I don't know what it is but there's something that goes on between women. You men know that because it's the same for you. I'm not saying one sex is better then the other. I'm just saying, like speaks to like. Love or whatever doesn't always keep. So you found out what does, if you're lucky. –Robin, Boys on the Side
The relationships between women in Boys on the Side challenge the existing social structure on a variety of levels. Firstly, the crossing of racial boundaries: Jane embodies the archetypal Urban black woman (also lesbian, which we’ll get to later). Jane is forward, brazen, and unapologetic. However, she does not confine herself to this social circle. The women who grow to be her two closet confidants are both white, one of them (as Jane states), “The whitest woman on the planet�. Although these women approach the topic of race, they do so only in a curious (and comic) manner, such as when Robin asks, “Is this a black/white thing?�. Similarly, Robin serves as the stereotypical, Type-A, controlling, anal-retentive, timid white woman. However, as the two women spend more and more time together, they shed some of the layers of their stereotypes, and take on attributes the other possesses. For example, after spending a mere day together, Robin begins to lose some of her tittering mousiness by taking hold of the chaotic situation at Nick’s apartment. Jane also allows some of the gruffness she started the film with to fall away as she spends time with Robin and Holly. Jane allows tenderness to show through during the scene in the hospital when Robin admits she has nowhere else to go. Both women are care takers of Holly, who takes on the role of the child in the relationship. Although she is the one giving birth herself, the two older women act as parents, guiding Holly through the naiveté of her youth, and helping deal with the mistakes of her recklessness.
The women also break down social structures by being accepting of both homosexuality, and those living with the results with social/sexual immorality. After the women discover each others secrets (being gay, being pregnant, being HIV positive), they do not distance themselves from one another or seek to demonize behavior. Instead, they offer one another a place of refuge both psychologically (Jane offering friendship and support), and physical (Robin offering up her home as a haven for all 3 women). None of these women expect one another to conform to socially normative behavior. This acceptance continues even when Holly involves herself with a man that the other two disapprove of, a man who completely ascribes to the heteronormative/white/law abiding way of life.
Despite the ‘falling out’ the women experience, they reconcile in such a way that reinscribes the typical family. The family has all the necessary components: adults, children, a house, etc.; however, they do not appear in a typical fashion. The child is biracial, and the man taking care of her is not her real father. One woman is stricken with AIDS, a disease once completely associated with homosexuality, must be completely cared for by others. Another is both black and gay. However, the women have learned to form social bonds outside the normative structure, as Robin states, “I'm just saying, like speaks to like. Love or whatever doesn't always keep. So you found out what does, if you're lucky�.
