Anything You Want
Robin, it is you I love.
Robin,
I was hesitant to join you on your journey, because I felt we had little in common. I needed to move in order to keep singing and the free transportation was nice, so I agreed to go with you. I figured I could tolerate being in a vehicle with you for the length of the trip and then be on my way. But, our trip changed me. We made it through Nick's death and your hospital stay and I just couldn't leave you. I wanted to protect you from your illness. I'm sorry I tried to set you up with my friend. I only wanted to see you happy. I wanted you to forget you were sick. I didn't think you wanted me, so I wanted to help you be with someone you could love. I should have told you how I felt sooner. You became my best friend and I love you. I don't need to put on a tough exterior. I can be black and I can be lesbian and I don't need to always be ready to defend myself. You taught me that I can trust you. I feel safe with you. I wish you could have expressed your feelings for me sooner too. I understand that your mother and society views lesbians as different and it would have been incredibly difficult for you to openly express your love for me. But, what we share is not something to hide. It is something to share and be proud of. We share a love that will last forever. It is an emotional connection that cannot be broken. I miss you every day you are gone, but I am glad that you are no longer suffering. Know that you are still loved and with me each day.
"One look from you - I drift away. I pray that you are here to stay. Anything you want - you got it."
Love, Jane