shuffle and they loved it, they got right in and it didn't take long for them to get the hang of it. After that we just played more of our music for them to dance to. Hours went by so fast because everyone was up and dancing around with the kids. It was the perfect way to end the day of work at the center.

Later that afternoon we had class that was centered around forgiveness, this was such a difficult concept to grasp when using it in context with apartheid. We watched a documentary about the Truth and Reconciliation Commission in which survivors of apartheid could go and tell their story as well as confront their perpetrators about family members that lost their lives. Perpetrators were also their given the chance to tell the truth about what they did to receive amnesty. Desmond Tutu led the proceedings because it was his belief that by hearing the stories there was a chance to heal the nation. What was extremely hard to wrap our minds around was the fact that actual people brutally killed others during this time and showed little remorse. Our conversation after related our own lives to the concept of forgiveness and how hard it actually is to forgive. Many mixed emotions that arose during the conversation ranging from anger, hatred, sorrow, but at the same time a sense of hope. The fact that South Africans have come so far from the hell that they went through during apartheid in 15 yrs is astonishing. Forgiveness is something that we will all need to work into our lives, in the words of Desmond Tutu "Without forgiveness there is really no future" and thats the message South Africans are teaching us.